Friday, April 26, 2024

Nursing

Intern Inadvertently Orders Negative Pressure Ventilation; Patient Placed in Iron Lung

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DALLAS, TX - While placing orders on rounds, intern TooMany Orders clicked over to the Respiratory section in the hospital’s surprisingly thorough EMR. The patient was having difficulty breathing, and he needed to place...

Fifth Pressor Discovered: ICU Stay Extended 2 Days, No Difference in Outcome

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LOS ANGELES, CA – Critical care physicians and nurses rejoiced Thursday at the news of a 5th vasopressor drug-class discovery. 5-omega-dopanephrinone or "Omnipress" is a new vasopressor recently fast tracked by the FDA overnight.  "It...
drinking alcohol

Hospital Opens Bar, All Healthcare Problems Solved

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MINEOLA, NY - Some ideas are so revolutionary, they can only be conceived in a stroke of genius.  Such is the case with Northrop University Hospital as the hospital opened 'Dischargigans', a lively and...

Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult

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If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked.  It is the end of the day and all you want to do is go home but where...

By Popular Overdose Demand: Activated Charcoal Smoothie at Your Local ER

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HARTFORD, CT - Get those Press-Ganey scores up with the new Activated Charcoal Smoothie! With the number of intentional and unintentional overdoses skyrocketing across the nation, the ER at local St. Indignant’s Health Care...

Effort in Safety: Nurse Requests Patient’s Identification 150 Times in 1 Shift

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BOSTON, MA - Nurse Tracy Painter, RN, BSN, now holds a national record.  In the course of one ER shift, she asked the same patient for his name and birthdate a whopping 150 times....
Ctrl+Alt+Del

Computer Resuscitated After 6 Rounds of Ctrl+Alt+Del

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NASHVILLE, TN - Gomerblog is happy to report that a code team at Nashville Medical Center (NMC) has successfully resuscitated an old nurses station computer after 6 rounds of Ctrl+Alt+Del. "The computer became so slow that...

Barn Birthing Centers Gaining Popularity Across Nation

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BROOKLYN, IA – A new birthing option for expectant mothers is currently taking the nation by storm.  Barn birthing will soon supplant the water birth as the go-to option for women wanting a more natural birthing...
Gas-X brain farts

Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized by a temporary mental lapse, and now formally recommend Gas-X...

Proactive Patient Does Own Admission Orders, H&P

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QUEENS, NY - In one of the best examples in recent memory of medical self-ownership, a proactive patient not only sought medical attention but also did his own admission orders and H&P...