OB-GYN

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God Makes Patient NPO After Midnight for Miracle in the Morning

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HEAVENS ABOVE - According to Gomerblog cherubs close to the All Powerful, God has informed nursing staff at Garden of Eden Medical Center to make...
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CDC: Stop Using Purulent Speculums as Tongue Depressors

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ATLANTA, GA - Disturbed by a surge in case reports driven by medical providers who are either short on equipment or just extremely lazy,...
second thoughts Da Vinci OB-GYN

Attention Pregnant Women, Make Womb for the Robotic Midwife!

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Citing increased patient demand for high-tech solutions to problems that don’t exist, C.L. Uless, CEO of OB/GYN Kenobi Inc. has introduced the first robotic...
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Charting is Independent Risk Factor for DVT and PE, Study Finds

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ROCHESTER, MN - Recognizing it is a form of immobilization in which health care professionals are unable to move around much, a study newly published...
ultrasound

Surgeon Performs In-Utero Tommy John Surgery

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KANSAS CITY – A surgeon in Kansas City reports he has performed the world’s first in-utero Tommy John surgery. A hospital spokesperson states that the...
cave drawings

Archeologists Discover Cave Drawings of Pitocin Infusion on Postpartum Woman

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GIF KEBIR, LIBYA - Researchers from Indiana university announced an important finding in caves outside of Gif Kebir, Libya yesterday.  According to an Indiana University...
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Royal Baby Born, London Mother Self-Delivers

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LONDON, ENGLAND – With the entire world watching, the Royal Baby was born at 4:24 p.m., weighing 8 pounds, 6 ounces, APGARS 8 and 9,...
second thoughts Da Vinci OB-GYN

Pregnant Mother Having Second Thoughts About Da Vinci as Her OB/GYN

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NEW YORK, NY - “It dawned on me as I had my legs apart and Da Vinci loomed over me with his intimidating red...
pregnancy

Vaccinations Now Definitively Linked to Pregnancy

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BOSTON, MA - A new study just published in the Old England Journal of Medicine now definitively links childhood vaccinations to pregnancy. Jenny McCarthy,...
bouncy house

So You’re Paged While in a Bouncy House, What to Do Next

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There you are, jumping around happily in a bouncy house when the unthinkable happens: you get paged.  Well, maybe not unthinkable since you are...