News-in-Brief

Short Articles for Your Short Attention Span

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News in Brief: Medication IV Pump Coincidentally Runs Out at Change of Shift

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DALLAS, TX – Nurses on Mercy Hospital’s floor 4, med-surg unit, are perplexed.  "The Alaris pumps seem to always run out 20 minutes after...
e-cigarettes

News in Brief: Life Expectancy for Douchebags Climbing Thanks to E-cigarettes

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ATLANTA, GA - Although they are a relatively new phenomenon, electronic cigarettes are a slightly healthier alternative to traditional combustible and inhaled tobacco products. ...
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Medical Referral Placed to Bronies Facebook Group for Second Opinion

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HOUSTON, TX - 48-year-old Mark Wilkersten has been battling with bilateral knee pain for several years now.  After seeing his primary care doctor for...
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Protamine Shortage Amid Strike at Salmon Sperm Acquisition Factory

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DALLAS, TX - Add another to the list: protamine.  This antidote to heparin is on national shortage and warnings are being issued to hospitals...
angry nurse

Top 10 Ways to Really Piss Your Nurse Off

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Ever wonder how you can really piss off your nurse taking care of you in the hospital?  If you are like most of us,...
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Local Mom Meets Fellow Anti-Vaxxer at Botox Clinic

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CHARLOTTE, NC - Charlotte mom Sarah Catherine Murdoch, 34, was delighted to make a new friend after striking up a conversation with another patron...
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This Day in Medical History: Patient Bled to Death When Only a 3 x...

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THIS DAY IN MEDICAL HISTORY, 1917 - Patient Joseph Hails suffered from a wound that was exactly 4 inches by 4 inches.  His injury wasn’t unique,...
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National Healthcare Crisis Solved in Blog Comment Section

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MADISON, WI - In a lesser-known EM Physician’s blog, found buried in the comment section, contains the solution to our nation’s healthcare crisis.  After...

Sexy Ebola Nurses Released from 45-Day Quarantine

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MOBRIDGE, SD - The nation breathed a sigh of relief today as hordes of sexy Ebola nurses were released from the place of quarantine...