Friday, April 8, 2022

Study: Hopscotch Leading Cause of Hip Fractures in Elderly

BOSTON, MA - A byproduct of the children's game that has become an inexplicable epidemic among our baby boomers, a study newly published in the New England Journal of Bones has once again named...
plastic grabber

Colonoscopes Replaced by Plastic Reachers from Home Depot

CHICAGO, IL - Hospital administrators are looking to tighten the pursestrings some more as they look to replace colonoscopes with plastic reachers & grabbers from Home Depot.  Gastroenterologists are up in arms. “I can’t use...

OJ and Neurosurgery Resident Both Released From Prison After 9 Years

GOMERBLOG HQ - It was announced earlier today that OJ Simpson was being released from prison after a 9-year sentence for stealing sports memorabilia.  Coincidentally, 33-year-old neurosurgery resident Carson Harry was also released from...
femur stethoscope

Orthopod Caught Listening to Femur with Stethoscope

ATLANTA, GA - In an awkward moment at a patient's bedside earlier today, orthopedic surgeon Thor Hammersley was caught doing what can only be described as a head-scratcher: auscultating his patient's surgically-repaired femur with a stethoscope. "I...
border drape wall

Trump: Anesthesiology Will Build Border Drape Wall & Pay for It

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Publicly acknowledging that efforts to build a border wall and have Mexico pay for it has failed, President Donald Trump has tweeted his thoughts on a new Plan B: Have anesthesiologists...
G-tube G-spot

The Difference Between A G-Tube & The G-Spot

GomerBlog returns to help distinguish between two similar but often confused entities. The "G" in G-tube refers to "gastric" or "gastrostomy." A G-tube is a type of feeding...

April Fools! This Nurse Was Assigned Only 1 New Admit, Turns Out It Was...

SACRAMENTO, CA - When Nurse Shannon came to work today, she was assigned to only one admit.  "Are we slow?" Shannon thought as to refrain from saying such horrid words aloud.  APRIL FOOLS! Her...