New England Journal Replaces Logo with Pic of Bill Belichick
BOSTON, MA - While Atlanta blames anesthesia for the Falcons' epic second-half collapse in Super Bowl LI, Boston continues to celebrate. In the latest set...
Cardiologists Now Deploying Bacon-Eluting Stents
NASHVILLE, TN - Unfazed by the obesity epidemic and the glorious number of unhealthy choices at their disposal, Americans are always looking for innovative, quicker ways...
Falcons Blame Super Bowl Loss on Anesthesia
HOUSTON, TX - The New England Patriots came back from a 25-point deficit to complete the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history, winning 34-28...
Forrest Gump Still in Rhabdo 30 Years After Epic Cross-Country Run
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Though it has been three decades since his historic three-and-a-half year cross-country run brought him national attention, Birmingham Medical Center (BMC)...
Sleeping Beauty Wakes Up After Single Dose of Narcan
MEDIEVAL ENGLAND - In a last ditch effort to prevent intubation for airway protection, Sleeping Beauty - also known as Princess Aurora, the daughter of...
Intern Describes Patient’s Pillow as Soft, Nontender
SACRAMENTO, CA - Intern Dale Sheppard went to see one of his patients early this morning, only to find her stewing because the pillows were...
Orthopod Caught Auscultating Ancef Pump
ATLANTA, GA - "Shhh," orthopedic surgeon Thor Hammersley told befuddled onlookers as he used a stethoscope (or, as he puts it, "a mini jump rope") to...
Unbelievable: Trump Signs Executive Order to Limit ER Usage
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The executive orders (EO) just keep coming. President Donald Trump just signed an EO stating: "No one is allowed to go...
FDA Approves Groundbreaking Postmortem Chemotherapy Protocol
BOCA RATON, FL - Sending shockwaves throughout the medical community, the Food & Drug Administration approved a postmortem chemotherapy regimen to be administered after...
Obstetrician Preferred to be Called ‘Vagician’
TARNIHONNOK, MD - Local OB/GYN or self proclaimed vagician, Dr. Fredrick Schmidt, refuses to wear traditional scrubs in the delivery room. He'll dim the lights,...