So Much for Denuclearization: Korean Leaders Pledge “Enucleation,” Ophtho Consulted
KOREAN PENINSULA - Though the goal for both North Korean leader Kim Jung Un and South Korean leader Moon Jae-in was for peace and...
Study: Hopscotch Leading Cause of Hip Fractures in Elderly
BOSTON, MA - A byproduct of the children's game that has become an inexplicable epidemic among our baby boomers, a study newly published in...
Warning: Ortho Has a Bone to Pick with You
RALEIGH, NC - Gomerblog just wants to give you a heads up: Ortho has a bone to pick with you. It's unclear what bone...
Crossword Puzzle Shortage Has Nation’s Anesthesiologists in a Panic
SCHAUMBURG, IL - Sound the alarm bells: A nationwide crossword puzzle shortage has anesthesiologists from coast to coast in a panic, putting the livelihood of...
Ophthalmologists Found to be “Physically Weakest” of All Specialists
New research has shed light on which group of physicians are the most physically frail and feeble. Emerging data shows that the top spot...
Breaking: VA Pick Ronny Jackson Withdraws from Both Nomination, Opioids
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the "baseless and anonymous attacks on my character" as well as intractable abdominal cramps, lacrimation, and rhinorrhea, White House physician Rear...
Ortho Consults Medicine to See if It’s Spelled Orthopedics or Orthopaedics
BOSTON, MA - Unable to settle a decades-long debate amongst themselves, orthopods at Massachusetts General Hospital (MGH) have swallowed their pride and consulted their...
CDC Quarantines Jenny McCarthy
ATLANTA, GA -- Due to the severe flu outbreak this season, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has decided to examine the...
New Seizure Dogs Give Rectal Peanut Butter Diastat
Amidst the recent overhaul of policies regarding service animals, the National Service Animal Society (NSAS) has announced a new type of service animal who...
Goat Sacrifice to Ba’al Replaces Medicine Rounds, No Change in Patient Outcomes
During the seventh hour of internal medicine rounds one day, Dr. Frownalot had an intriguing idea. After hearing the resident present a patient with...