Probiotics, Antibiotics Battling for Supremacy in Man’s Intestines
MAN'S SMALL BOWEL - For those who have been keeping score, it has been an absolute nail-biter as probiotics Lactobacillus & Bifidobacterium and antibiotics Levaquin & Flagyl battle for supremacy in this poor man's...
Full-Strength Aspirin Now 331 Milligrams to Adjust for Inflation
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Food & Drug Administration (FDA) in conjunction with the U.S. Department of the Treasury have reported that they have increased a full-strength aspirin to 331 mg after adjusting for an...
Breaking: Nurse Initiates Lesser-Known Chloride Repletion Protocol
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Nurse Jess Casamento of Ochsner Medical Center is one of the best when it comes to repleting electrolytes: potassium, magnesium, even phosphorus. Today, however, she took it to another level and...
Tips: How to Treat a Pager That Keeps Going Off Like It Has Seizures
Sadly, despite all the technological advances we've made, a good portion of health care professionals still carry an object as archaic and arguably less useful than an abacus: a pager (also known as the Grim...
Dammit, It’s a Ruse! Nystatin Isn’t a Statin After All
BETHESDA, MD - The medical world is at a loss for words after scientists at the National Institute of Health (NIH) dropped the megaton bombshell that nystatin isn't a real statin after all. That's...
Breaking: Man of Steel Has Subclavian Steal Syndrome
METROPOLIS, US – Superman is back in the hospital at Metropolis Medical Center (MMC). This time he presents with syncope and poor circulation in his left hand. Turns out the Man of Steel has...
Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home
PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or going home for the day. However, one hospitalist named Dan...
Want to Throw the Kitchen Sink at Your Patient? It Now Comes in IV...
PARAMUS, NJ - Leaky Ivy Pharmaceuticals announced that the increasingly popular Kitchen Sink will now be available in an IV form. Reported Dr. Remy Kade, CEO of Leaky Ivy. “Throwing The Kitchen Sink at...
True to Its Name: Life Savers Prevented 3 Million Deaths in 2017
CLEVELAND, OH - A survey conducted by the National Institutes of Health (NIH) has gotten everyone's attention as it revealed that Life Savers hard candies were responsible for preventing the deaths of 3 million...
Telemedicine Doctor Probably Wearing Shorts, Possibly Only Boxers
BOCA RATON, FL -- Patients have long wondered what telemedicine provider Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram is wearing on the bottom half of his body during remote patient encounters via webcam, and an extensive Gomerblog investigative series...