Wow, Hospitalist Appreciating the Hell Outta Everyone in Today’s Progress Note
DURHAM, NC - In a particularly thankful mood today, hospitalist Poonam Trivedi has really gone all out, appreciating the hell out of everyone today in her progress...
Attending to Attending Conversation Upgraded To Category 5
CHARLESTON, SC - The impending attending to attending conversation scheduled to hit the 6th floor this evening was recently upgraded to Category 5, bringing with...
Contrary to Consultant’s Advice, Doctor is Now Hesitant to Call Back with Any Questions
AUSTIN, TX - After admitting a patient with end-stage congestive heart failure, third-year internal medicine resident Amanda Cummings consulted the cardiology service to help...
VA Hospitals to Close their Doors in Honor of Veterans Day
WASHINGTON, D.C. - During a holiday season filled with PSLs, sweets and gifts, November has always been a month of giving thanks marked by...
Breaking: Iron Man Diagnosed with Hemochromatosis
NEW YORK, NY - After his primary care physician insist he undergo several tests over the past month to uncover the cause of his...
Ugh, Not Again: GI Lab Full of A**holes Today
ROCKFORD, IL - One local gastroenterology group is at wit's end as they realize that today is once again going to be like any...
AMiON Scheduler To Be Replaced With A Simplified Text Saying ‘Yes’
NEWTON, MA - In a move aimed at reducing operative costs, Spiral software's administrative staff issued a statement according to which AMiON popular scheduler is...
Attending Answers Telephone at Nurse’s Station, Immediately Regrets Decision
IOWA CITY, IA - Havoc struck the medical ICU this morning when 49 year old intensivist Oliver Reynolds inexplicably decided to answer a telephone...
Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized...
Fifth Season of Netflix’s ‘Narcos’ To Be Set In Washington, D.C.
SCOTTS VALLEY, CA - Seasons 1 through 3 chronicled the drug trade through Columbia, Season 4 is poised to go to Mexico, and it...