U.S. on COVID-19: “Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, You’re My Only Hope”
TATOOINE - While cleaning his new R2-D2 droid after purchasing them from the Jawas, Luke Skywalker accidentally triggered a holographic recording of a desperate...
COVID-19: TV Docs to be Called Upon in Time of Crisis
ATLANTA, GA - In light of the ongoing coronavirus pandemic, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) is now officially requesting fictional doctors...
FDA: Keep Reusing Your Mask Until You Eventually Catch Coronavirus
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Acknowledging the current shortage of both N95 and surgical masks, the U.S. Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has issued a very...
Residents Dismiss Report They Rarely Wash White Coats: “We Don’t Wash Our Regular Clothes...
HYGIENE, CO—According to a recent study, doctors rarely, if ever, launder their white lab coats, a nauseating fact given that these coats carry and...
COVID Beauty Tips & Tricks
COVID-19 has meant we’re all working long hours in the hospital, sometimes even with personal protective equipment (PPE). Here are some tips to help...
Breaking: Bronx Zoo Tiger with COVID-19 Leaves Hospital AMA
BRONX, NY - Nadia, a 4-year-old Amur tiger from the Bronx Zoo, who recently tested positive for COVID-19, has left the hospital against medical...
FDA Recommends Americans Reuse Toilet Paper
WASHINGTON, D.C. - It is well-known that we are still in the midst of the Great Toilet Paper Crisis of 2020. In a...
COVID-19: ACGME Redeploys Interns to Check on Healthcare Workers’ Parents
CHICAGO, IL - The Accreditation Council for Graduate Medical Education (ACGME) announced that interns will no longer see patients not only to preserve personal...
Part-Time Medical Professional at Hospital with No COVID-19 Cases Lines Up Selfie in Full...
Times are tough for those in healthcare: the novel SARS CoV-2, personal protective equipment shortages, national runs on inhalers and hydroxychloroquine, public health leadership...
FEMA to Distribute T-Rex Costumes to Hospitals Amidst PPE Shortages
ATLANTA, GA – As America continues to take on the COVID-19 pandemic, hospitals across the country have been struggling to maintain adequate supplies of...