Hospital Wristband Finally Identify ‘Pain in the A**’ Patients
SILICON VALLEY, CA – Following failed internal quality improvement efforts targeting drug-seeking patients, one California hospital took on a new tactic for difficult-to-deal-with patients.
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Uber Rolls Out New ED-to-ED Transit Service for Drug Seekers
PHILADELPHIA, PA - Filling a niche in a market that has been underserved for years, on-demand transportation company, Uber, has rolled out a novel...
New Study Links Birthing Mirrors to Vaginal Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
A new study published in the Journal of Vaginal Psychology (J Vag Psy) is reporting a possible link between the use of birthing mirrors...
APA Finally Admits It Just Too Damn Lazy to Add Treatment Section to DSM
WASHINGTON, DC—The American Psychiatric Association (APA) has at long last definitively answered a question that has been floating around ever since the publication of...
Patient with Munchausen Syndrome Disappointed to Develop actual Disease
The sixth-floor inpatient medical ward, a normally bustling wing of the J. Hoffa Memorial Hospital, became decidedly more somber today. The etiology lay in...
Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease
NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases." Unfortunately,...
Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
Drug Seeker Fills Entire Emesis Bucket with Noise Before Receiving Dilaudid
DAYTONA BEACH, FL - Deborah Samson, a 47-year-old non-diabetic drug seeker with a terrible but mysterious case of opioid-induced abdominal pain, was forced last week...
Breaking: Patient Reports 9 Out of 10 (Emotional) Pain
SAN DIEGO, CA - Laura Martin reported that she was in pain when her nurse came to check in on her.
"How bad is your...
