Psychiatry

astrology

Astrological Signs Predict What Kind of Patient You Are

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA — An assembly of doctors who keep notes about the behavior of their patients grouped by astrological sign has released its...

ER Places Bowl Full of Percocet in Waiting Room, Lowers Visits

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HANOVER, NJ – Local emergency medicine physicians have developed a groundbreaking way to reduce the number of patients they will see during a shift.  The...
elderly lady

Incredibly Narcissistic Patient with Dementia Remains Oriented Only to Self

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In what can only be described as a sickening display of pure narcissism, Gertrude Walters, an 82 year-old woman with advanced dementia, has remained...
respiratory system secedes capacity

Psychiatry Consulted to Determine if Lungs Have Capacity

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BOSTON, MA - In an unusual move yesterday at Massachusetts Lieutenant General Hospital (MGLH), a medical team has consulted psychiatry to determine if their...

Dr. Hal Dole Voted Best Psychiatrist of the Year

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KEARNEY, NE - For the tenth year in the row, the venerable Dr. Hal Dole was recognized as the most effective psychiatrist by the...
ADHD

Pediatric Community Stunned When Patient Brings Back Vanderbilt Forms for ADHD Evaluation

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LECOMA, MO - After being seen in the clinic about a week ago for chronic behavioral outburst, a local 9-year-old boy and his parents...

Doctor Has Pseudoseizure to Avoid Patient with Pseudoseizures

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TAMPA BAY, FL - Zelda Wilkins credits her “high pain tolerance” as the only way she can handle her affliction with pseudoseizures.  Despite frequenting...
psychiatry resident

Due to Late Consult, Psychiatrist Leaves Hospital After 3 PM

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Psychiatry resident Dr. David Smith left the hospital around 3:30pm today, after arriving at about 11 am.  At press time Dr. Smith could not...

Therapy Dogs Now Required to Write Progress Notes

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BOSTON, MA – In another unprecedented move by the Joint Commission (JC), therapy dogs will now be required to write progress notes on the patients...
adhd veterinarian

Veterinarians Overdiagnosing Pets with ADD

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BETHESDA, MD - The National Institutes of Health (NIH) released a troubling report which suggested that veterinarians in the U.S. are overprescribing stimulants to...