Psychiatry

march madness

Patient Admitted to Psych with March Madness

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HOUSTON, TX - In breaking news, GomerBlog has learned 28-year-old James Winthrop will be admitted to Psychiatry for March Madness.  He presented to the...
psychiatrist

Psychiatrist Calls Code for Physical Exam

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Dr. Oliver Starsky was recently honored at the American Psychiatric Association’s Annual Meeting after he called a code blue on a psychiatric patient who...

Psychiatry Residents Estimate that 30% of Consults are for Comatose Patients

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Dr. Charles Willis scowls at his beeping pager for interrupting his lunch break. “Christ almighty, I can’t sit down for a couple hours without...
dilaudid gastroparesis

Drug Seeker Fills Entire Emesis Bucket with Noise Before Receiving Dilaudid

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DAYTONA BEACH, FL - Deborah Samson, a 47-year-old non-diabetic drug seeker with a terrible but mysterious case of opioid-induced abdominal pain, was forced last week...
iv flush

Exciting New Treatment for ‘Status Dramaticus’ Released Today by the FDA and NIH

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BETHESDA, MD - Breaking news today from the FDA and NIH researchers in Bethesda,  MD.  A new treatment for Status Dramaticus (SD) has been...

The 7 Stages of Grief When Faced with an Admission

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The Rübler-Koss model or 7 stages of grief is a series of emotional stages an admitting attending experiences when faced with an impending admission....

Psychiatrist Joins WWE and Puts Opponent in a Mental Health Hold

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LUBBOCK, TX – Finally fed up with all the bullying he was receiving from general surgeons, Dr. Froyd abandoned his post as Consultation-Liaison Psychiatrist...
icu pumps

American Geriatrics Association Publishes Guidelines on Gomeritis

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The American Geriatrics Association has finally published its guidelines on gomeritis, a complex entity caused by the progressive deterioration of a gomerular brain.  A...
stressed medical student

APA Finally Admits It Just Too Damn Lazy to Add Treatment Section to DSM

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WASHINGTON, DC—The American Psychiatric Association (APA) has at long last definitively answered a question that has been floating around ever since the publication of...
laughter best medicine Ativan

Breaking: Ativan is the Best Medicine, Laughter Falls to Sixth

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BOSTON, MA - Is laughter the best medicine?  Not any more.  According to a new poll of physicians and other medical providers published in the New England...