Psychiatry

turkey sandwich haldol diets

New Haldol Creamy Spread Added to Emergency Room Sandwiches

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PROVIDENCE, RI - Health care providers are raving about a new haloperidol-based condiment that can be surreptitiously added to almost any hospital meal tray,...
Trapped physician

Guest Delighted to Meet Physician at Party, Discusses Medical Symptoms for a Soul-Crushing 45...

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CHARLOTTE, NC - Last week at a cocktail party, a local woman was thrilled to learn that a another guest was a practicing internist.  "I've...
Mr. Potato Head fryer French fries

Tragedy: Mr. Potato Head Takes Own Life by Jumping into Fryer

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BROOKLYN, NY - Unable to cope any longer after a lifetime of hospitalizations for recurrent organ detachment, beloved spud, 65-year-old Mr. Potato Head, has...
sun downing

On-Call Resident Realizes Entire Housestaff is Sundowning

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NEW YORK, NY - On her first overnight call, internal medicine intern Dr. Erica Dalton has realized the entire hospital staff is sundowning. “I...
ativan diffuser

FDA Finally Approves The Ativan Diffuser for All Hospital Units

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a closely contested vote, the FDA approved a new medical delivery device this week, the H-Vape 86.  It is an Ativan...
medical consults

A Primer to How We All Consult One Another

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Does your patient need help but you're just not sure who to consult for help? This GomerBlog primer is here to break things down...
emotional scar collagen

Breaking: Patient Reports 9 Out of 10 (Emotional) Pain

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SAN DIEGO, CA - Laura Martin reported that she was in pain when her nurse came to check in on her. "How bad is your...

Hospital Pilots Pet Therapy with Black Bears, Grizzlies

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VALHALLA, NY - Hospital administrators at Westchester Medical Center are piloting a new pet therapy program using service animals - black bears and grizzlies,...
baby ADHD

Enfamil with Adderall Approved for Infantile ADHD

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LEXINGTON, MA -  Spiral Pharmaceuticals has paired with baby formula giant Enfamil to create the world’s first amphetamine-fortified formula, which will treat a newly...