pokemon go

Pokemon Go Video Game Gets People To Go Outside

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CHICAGO, IL - Doctors are flabbergasted by what Nintendo has achieved. For years, they have been telling patients to stop playing video games and...
ophthalmology

Ophthalmologists Bracing Themselves for Full Day of Work After Solar Eclipse

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SALEM, OR - Ophthalmologists throughout the country are bracing themselves for what could be an entire day of work immediately after the solar eclipse...

COVID-19: CDC Recommends We Move to Antarctica While We Still Have the Chance

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ATLANTA, GA - Cautioning that its newest recommendation is not meant to alarm the American public or imply that we are losing the fight...

Lion King Remake to Include Mufasa’s Prolonged ICU Admission and Futile Care Prior to...

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ANAHEIM, CA - Disney studios has announced that the remake of the Lion King, slated to be released in mid-2019, will feature a more...
Sudoku

COVID-19: Self-Quarantined Anesthesiologist Running Dangerously Low on Sudoku Supplies

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - An area anesthesiologist who is currently 3 days into his 14-day self-imposed quarantine behind a drape fort is unusually anxious and...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

10 Out of 10 Providers Annoyed Vaseline & Baseline Don’t Rhyme

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ATLANTA, GA - Through a series of questionnaires and polls, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has uncovered a secret epidemic in...
Stryker drone

Secretary Tom Price Deploys Stryker Drone to Mass Vaccinate America for Flu

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Fresh off ex-fixing the Washington Monument, new Secretary of Health and Human Services and orthopedic surgeon Tom Price has turned his...

Easter Not Recognized as Holiday, Riots Ensue at Catholic Hospital

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HOSPITAL OF THE RESURRECTION - Religion is not a quiet affair at this institution.  Morning and evening prayers are broadcasted over the PA system...
epipen price increase

EpiPen Users Develop Shock Over EpiPen Prices: Treatment, More EpiPens

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WASHINGTON, DC - Numerous cases of EpiPen Price Gouging Shock (EPGS) are sweeping the nation after EpiPen prices continue to be hiked up by...

Medical Emojis Translated for the Masses

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Are you new to medicine?  Or born before 1991?  We have all your medical emojis right here with the translation so you can get...