Joint Commission Cites Itself as a Major Hindrance to Medical Care

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CHICAGO, IL - This past Thursday, the Joint Commission officially cited itself as a major obstacle for patient care and safety.  The Joint Commission released in...
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Why I Became a Hospital Administrator

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After carefully surveying the shifting American healthcare landscape for the past decade, I retired from my increasingly headache filled private practice and said to...
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Doctors and Nurses Fight Back: Proposal to Link Hospital CEO Salaries to Employee Satisfaction...

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CHICAGO, IL – State senators in Illinois voted yesterday 45 to 14 in favor of a new proposal put together by physicians, nurses, and other...
mars

NASA Plans to Build a Skilled Nursing Facility on Mars

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MERRITT ISLAND, FL - Scientists have been planning a human mission to Mars for exploration and habitation for decades.  Successful travel to and habitation of...
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Hospital Introduces ‘American Diet,’ Patient Satisfaction Soars

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LOUISVILLE, KY - Patients and medical staff are abuzz about the University of Louisville Medical Center’s (ULMC) new dietary option: the American diet.  It...

Local Hospital Has New Policy: Ask for Dilaudid, Get Dilaudid, No Questions Asked

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COLUMBUS, OH - A local hospital is trying a new, controversial but more efficient approach to medical care.  “We have changed our guidelines, if you...

Ben Carson: Heart Attack Victims Could Have Survived If They Cathed Own Coronaries

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DETROIT, MI - According to retired neurosurgeon and presidential hopeful Ben Carson, patients who have died due to acute myocardial infarctions or “heart attacks”...
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USPSTF Recommends Against Getting Kicked in the Balls Repeatedly

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BOSTON, MA - In an update of their 2006 recommendation statement, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force (USPSTF) now recommends against getting kicked, smacked,...
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Breaking: Xanax Prescriptions Skyrocket for Election Day

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In breaking news today, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has informed Gomerblog that prescriptions for Xanax and other anxiolytics have...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

New CDC Recommendation: Ignore Patients with Pain > 4

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a new recommendation on the heels of March's "CDC Guideline for...