bone day skeleton bone to pick

Orthopedic Surgeon General Declares Today “National Bone Day”

0
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Orthopedic Surgeon General of the United States Dr. Brock Hammersley has announced he will declare today a national holiday honoring all...

Hospital Debuts Combination Clinic/Pharmacy Drive-Thru

20
RALEIGH, NC - A brand new healthcare system opened in Raleigh last week, as Atlantic Healthcare System (AHS) unveiled its state-of-the-art drive-thru clinic/pharmacy to rave...
virtual runner treadmill

Treadmill Drama: A**Hole Virtual Runner Won’t Move Out of the Way

0
BIRMINGHAM, AL - With a rare opportunity to exercise, third-year surgical resident Jason Mann's excitement to go running on his apartment complex treadmill this...
winter outdoor unit

Hospital Opens New Outdoor Wintertime Med-Surg Unit

0
BIRMINGHAM, AL - This winter season has been historically busy with influenza A wreaking havoc on health care systems, which are filled to the...

NASA: Mars Rover Tests Positive for Coronavirus

0
PASADENA, CA - In breaking news to Gomerblog, NASA has announced that Mars rover Curiosity has tested positive for coronavirus. This is a shock...
colonoscopy

Gastroenterologists Recommend Daily Screening Colonoscopy

0
BETHESDA, MD - In an effort to improve colorectal cancer screening in the United States, where it is the second leading cause of cancer...
Jerome Adams Surgeon General Surgeon Colonel

Surgeon General Turfs Public Health to Hospitalist General

0
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the complex medical comorbidity of our country's citizens, Surgeon General Jerome Adams has turfed the public health to Hospitalist General...

Olympic Hospital Ready to Treat Athletes and Fans From Deadly Brazil

0
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - The 2016 games are predicted to be the most deadly since the 100 AD games when many Christians lost to...
santa electronic record

Santa Uses Electronic Gifts Record and Screws up Bigtime

0
“It has been a disaster,” said Santa while banging his head against the computer monitor screen.  “It has never taken me so long to...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Director Resigns, Becomes CEO of Tobacco Giant Philip Morris

0
ATLANTA, GA - The Director of the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) Brenda Fitzgerald has officially resigned her CDC post to become CEO of tobacco...