insulin

FDA Bans Insulin Amid Reports of Increased Amputations and Other Life Threatening Diseases

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MEMPHIS, TN – The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) announced on Monday that they are pulling insulin off the shelves across the country.  "We...

Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab

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SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out.  Pay was decreasing and vacation...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Recommends Against Any Advice to “Eat Sh*t and Die”

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ATLANTA, GA - Contrary to what that angry dude might have just screamed at you, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention recommends against...

Run-4-the-Cure 5k Fun Run, 3 Runners Shy of Cure

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ATLANTA, GA - The 23rd annual "Race-4-the-Cure Fun Run & Walk" released a statement Monday: "Our annual Fun Run & Walk fell 3 runners short...

Local Jockeys Hired as Flight Nurses to Save on Fuel Costs

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MADISON, WI - Emergency air medical transport & critical care transport company, Lift for Life, has significantly changed their operations.  In an unprecedented move...

Breaking: Man Flu Caused by COVID-19

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BETHESDA, MD - In a major scientific breakthrough, researchers at the National Institute of Health have uncovered that man flu is both real and...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

To Reduce Carbon Dioxide, CDC Recommends Against Exhalation

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ATLANTA, GA - In an effort to help reduce atmospheric carbon dioxide (CO2) levels, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has issued...

Local Hospital Has New Policy: Ask for Dilaudid, Get Dilaudid, No Questions Asked

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COLUMBUS, OH - A local hospital is trying a new, controversial but more efficient approach to medical care.  “We have changed our guidelines, if you...
malpractice court

Doctor Sues Himself After Misdiagnosing His Own Medical Condition

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BOCA RATON, FL - Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram made international headlines for his shocking decision to sue himself after he misdiagnosed his own illness.  "I demand justice for...
drunk texting

Report Recommends Lowering BAC Threshold to 0.05% for Drunk Texting

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to curb regret the morning after, the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine (NASEM) recommends state governments...