Joint Commission Announces Pyramids of Punishment for Patient Safety Violations
CHICAGO, IL - In a recent press release, the Joint Commission (known as JACHO) announced the implementation of a punishment system for health care...
Beef Rib Named Official State Fruit of Texas
LOCKHART, TX - Say goodbye to the Texas red grapefruit as the official state fruit of Texas. Texas legislators will meet later tomorrow in...
That Can’t Be Good: Flu Swab Positive for C. Diff
ATLANTA, GA - In a highly-ominous sign suggesting this year's influenza season may be as bad or even worse than last year's, the Centers...
FDA Rejects Rapid COVID-19 Test in Favor of Slow-as-Balls One
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has rejected the first rapid COVID-19 test that could produce results with an hour in...
Brave MD Sorts Through Inbox of 100,000 COVID-19 Emails
PORTLAND, OR - It goes without saying that every act of bravery in a time of crisis should be recognized. Today Gomerblog wants...
A COVID-19 Miracle: Jesus Turns Water into Hand Sanitizer
BETHLEHEM - Add another miracle to His already impressive resume: Jesus has offered humanity hope in its fight against COVID-19 by turning water into...
BREAKING: U.S. Patient Tests Positive for COVID-19, SARS, MERS, Ebola, Bubonic Plague, Measles, Smallpox,...
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news to Gomerblog, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention has identified a patient who has not only tested...
Lyrics to the Men’s Health Christmas Carol Favorite: “Check Your Balls”
It is the Season of Giving. Don’t put your d*ck in a box to spread that Christmas cheer; instead, consider performing a testicular self-exam....
New AHA CPR Guidelines Introduce “Sensual” Rescue Breaths
DALLAS, TX - In a change of course from recent guidelines which stressed hands on chest-only CPR for bystanders, the American Heart Association (AHA) has...
To Reduce Carbon Dioxide, CDC Recommends Against Exhalation
ATLANTA, GA - In an effort to help reduce atmospheric carbon dioxide (CO2) levels, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has issued...