Gergio Answering Questions

Hospital Gnome Retiring ‘Very Happy with Life’s Work’

0
DALLAS, TX – Gergio, the hospital gnome assigned to Methodist Dallas Medical Center, called it quits on Friday.  Over 20 years of disconnecting patient lines,...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

Confused Michael Flynn Requests Immunity from CDC, Immunizations from Senate Intelligence Committee

0
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Several health care and congressional sources have informed Gomerblog that they believe former National Security Advisor Michael Flynn is very confused and perhaps altered,...

Tips: Is It Allergies or COVID-19?

0
With coronavirus (COVID-19) season starting up and allergy season fresh upon us, we wanted to give you some tips on how to tell the...
Mr. Peanut

Breaking: Mr. Peanut Allergic to Himself

0
PITTSBURGH, PA - Unfortunate news today as the Kraft Heinz Company announced that one of its most beloved mascots, Planters' Mr. Peanut, has been...

Dr. Fauci Implores We All Watch Bob Ross on Infinite Loop Immediately

0
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Addressing a restless and concerned American public over COVID-19, Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious...
ketchup packet

Toddler Goldfish and Ketchup Diet Somehow Working

2
MASSACHUSETTS - A new study just released last week in the journal Nutrition demonstrated that the toddler goldfish and ketchup diet is somehow working; they just...

Physician-Americans to Be Listed in Next U.S. Census as Newest Ethnic Group

2
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The U.S. Census Bureau has just announced that Physician-Americans will be listed as a choice in the 2020 Census survey.  Capitalizing...
blue hospital sign hospital signs

U.S. Hospitals to Close After Patients Test Positive for COVID-19

0
CHICAGO, IL - The NBA suspended its season when its first player tested positive for COVID. American public schools closed when its first...

AMA: Casino Cruise Business ‘In the Works’

0
CHICAGO, IL - The American Medical Association (AMA) was initially formed to represent the interests of physicians and "to promote the art and science of...

Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab

4
SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out.  Pay was decreasing and vacation...