Nigeria Offers Aid to Measles-Plagued United States
NIGERIA - Local Nigerian government officials have released an official statement letting the world know they were grateful for the help the US has provided...
COVID-19 Breakthrough: Redeployed Da Vinci Can Swab One Patient Per Day
BOSTON, MA - In what is already considered the biggest breakthrough against COVID-19 in the United States, surgeons report that Da Vinci robots have...
Secret of Successful Weight Loss Clinic: Tape Worms
CARINGTON, IL - Recent controversy regarding a famous weight loss clinic, Let’s Knock It Off!, has the media in a buzz. Let’s Knock It Off! has been...
Breaking: Scott Pruitt Leaves EPA to Join Hospital Ethics Committee
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Donald J. Trump announced over Twitter this afternoon that Scott Pruitt will be leaving his leadership role as Administrator of...
Search-and-Rescue Spots Man’s Penis Under Fourth Panniculus
CHICAGO, IL - Gomerblog has some exciting news to report: 59-year-old Fred Turntable is crying tears of joy this morning after he was reunited...
Meteorologists Developing Radars to Detect Black Clouds, White Clouds
ATLANTA, GA - In a new strategic partnership with Emory University, meteorologists at The Weather Channel (TWC) has pledged to push the boundaries of...
Hospital with Low Survivability Submits Plans for New Employee Draft
DELAWARE - Recent published reports state morbidity and mortality rates are absolutely atrocious for Community Hospital. According to the US News & World ratings...
Pneumatic Tube System for Patient Transport a Huge Success
ROCHESTER, MN - One month into its experimental trial run, the Mayo Clinic made an announcement today that the implementation of a pneumatic tube...
Breaking: Xanax Prescriptions Skyrocket for Election Day
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In breaking news today, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has informed Gomerblog that prescriptions for Xanax and other anxiolytics have...
Oh No! The House Just Repealed Obama’s Care, Now Barack Obama Doesn’t Have Health...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The House of Representatives just passed the repeal of Obama's Care. Now it is impossible for Barack Obama to have health coverage....