Super Bowl LI shootout

Houston Trauma Teams Prepare for Deadly Super Bowl Shootout

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HOUSTON, TX - Emergency crews and trauma teams in the Houston area are nervous but ready for Sunday night, as experts are expecting a...
Batman Histoplasmosis

Breaking: Batman Diagnosed with COVID-19

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GOTHAM CITY - Less than two years after he was hospitalized for pulmonary histoplasmosis, Batman has bounced back to Gotham City Medical Center...

Disgusting! This Patient’s Cranial Nerves Were Grossly Intact

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When you didn't think medicine could deliver any more heebie-jeebies, this clinic just received a large, overnight shipment of them.  Last week, per the...
miss universal healthcare

Miss Management Crowned Miss Universal Healthcare

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BOSTON, MA - Miss Management of Hospital Administration has been crowned Miss Universal Healthcare, beating out Miss Hap of General Surgery, Miss Understanding of...

Medical Meth to Increase Tax, Dental Revenue

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JAY, FL - Not since legalized marijuana increased Colorado's Revenues and Frito Lay's profits, has a drug’s side effects so quickly boosted another profession’s revenue....
paper cuts

ERs Overwhelmed by Life-Threatening, Wrapping Paper-Related Paper Cuts

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EVERYWHERE, UNITED STATES - What should be a Christmas morning filled with celebration and cheer has turned to horror and bloodshed: life-threatening wrapping paper-related...

Doctor Excited to Get New, Last Year’s People Magazine for Waiting Room

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NAPERVILLE, IL - Dr. Nyugen's waiting room will be packed when word gets out they have the country's most-recent People magazine.  "I'm trying it...
Tom Price

Breaking: Tom Price Signs Off, Turfs Department of Health & Human Services to Medicine

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - After dealing with scandal over the use of private jets for multiple government business trips, orthopedic surgeon Tom Price has signed...
Sudoku

COVID-19: Self-Quarantined Anesthesiologist Running Dangerously Low on Sudoku Supplies

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - An area anesthesiologist who is currently 3 days into his 14-day self-imposed quarantine behind a drape fort is unusually anxious and...

Actors Who Played TV Doctors Offered Honorary Medical Degrees, Can’t Afford Them

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BOSTON, MA - Esteemed actors Hugh Laurie (House, M.D.), Zach Braff (Scrubs), and George Clooney (ER), known for their masterful portrayals of physicians on...