Placebo Gene Discovered, Thousands of Studies Invalid
CLEVELAND, OH – In what many are describing as the biggest biology discovery since DNA’s double helix, researchers have discovered the placebo gene.
A team...
New CMS Regulations Force Doctors to Literally Jump Through Hoops
TACOMA, WA - Stipulations released last month by the Center for Medicare Services have added on to the already onerous documentation requirements necessary for...
CDC: Inhale Lysol Before, After Every COVID-19 Encounter
ATLANTA, GA - Based on recent review of the available evidence, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) strongly recommends inhaling Lysol before...
Local Mom Decides Against New Brake Pads
MICHIGAN - Local mom, Jennifer Leeders, brought in her Acura MDX for its annual maintenance. Her mechanic recommended new brake pads, a routine recommendation....
New Journal of Negative Studies Announced
BOSTON, MA - The medical community is abuzz today with the announcement of the new Journal of Negative Studies. The journal, which will focus...
Lion King Remake to Include Mufasa’s Prolonged ICU Admission and Futile Care Prior to...
ANAHEIM, CA - Disney studios has announced that the remake of the Lion King, slated to be released in mid-2019, will feature a more...
Run-4-the-Cure 5k Fun Run, 3 Runners Shy of Cure
ATLANTA, GA - The 23rd annual "Race-4-the-Cure Fun Run & Walk" released a statement Monday: "Our annual Fun Run & Walk fell 3 runners short...
COVID-19 Study: Bandanas Superior to N95s, Surgical Masks for PPE
BOSTON, MA - Good news, healthcare workers: A study published in the New England Journal of PPE has found that bandanas are superior to...
Dr. Fauci Implores We All Watch Bob Ross on Infinite Loop Immediately
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Addressing a restless and concerned American public over COVID-19, Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious...
Nation Washes Hands for the First Time
NASHVILLE, TN - The coronavirus from Wuhan, China is a global pandemic. People are terrified. Hoarding toilet paper, cleaning out grocery stores, and now...