Nation’s Doctors Experiencing Intractable Nausea & Vomiting Due to House-Passed Health Care Bill

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WASHINGTON, DC - Gomerblog reports that our nation's doctors have been experiencing intractable nausea and vomiting coupled with stomach upset immediately after the narrow passage...
Hurrican JCAHO

Breaking: Hurricane JCAHO to Obliterate All Open Beverage Containers in Its Path

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CAPE VERDE - The National Hurricane Center has detected the most powerful hurricane just yet.  Named Hurricane JCAHO, the projected Category 5 Cape Verde...
brain biopsy

FIFA Requiring “Soccer Biter” to Have Brain Biopsy to Look for Rabies

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BRAZIL - In a stunning announcement today, FIFA officials will require Luis Suarez, the Uruguayan soccer player who bit Italy’s Giorgio Chiellini in the...

FDA Approves of the Administration of Food & Drugs

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing numerous benefits such as satiating hunger, prolonging life, and treating diseases, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) unanimously approved of...
hypertension guidelines

Labile Guidelines: ACC/AHA Hypertension Cutoff Now 180/100

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Last month, several societies including the American College of Cardiology (ACC) and American Heart Association (AHA) redefined hypertension as greater than...
heparin bridge 85

I-85 in Atlanta is Finally Therapeutic, Heparin Bridge D/C’d

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ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog is excited to report that I-85 in Atlanta, which collapsed 6 weeks ago for reasons that can likely be blamed...

“Bieber Fever” Determined to Be Neurosyphilis

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CAMBRIDGE, MA – Scientists have been investigating an outbreak that has been sweeping over the world the past several years that has been coined...
door knob

New Recommendations for Flu Vaccination: ‘Lick a Knob’ Campaign

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DES PLAINES, IL - Doctors in northwest Illinois have a new method to help older adults stave off illness during the upcoming flu season. Dr....

Secret of Successful Weight Loss Clinic: Tape Worms

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CARINGTON, IL - Recent controversy regarding a famous weight loss clinic, Let’s Knock It Off!, has the media in a buzz.  Let’s Knock It Off! has been...

A Breakup Letter to the Z-Pack

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Dear Z-Pack, We’ve had a good run together. But, my dearest azithromycin, it is time for us to end our love affair. It’s not you....