pens

CDC Recommends Against Loaning Out Your Pen if Someone Asks for It

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ATLANTA, GA - Lost amidst the opioid and obesity crises over the past few years, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Confirms ‘Something Going Around’

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ATLANTA, GA – In a recent press briefing, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention confirmed reports that something has been going around.  Constance Bentley,...

Qdoba Offering Free Hepatitis to Compete with Chipotle

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LAKEWOOD, CO - Despite Chipotle’s recent infectious debacles, it still has maintained the loyal support of its hardcore fanbase, who are easily willing to...
Chart of Death

Coroner Cause of Death: ‘Physical Therapy Note Missing Date and Time’

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ALBUQUERQUE, NM - GomerBlog regretfully reports on a hospital death that could have been saved if the physical therapy note was dated and timed...

Hospitals Now Offering Official Sponsorship

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DENVER, CO - Historically hospitals have struggled to stay afloat, and have strived to maintain adequate staffing.  Looking for answers, hospital administrators of St. Mary’s Hospital...
Cookie Monster Sexy Bod

Looking Hot! Cookie Monster Shows Off New Sexy Bod After Trading in Cookies for...

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JUST WEST OF SESAME STREET - Holy sexiness, Batman!  So much has been happening in the news recently that it's hard to lose sight...

A Breakup Letter to the Z-Pack

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Dear Z-Pack, We’ve had a good run together. But, my dearest azithromycin, it is time for us to end our love affair. It’s not you....

10 Photos From the 2017 American Diabetes Association Conference They Don’t Want You to...

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The American Diabetes Association (ADA) was relentlessly mocked on Twitter over the weekend for asking conference attendees to remove any tweets that contain photography...

Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law...

Archaeologist: Ancient Group Claimed Drinking Clean Water Caused Diarrhea

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A landmark discovery in southern France occurred this Saturday: scientists uncovered a series of caves that may have been inhabited by humans over 15,000 years...