Miss Management Crowned Miss Universal Healthcare
BOSTON, MA - Miss Management of Hospital Administration has been crowned Miss Universal Healthcare, beating out Miss Hap of General Surgery, Miss Understanding of...
Wilderness Medicine Residency Approved by ACGME, Offers to Pay Trainees in Pine Cones
BURLINGTON, VT - Enter the profession of wilderness medicine – every closeted survivalist’s dream come true and a quaint throwback to an era where it was...
Bovie Electrocautery Receives FDA Approval for Cutting Red Tape
SILVER SPRING, MD - In an unprecedented move by the Food & Drug Administration (FDA), Bovie electrocautery has been approved for both incisional and excisional...
FIFA Requiring “Soccer Biter” to Have Brain Biopsy to Look for Rabies
BRAZIL - In a stunning announcement today, FIFA officials will require Luis Suarez, the Uruguayan soccer player who bit Italy’s Giorgio Chiellini in the...
Bernie Sanders’ Hernia Likely Caused by Strain of Attempting to Lift Up Middle Class
WASHINGTON, D.C. – A source close to the colorectal surgeon who treated Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders for an abdominal hernia this week said...
U.S. on COVID-19: “Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, You’re My Only Hope”
TATOOINE - While cleaning his new R2-D2 droid after purchasing them from the Jawas, Luke Skywalker accidentally triggered a holographic recording of a desperate...
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer, Remains in Critical Condition
OUTSIDE IN THE SNOW SOMEWHERE - GomerBlog is sad to report that Grandma was “found down” 3 days before Christmas during potential Santa Claus test...
Pharmacy No Longer Accepting Scripts Written in Crayon, Dr. Muppet: ‘Me Angry!’
ORLANDO, FL – The outpatient pharmacy at Orlando Regional Medical Center (ORMC) has issued a hospital-wide memo Monday that they will stop accepting prescription...
Doctor Sues Himself After Misdiagnosing His Own Medical Condition
BOCA RATON, FL - Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram made international headlines for his shocking decision to sue himself after he misdiagnosed his own illness. "I demand justice for...
Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies
ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency." They are coming off of...