Newly Promoted General Surgeon’s Business Cards, A Little Too True
LOS ANGELES, CA – UCLA’s newly promoted general surgeon, Assistant Professor William Heffner, just received his updated business cards today. An unfortunate error in spacing caused much controversy. Due to the lack of room...
Resident Fails Rotation for Forgetting to Place TPN Orders by 10 AM
MIAMI, FL - Mercy Hospital made a decision to fail Dr. Andy Oppenheimer yesterday after he once again forgot to put total parenteral nutrition (TPN) orders in by 10 AM. The parenteral nutrition patients on his...
Intern Excited to Take Care of Cobra Kai, Because They Never Die
SAN DIEGO, CA - Herb Swanson has started his internship year off on a bad foot. "I had 3 patients die on me in July, not a good way to start my career."
Dr. Swanson...
Internal Medicine Resident Calls Rheumatology Fellow In at 2:00 AM for Fibromyalgia Patient “Fibro...
KANSAS CITY, KS - “I was just tired of dealing with her,” internal medicine resident Dr. Kara Gifford said. “She is allergic to every pain medication except Dilaudid; in fact she has 15 allergies!”
It was...
Doctor Actually Thinks He Is Saving Lives
WORCESTER, MA - Dr. Danny Trenda, a recent Tufts University Medical School graduate, told friends at Tony’s Tavern that he was saving lives. His friends, unimpressed, ordered another round. Dr. Trenda went on to talk...
The Tale of the Enema and the Trailing Zero Error
LUBBOCK, TX - The Institute of Medicine in 1999 shocked the world when they reported that up to 100,00 persons die each year due to medical errors. Medical practices were changed and procedures modified...
Laboratory Technician Decides to Delay ‘Stat’ Blood Test Result Due to Excessive Pestering
INDIANA – Today a laboratory technician at Holy Cross Hospital decided enough was enough and took matters into his own hands. At 5:42 a.m. a STAT complete blood count (CBC) was ordered on a...
Newly-Diagnosed One-Handed Man: Totally Worth it
CUMMING, GA – Doctors on Saturday struggled to find out why patient Robert Shaffer lost his hand. Dr. Virginia Sullivan, an intern on the team, told reporters: "We asked Robert what happened, but he...
Ophthalmology Resident Quits Due to Ommetaphobia
MIAMI, FL - Dr. Henry Flickheimer, an ophthalmology resident, has struggled and coped with a certain intense fear for years. Surprisingly, that fear is the fear of touching or looking at eyeballs, otherwise called ommetaphobia.
“It just...
Urology Resident Leaves Husband After Sizing Up the Competition
WHITE PLAINS, NY - Unfortunately we have to report on another sad tale of how graduate medical education can take a toll on families. It seems that Dr. Sylvia Smythe, a first-year urology resident, has filed for...
