African child

MAUN, BOTSWANA – A desperately impoverished 6-year-old boy in Sub-Saharan Africa lacks the access to medical care which could properly diagnose his “Marker Negative Mixed-Connective Tissue Disorder” (MNMCTD).

African childBaruti Bakone spends most of his days scavenging for food and potable water, falsely believing that adequate hydration and nutrition would remedy his fatigue, malaise, depression, and muscle aches.

Little does he know that there are scores of American “doctors” and naturopaths who could offer insight into the real cause of his suffering. MNMCTD is a new scourge in the US, afflicting thousands of patients and generating vast amounts of revenue for practitioners.  Typically, MNMCTD is diagnosed in patients with months to years of fatigue, depression, and diffuse pain who have repeatedly had negative lab and imaging tests.  In most cases, MNMCTD is treated with expensive, new-generation medications.

Pfisher CEO Rich Slimecash, MBA, offered his comments to GomerBlog.  “It’s such a tragedy that access to healthcare in many areas of the world is so dismal.  Getting Lyrica to poverty stricken far corners of the globe is also prohibitively expensive.  Patients like Baruti need to have a scientific-sounding name for why they feel so poorly and they need the proper treatment for their condition.  For just hundreds of dollars per day, you too could help patients like Baruti feel better.  Send your donations directly to us at Pfisher, and we will take care of the rest.  We accept all major credit cards, personal checks, PayPal, and Bitcoin.  No gift is too small, but bigger is better.”

  • Jake Ho

    After 10 years spent fighting the unwinnable war that is Emergency Medicine in America, an "ER doctor" left medicine altogether and joined a Buddhist temple in Tibet, changing his name to "Jake Ho." He found the peaceful solitude he achieved to be the antithesis of years spent dealing with unreasonable requests and reprimands from patients, families, hospital administrators, and consultants. The vows of celibacy and silence he took are largely mitigated by the blogging and internet porn made possible thanks to the temple's excellent Wi-Fi connection.

  • Show Comments