Apple to Introduce New Surgical Gown 7 with No Sleeves

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CUPERTINO, CAApple Medical just announced their new line of OR gear for the new year: iSurgicalGown 7.  This new line takes a sharp turn from their old model by the elimination of sleeves. iscrubs

“This is really a medical breakthrough for everyone,” CEO Tim Cook told a room full of surgeons and surgical techs.  You never again have to worry about those sleeves restricting you while you operate.”


Sleeves on surgical gowns are the most common source of contamination.  Usually occurs by brushing up something not on the field.  This new line hopes to eliminate that especially with medical students.

“Typically a surgeon, or let’s be honest a medical student, with brush their sleeve against the circulator or the side of the operating table, now you don’t have to worry about this anymore!”

The crowd cheered.  “We’ve been waiting for this for years!  No more medical students to contaminate my field!” said Dr. Rasmussen, a professor at the University of Iowa.  Another surgeon was just ecstatic, Dr. Julie Smith, “It’s true those sleeves are always getting my way!”

With all new Apple products there was some push back, especially from the OB/GYN crowd.  “Who will retract the bladder now?”

“Hey if it limits medical students from closing I’m all for that!” said anesthesiologist Dr. Ben Fricks who was live-streaming the event from the OR.

Fresh on their successful elimination streak Apple plans to eliminate their EKG leads from their 12-lead EKG machines next spring.

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