CAMBRIDGE, MA – Homeopathic physicians in Cambridge have discovered a revolutionary new method that’s the secret to shedding a quarter of your body weight and becoming a healthier you in just 10 days.
Watch this shocking video above and discover how YOU can rapidly slim down, tone up, fix your child’s latest bout of whooping cough, treat your other child’s outbreak of measles, mumps, and rubella, repair your car’s broken radiator, REALLY understand Bitcoin, communicate with extraterrestrial beings, and cure every form of cancer ever. All using this one unbelievable, all-natural, 98% effective treatment that the doctors don’t want you to know about.
Yes, those pesky doctors who’ve studied how to keep the human body alive for 8 – 12 years so they can “kill you with their quack Big Pharma remedies”, like pencillin.
So grab your amethyst resonance pendant or lead bracelet, check whether Mars is in retrograde, and start ridding yourself of bad delta waves by talking to your nearest homeopathic physician today about how they can best prey upon your distrust of authority to sell you 100% organic remedies that will induce a placebo effect at best or a stress ulcer in the doctor who finally sees you at worst. Remember: water has memory, minerals and probiotics are the cure to every disease, and dihydrogen monoxide is huge chemical conspiracy to kill us all.