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Scientists discover that the novel Corona virus is more of a prick than they had originally thought. It’s viral machinery, although devoid of any identifiable “nervous tissue” or “brain” has apparently developed the ability to plot the demise of humankind.

Patterns have emerged among lab specimens that indicate that the virus, when considered as individuals, are not that remarkable. However, when in groups, they collaborate, plot, and overall, act like assholes. Although no centralized brain among individuals has been identified, the pattern of behavior infers an ability to consciously plan the timing of their mutations.

Virologist Clayton Peters spoke with reporters on Tuesday. “It appears that they these individual viruses behave much like other viruses. They hijack the machinery in our human cells, and use it to proliferate more copies of themselves. However, recent research has uncovered that the novel Coronavirus is actually consciously waiting to mutate until we have developed a vaccine”.

The cantankerous nature of this virus will render the human race extinct in a matter of a couple years. This will inevitably lead to the demise of all human kind. The end of life as we know it is upon us in more ways than one. Experts suggest that humans should immediately repent all of their sins and atone for their wrongdoings before this jerk of a virus takes us out.

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