Phillips to Introduce Monitor that Only Alarms
DALLAS, TX - Today Phillips unveiled their mew monitor: Alarmtron 3000. This new monitor is the next step in evolution from the previous generation...
Local Man Relieved He Was Able to Yell at His Surgeon Just Before Going...
HERSHEY, PA – Early reports are coming in that local man, Frank Demmer, chewed out his surgeon in pre-operative bay five. "I’m just happy...
Anesthesia Techs Strike; Anesthesiologists Forced to Go Get Their Own Quarters
HUNTSVILLE, AL - In the midst of a contentious labor dispute, anesthesia techs at Huntsville General Hospital have gone on strike. Amongst the many...
What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 1
Initial consult notes usually end with the following line: Thank you for the interesting consult. What does that really mean? In the first of...
Anesthesiologist General Requests Senate Democrats Continue to Perform all Presidential Blocks
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a move sure to frustrate the President, Anesthesiologist General Dr. Jerome Adams has decided that he will not perform any...
Breaking: Surgeon Asks Anesthesia to Lower His Tray Table
DELTA 291 - Citing numerous reasons why he couldn't perform the maneuver by himself, passenger and general surgeon Richard Patton has asked Anesthesia to lower his tray table...
Vital Signs Much Worse After Implementing Anesthesia Automatic Electronic Records
BOSTON, MA - Huge swings in vital sign monitoring have some anesthesiologists and hospital administrators wondering how new automatic electronic records programs could be causing patient’s vitals...
Santa Claus Aspirates Milk, Cookies after Ignoring NPO Guidelines
NORTH POLE, SOMEWHERE BETWEEN SIBERIA & ALASKA - Christmas has been canceled as Santa Claus fights for his life in the ICU. Thankfully he...
Anesthesiologist Admits He Irons His Drapes Before Every Case
ATLANTA, GA - Anyone who has ever worked in an Atlanta Medical Center operating room (OR) with anesthesiologist Rick Rickson notices the same thing:...