Conrad Murray Hired Promoting Exclusive Anesthesia Use for Propofol
HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Conrad Murray, a smooth criminal, has been released from jail following his two-year sentence for the death of Michael Jackson. He has been unable to...
New “Code 7/19” Intubation Protocol Keeps Day Nurse Around to Finish Sstorm He Started
The time is 1859 and pagers throughout the ICU begin to chirp. It’s time: Tube O’clock. This simple and easy protocol was designed to...
Mom Still Cleaning Up After Surgeon Son
NAPLES, FL - A recent phenomenon in an operating room (OR) at Mary Mother Hospital has caught quite the buzz. Dr. Roger Messi was...
AANA: ‘Despite Having Much Less Training CRNAs Also Equivalent to Neurosurgeons, Fighter Pilots, and...
PARK RIDGE, IL - The American Association of Nurse Anesthetists (AANA) ruffled a lot of feathers and raised a lot of logical thinking...
Anesthesia Completes Construction of Epic OR Drape Fort
ATLANTA, GA - After almost a year in the works, Anesthesia is excited to announce the completion of what is likely the world's most...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the...
Anesthesiologist Sworn in as Surgeon General, Immediately Goes on Break
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Shortly after being sworn in as the nation’s 20th Surgeon General, anesthesiologist Jerome Adams announced that he was going on break....
Anesthesiologist Swallows Pride, Develops Small Bowel Obstruction
TUCSON, AZ – According to local witnesses, Mercy Hospital anesthesiologist Henry Stutzman developed a complete small bowel obstruction hours after swallowing his pride in operating...
Respiratory Therapist Tom Brady Fired for Underinflating ET Tubes
BOSTON, MA – Tom Brady, a veteran respiratory therapist at Foxboro Hospital, was fired yesterday as he was caught by an eyewitness underinflating endotracheal (ET)...
Breaking: VA Pick Ronny Jackson Withdraws from Both Nomination, Opioids
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the "baseless and anonymous attacks on my character" as well as intractable abdominal cramps, lacrimation, and rhinorrhea, White House physician Rear...