Anesthesiology

Judas blames Anesthesia

Judas Blames Betrayal of Jesus on Anesthesia

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JERUSALEM - Judas Iscariot, who notoriously betrayed Jesus for thirty pieces of silver, has absolved himself from one of the darkest moments in the Bible by...
dermabond surgical glue

Dermabond Repackages for a Sexier Product

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Dermabond, a skin glue widely used for surgical skin closure, has had a recent falloff in use as hospitals push cost-conscious practices.  In response,...
incentive spirometer incentivized spirometer

New Incentivized Spirometers to Pay $50 Per Deep Breath

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ATLANTA, GA – In an effort to better encourage patients to do their breathing exercises, a newly-designed incentivized spirometer will pay patients $50 per...
couple kissing

Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor

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Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom. Emergency Medicine Go skydiving to get the...
main or

Norovirus and a Patient’s Oxygen Saturation of 33% Too Much for Anesthesiologist to Handle

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BOSTON, MA - Norovirus is running rampant throughout the country this January and anesthesiologist Tim Bellows became the next poor victim to become infected. ...
CPR

CPR Guidelines Made Even Simpler

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Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation was replaced by only chest compression in 2008 after a slow de-emphasis on replacement breathing.  This made CPR simple and easy to remember,...
respiratory ventilator attachment

New Ventilator Attachment Safely Allows Smoking While Receiving Oxygen

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CHARLOTTE, NC - Bronco Products, Inc. is pleased to announce its revolutionary new ventilation product.  PapPal is an amazingly simple device that allows those...

Curare Darts Phased Out Despite Drug Shortages

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MACON, GA - Like many medical centers, St. Joseph the Protector Hospital is experiencing severe drug shortages, especially in the operating room.  The latest unobtainable...
santa claus stuck

Santa Claus In Serious Condition After Chimney Incident & Sleep Apnea Complications

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THE NORTH POLE - GomerBlog can confirm that Santa Claus is recovering, but remains in serious condition, at North Pole Community Hospital after an incident when...