Cardiothoracic Surgeon Hoping He Didn’t Leave Wallet in Guy’s Aorta
NEW YORK, NY - As cardiothoracic surgeon Timothy Carter sews his patient's sternum closed after successful repair of an ascending aortic aneurysm, he can't help...
ASA Updates Algorithm to Account for Redheads
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) released new guidelines that update their infamous ASA classification system to account for the anesthetic...
Anesthesiologists Now Offering Tap from a Ball-Peen Hammer as Natural Option for Sedation
Under pressure from the Natural Medicine movement, the American Society of Anesthesiologists have discovered a "natural" and "drug-free" approach toward preparing a patient for...
Spare Anesthesia Machine Makes Slushies
SANTE FE, NM - Dr. Brad Jacks suspected it for months. Anesthesia personnel would leave for a break in the middle of a quick ear...
Anesthesia Makes Surgical Recommendations
In a world flip-turned upside down, anesthesia has had enough and is making recommendations on how to do surgery.
During a hernia surgery: “Oh, you’re...
Hillary Clinton Blames Benghazi on Anesthesia
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Last week former Secretary of State and self-presumed next president Hillary Clinton, testified before Congress about the Benghazi Tragedy in 2012....
Surgery is Delayed Due to Lack of “Time In” After Time Out
SAN JOSE, CA - OR 12 experienced a three-hour delay for what was supposed to be a 7 am start on a Tuesday morning...
Unable to Resist, Anesthesia Places Drape Between First Class, Coach
DELTA 2350 - Unable to resist the temptation any longer, passenger and anesthesiologist Ryan Grossman delved into his carry-on bag, took out a freshly-pressed...
Joint Commission is Coming: Hospital to Change Everything for Three Days Then Revert to...
EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital administrators have finally cracked the secret to passing the highly-dreaded Joint Commission inspections. For decades, the Joint Commission (JC) or...