Anesthesiology

OR Case Canceled Due to No Remaining Time Outs

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The first case of the day at Saint Methodist Maplewood hospital was canceled due to no remaining time outs prior to incision. Circulator, Renee Count...
intubation teeth

Med Student Knocks Out 30 Teeth Attempting to Intubate Patient, Intern Gets the 7-10...

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TUSKEGEE, AL – In an unprecedented display of disregard for dentition, MS4 Gunner McDeebag managed to knock out all but two of a patient’s...
border drape wall

Trump: Anesthesiology Will Build Border Drape Wall & Pay for It

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Publicly acknowledging that efforts to build a border wall and have Mexico pay for it has failed, President Donald Trump has...
food

Texas Execution Delayed Due to Inmate’s NPO Status

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DALLAS, TX – For the third time this week a Texas execution was canceled due to the prison inmate #474901’s NPO status.  "Someone’s got...

Product Review: Heartbeats by Dr. Dre Stethoscopes

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Pros / The bass on these Heartbeats by Dr. Dre stethoscopes are SICK!  Besides, who wouldn't want a bluetooth stethoscope blessed by Dr. Dre? Cons / You...

Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’

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CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine...

Medical Specialties as Disney Characters

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Anesthesia - Rafiki from The Lion King. Most of the rest of us have no clue what the hell you are doing with all...
anesthesiologist hospital

Hospital Replaces Anesthesiologists with Voice-Activated OR Tables, Saves Millions

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SAN JOSE, CA - In what appears to be a medical first, surgeons at Methodist Northwest Hospital have found that using voice-activated operating room...
npo guidelines acute pulmonary embolism

Santa Claus Aspirates Milk, Cookies after Ignoring NPO Guidelines

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NORTH POLE, SOMEWHERE BETWEEN SIBERIA & ALASKA - Christmas has been canceled as Santa Claus fights for his life in the ICU.  Thankfully he...