Narc Madness
It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4! This year...
ICU Team Develops Defibrillator With New Setting: The Slow Code Mode
PHOENIX, AZ - Luck of the Lady Hospital in Arizona has begun to trial a defibrillator developed by a few of its seasoned staff,...
Santa Claus Aspirates Milk, Cookies after Ignoring NPO Guidelines
NORTH POLE, SOMEWHERE BETWEEN SIBERIA & ALASKA - Christmas has been canceled as Santa Claus fights for his life in the ICU. Thankfully he...
Tips: How to Perform a Spinal Tap on a Moving Train
I have to admit: spinal taps (lumbar punctures) are not one of my favorite procedures to perform. I’m fairly certain our patients don’t enjoy...
Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor
Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom.
Emergency Medicine
Go skydiving to get the...
Study Shows More Studies Would Be Needed to Study Future Results
BETHESDA, MD – A recent article published in the New England Journal of Medicine discovered that more studies would be needed to study future results....
Anesthesiologist General Won’t Stop Asking President How Much Time He Has Left
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Trump is growing impatient with the new Anesthesiologist General continually asking him how much time is left in his presidency.
Surgeon/Anesthesiologist General...
Jesus Christ Himself Scheduled to Perform Miracle, Patient Furious with being NPO
Mr. Jacobs’ primary team was thrilled when their hospital operator was finally able to get through to Jesus Christ regarding the miracle they were...
OR Fires Increase as New Regulations are Enforced
Surgical suites across the nation are ablaze this week as rumors of a newly-formed Joint Commission task force has all parties involved sweating in...