Anesthesiology

santa big

Santa Sporting Trim New Figure After Successful Gastric Bypass

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NORTH POLE, CANADA - Reports are coming in from all over the North Pole that Santa Claus is sporting a svelte new physique this Christmas...
Meu

Breaking: Robert Mueller Indicts Anesthesia

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GOMERBLOG HQ - The first charges arising from special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation has been approved by a federal grand jury in Washington, D.C.,...
wallet aorta

Cardiothoracic Surgeon Hoping He Didn’t Leave Wallet in Guy’s Aorta

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NEW YORK, NY - As cardiothoracic surgeon Timothy Carter sews his patient's sternum closed after successful repair of an ascending aortic aneurysm, he can't help...

Anesthesiologists Now Offering Tap from a Ball-Peen Hammer as Natural Option for Sedation

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Under pressure from the Natural Medicine movement, the American Society of Anesthesiologists have discovered a "natural" and "drug-free" approach toward preparing a patient for...
Smug Anesthesiologist blames everybody

Anesthesiologist Correctly Identifies Anatomic Structure During Surgery

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SPRINGVILLE, VA – Local part-time anesthesiologist and full-time crossword puzzle enthusiast Arnold Preston, M.D. shocked the entire operating suite today when he correctly identified...
anesthesiologist hospital

Hospital Replaces Anesthesiologists with Voice-Activated OR Tables, Saves Millions

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SAN JOSE, CA - In what appears to be a medical first, surgeons at Methodist Northwest Hospital have found that using voice-activated operating room...

Surgeon Passes Out Following OR Fentanyl Exposure, Remainder of OR Staff Unaffected

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BOSTON, MA – 94 minutes into what was a routine total knee arthroplasty, Dr. James Nairbear suddenly felt lightheaded and fell backwards landing in...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Bored Anesthesiologist Randomly Intubating Patients on Floor

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HOUSTON, TX - Finding it to be a particularly slow day in the operating room today, bored anesthesiologist Lee Maxwell has been spotted running around Houston Medical Center,...
surgeon general

Anesthesiologist General Won’t Stop Asking President How Much Time He Has Left

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Trump is growing impatient with the new Anesthesiologist General continually asking him how much time is left in his presidency. Surgeon/Anesthesiologist General...
drape fort iron drapes

Anesthesia Completes Construction of Epic OR Drape Fort

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ATLANTA, GA - After almost a year in the works, Anesthesia is excited to announce the completion of what is likely the world's most...