Anesthesiology

fires

OR Fires Increase as New Regulations are Enforced

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Surgical suites across the nation are ablaze this week as rumors of a newly-formed Joint Commission task force has all parties involved sweating in...

Doula Organization Claims Medical Legitimacy

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SAN DIEGO, CA - Craig Hartford, spokesman for the Doula Association of Southern California (DASC), released a statement last week claiming that doulas had at...

Anesthesia Makes Surgical Recommendations

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In a world flip-turned upside down, anesthesia has had enough and is making recommendations on how to do surgery. During a hernia surgery: “Oh, you’re...
Peakaboo

Anesthesiologist Behind Drape Plays Peakaboo with Surgeon

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NORFOLK, VA - Anesthesiologist and master entertainer Thomas Kingston couldn't believe he forgot his handmade puppets for his usual daily puppet show to entertain...

Anesthesiologist, Tired of Intubating in Era of COVID, Decides to Perform CABG Under...

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New York, NY - The era of COVID-19 has pushed the envelope in hospitals across the world, challenging care delivery models and allowing one...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Anesthesiologists Wish Patients Could Intubate Themselves Once in a While

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MONTREAL, QUEBEC - Tired of looking after every airway in this world, anesthesiologists admit they occasionally wish patients wouldn't be so lazy and unmotivated, and...

Surgeon General to Reverse Opioid Epidemic with Whopping Dose of Narcan

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Acting Surgeon General Sylvia Trent-Adams has unveiled a new strategy against the nation's opioid epidemic, and it simply involves giving the...
types of beards

New Beard Policy Being Adopted at Many Hospitals in OR Clothing Algorithm

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Dear Hospital Employees, The following beard policy is being put into effect for your entire hospital.  This includes parking areas, food courts, and adjacent land.  We...
anesthesia patient

National Security of Anesthesiologists Releases New Cell Phone Disabling Device

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RESTON, VA - The National Security of Anesthesiologists (NSA), in response to a jury awarding a patient $500,000 after an anesthesiologist was caught on...

Breaking News: Surgery Accepts Blame

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For the first time in recorded history, anesthesia blamed surgery for a poor case, and surgery accepted blame. “We took this guy back for a...