Anesthesiology

Judas blames Anesthesia

Judas Blames Betrayal of Jesus on Anesthesia

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JERUSALEM - Judas Iscariot, who notoriously betrayed Jesus for thirty pieces of silver, has absolved himself from one of the darkest moments in the Bible by...

Breaking: Surgeon Asks Anesthesia to Lower His Tray Table

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DELTA 291 - Citing numerous reasons why he couldn't perform the maneuver by himself, passenger and general surgeon Richard Patton has asked Anesthesia to lower his tray table...
Pyxis machine broken glass

Pyxis Machine Dispenses Broken Glass Dilaudid Ampule, Laughs on the Inside

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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - GomerBlog brings breaking news regarding those fragile glass fentanyl and Dilaudid ampules in the Pyxis machine.  Apparently the machine enjoys dispensing medications with a...

Anesthesiologist, Tired of Intubating in Era of COVID, Decides to Perform CABG Under...

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New York, NY - The era of COVID-19 has pushed the envelope in hospitals across the world, challenging care delivery models and allowing one...
CRNA taking a break

CRNA Sets Record by Taking a Break While On Break

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BALTIMORE, MD - Nurse anesthetist Megan Poole, a veteran CRNA at Johns Hopkins University, set a new record on Tuesday morning by taking a break...
types of beards

New Beard Policy Being Adopted at Many Hospitals in OR Clothing Algorithm

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Dear Hospital Employees, The following beard policy is being put into effect for your entire hospital.  This includes parking areas, food courts, and adjacent land.  We...

Dermatology Recommends Arctic Winter to Minimize Sun Exposure

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ROSEMONT, IL - Continuing its campaign against arch nemesis, the Sun, the American Academy of Dermatology (AAD) has issued a new recommendation stating not...
intubation teeth

Med Student Knocks Out 30 Teeth Attempting to Intubate Patient, Intern Gets the 7-10...

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TUSKEGEE, AL – In an unprecedented display of disregard for dentition, MS4 Gunner McDeebag managed to knock out all but two of a patient’s...

Sick of Scrub Machine Malfunctions Resident Gets Scrubs Tattooed on Body

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CALIFORNIA CITY, CA - Jonathan Marconi, an anesthesia resident at the world-famous University of California at University of California (UCUC) Medical Center, had become...
surgeon general

Anesthesiologist General Won’t Stop Asking President How Much Time He Has Left

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Trump is growing impatient with the new Anesthesiologist General continually asking him how much time is left in his presidency. Surgeon/Anesthesiologist General...