New ACS Recommendations for CRC Screening Forces Anesthesia to Bear the Burden of Providing...
On May 30, 2018, the American Cancer Society announced that it will be updating its colorectal cancer screening guideline such that all adults age...
Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
Pathetic Anesthesiologist Can’t Even Put Own Kids to Sleep
In an embarrassing display of parenting incompetence, 38-year-old anesthesiologist Eric Springer was unable to put his own kids to bed late Thursday night. That's...
Breaking: Surgeon Asks Anesthesia to Lower His Tray Table
DELTA 291 - Citing numerous reasons why he couldn't perform the maneuver by himself, passenger and general surgeon Richard Patton has asked Anesthesia to lower his tray table...
Curare Darts Phased Out Despite Drug Shortages
MACON, GA - Like many medical centers, St. Joseph the Protector Hospital is experiencing severe drug shortages, especially in the operating room. The latest unobtainable...
Anesthesiologist General Requests Senate Democrats Continue to Perform all Presidential Blocks
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a move sure to frustrate the President, Anesthesiologist General Dr. Jerome Adams has decided that he will not perform any...
US Men’s Soccer Team Blames Loss to Trinidad On Anesthesia
COUVA, TRINIDAD - The US Men’s National Soccer Team sustained the most disappointing loss in Team history losing to Trinidad and Tobago eliminating them...
Breaking: Ativan is the Best Medicine, Laughter Falls to Sixth
BOSTON, MA - Is laughter the best medicine? Not any more. According to a new poll of physicians and other medical providers published in the New England...
Anesthesiologists Cannot Find Reason to Cancel Case Right Before Shift Change
SPOKANE, WA – In a stunning development, believed to be the first of its kind here at Southern Spokane University Hospital, a patient is...