Nation Washes Hands for the First Time

0
NASHVILLE, TN - The coronavirus from Wuhan, China is a global pandemic. People are terrified. Hoarding toilet paper, cleaning out grocery stores, and now...

Aliens Postpone Earth Invasion Due to Coronavirus Concerns

0
INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION - Due to justified concerns about their own immune systems, an alien race has decided to postpone their plans for a...

BREAKING: Urgent Care Owners Losing Money Lie in Attempt to Regain Income

0
Bakersfield, CA - Two physicians who don't actually work in Emergency Rooms or at real hospitals have recently made waves with a youtube video...

CDC recommends Dr. Oz wear “Duct Tape Mask” to slow down false information

0
Atlanta, GA - CDC released new guidelines Thursday which includes a "Duct Tape Mask" for Dr. Oz to wear. "These new guidlines should...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

COVID-19: CDC Says “We’re Totally Effed” in a Zombie Apocalypse

0
ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) says they're not trying to be curt but if we can't deal with...

Nation to Vote on Which Celebrity to Sacrifice to COVID19 Gods

0
Who will you vote to eliminate; Miley Cyrus, Malone Post, Kanye West, or all of the Kardashians? All we know is that even if it doesn't stop the virus, America still wins!

Scrubs: ‘How Disease Spreads’ (Must Watch!)

0
This clip shows a classic example of hospital infections and how they can spread, from the greatest medical show of all-time. Wash them hands...

In Last-Ditch Effort, Federal Reserve Gives Crashing U.S. Stocks 1 Amp of Bicarb

0
NEW YORK, NY - In a truly last-ditch effort to prevent U.S. stocks from crashing, the Federal Reserve Bank of New York has asked...

A Side-by-Side Look: COVID-19 Vaccines vs. Super Mario Invincibility Star

0
The Food & Drug Administration (FDA) first granted Emergency Use Authorization to the Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 vaccine earlier this month, with Moderna's COVID-19 vaccine shortly...

COVID-19: ACGME Redeploys Interns to Check on Healthcare Workers’ Parents

0
CHICAGO, IL - The Accreditation Council for Graduate Medical Education (ACGME) announced that interns will no longer see patients not only to preserve personal...