CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC: Inhale Lysol Before, After Every COVID-19 Encounter

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ATLANTA, GA - Based on recent review of the available evidence, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) strongly recommends inhaling Lysol before...

COVID-19 Solution: In Event of Vent Shortage, Med Students Will Bag Indefinitely

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CHANTILLY, VA - In the unfortunate but very possible event a surge of COVID-19 hospitalizations leads to a shortage of ventilators, the American Medical...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

Supply of ICD-10 Codes for COVID-19 “Dangerously Low”

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ATLANTA, GA - Just when the situation couldn't get any more dire for health care professionals on the front line, the Centers for Disease...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

COVID-19: Anesthesia Amazed They Haven’t Been Blamed for Any of This

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SCHAUMBURG, IL - Pandemic coronavirus, COVID-19. Hundreds of thousands infected. Sports suspended. Nations on lockdown. Social distancing. Markets crashing....

Diagnostic Win: COVID-19 Test Comes Back Positive, Negative, and Indeterminate

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NEW HAVEN, CT - A patient and her inpatient medicine team at Yale Medical Center are relieved to report that her nasopharyngeal swab for...

Breaking: Man Flu Caused by COVID-19

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BETHESDA, MD - In a major scientific breakthrough, researchers at the National Institute of Health have uncovered that man flu is both real and...

COVID-19 Study: 90% of Americans Said “But I Feel Fine” Before Testing Positive

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BETHESDA, MD - In a new study published in the Diary of the American Medical Association (DAMA), researchers found that 90% of U.S. patients...

Nation Washes Hands for the First Time

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NASHVILLE, TN - The coronavirus from Wuhan, China is a global pandemic. People are terrified. Hoarding toilet paper, cleaning out grocery stores, and now...
pulmonary team

Valiant MD Dies Climbing Up Stairs with Both N95 & Surgical Mask On

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ATLANTA, GA - Beloved father, mother, son, daughter, friend, foe, and hospitalist Dr. Brent Hammersley, 46, died in heroic fashion at work today when...
orthopedic surgeon orthopedics orthopaedics

Thousands of Surgeons Dying Daily of Wearing Masks

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Chicago, IL- The American Association of Orthopaedic Surgeons announced today that the nation is running out of orthopaedic surgeons.  “We’re losing 1,500-2,000 surgeons everyday. They’re...