Orthopaedic Surgeons Directed to Shelter in Hospital Gym Until COVID-19 Clears

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Somewhere, AL – Brock Hammersley has been very concerned as he has watched the Coronavirus spread across the globe. “To be honest, my biggest fear...

Orthopaedic Surgeons Attempting to “Re-learn” ICU Things 🤦‍♂️

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San Diego, CA - In light of the ongoing COVID19 Pandemic, physicians of all walks of life are preparing to be called upon to...

COVID-19: Lady Liberty Shelters in Place on Liberty Island

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NEW YORK, NY - Heeding the warnings of local public health officials regarding pandemic COVID-19, the Statue of Liberty will shelter in place on...

COVID-19: U.S. Surgeon General Caught Hoarding All of Nation’s Masks

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Just two weeks after he wisely tweeted "Serious people- STOP BUYING MASKS!" in an effort to prevent a shortage of masks...
orthopedic surgeon orthopedics orthopaedics

Thousands of Surgeons Dying Daily of Wearing Masks

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Chicago, IL- The American Association of Orthopaedic Surgeons announced today that the nation is running out of orthopaedic surgeons.  “We’re losing 1,500-2,000 surgeons everyday. They’re...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC: Inhale Lysol Before, After Every COVID-19 Encounter

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ATLANTA, GA - Based on recent review of the available evidence, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) strongly recommends inhaling Lysol before...
vaccines

Breaking: Healthcare Workers Experiencing Hope as Side Effect of COVID-19 Vaccine

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ATLANTA, GA - The most common side effect or adverse reaction healthcare workers are experiencing after the first dose of the Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 vaccine...

COVID-19: New 10-Foot Stethoscope Allows Exam from Safe Distance

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MAPLEWOOD, MN - 3M has announced plans to ramp up production of a new Littmann COVID-19 stethoscope specially designed with 10 feet of tubing...

Nation Gives Fauci Permission to Take 15-Minute Power Nap

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UNITED STATES - American citizens have given Dr. Anthony Fauci, the Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, permission to sneak...
davinci robot

COVID-19 Breakthrough: Redeployed Da Vinci Can Swab One Patient Per Day

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BOSTON, MA - In what is already considered the biggest breakthrough against COVID-19 in the United States, surgeons report that Da Vinci robots have...