toilet paper

Preserve Toilet Paper: CDC Strongly Recommends Against Defecation

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has updated its COVID-19 guidelines, stating it recommends strongly against defecation, this in...
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FDA Studying Bicarb in Treatment of Coronavirus

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Desperate times call for desperate measures. Numerous drugs are being studied in the treatment of novel coronavirus, but the Food...

An Orthopaedic Surgeon Explains Coronavirus

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Globogym Headquarters, CA – All rights dudes and dudettes, this Coronavirus is treating the world the way Busch Light treats gas station toilets. So...
santa claus stuck

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas: ‘Rona Version

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'Twas the night before Christmas, a week after my first dose of vaccine, The in-laws came to visit, when they should be quarantined! I ducked...
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Brave MD Sorts Through Inbox of 100,000 COVID-19 Emails

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PORTLAND, OR - It goes without saying that every act of bravery in a time of crisis should be recognized. Today Gomerblog wants...

Med Students to Get Vaccine After General Population, Cacti, Humpback Whales

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ATLANTA, GA - Commenting their status as backline healthcare workers, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has recommended medical students get vaccinated...
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Thousands of Surgeons Dying Daily of Wearing Masks

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Chicago, IL- The American Association of Orthopaedic Surgeons announced today that the nation is running out of orthopaedic surgeons.  “We’re losing 1,500-2,000 surgeons everyday. They’re...

CDC recommends Dr. Oz wear “Duct Tape Mask” to slow down false information

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Atlanta, GA - CDC released new guidelines Thursday which includes a "Duct Tape Mask" for Dr. Oz to wear. "These new guidlines should...

Nation Gives Fauci Permission to Take 15-Minute Power Nap

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UNITED STATES - American citizens have given Dr. Anthony Fauci, the Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, permission to sneak...

Orthopaedic Surgeon Spends Hours Wandering ICU Bathroom Looking for Pulmonary Toilet

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NEW YORK, NY - When COVID-19 cases in Manhattan started ramping up, local orthopaedic surgeon Brock Hammersley knew he wanted to help however he...