Internal Medicine

Black & Blue Friday

ACEP Renames Black Friday ‘Black & Blue Friday’

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IRVING, TX - Recognizing Black Friday not as the first day of the holiday shopping season but as a day to "kill each other...
honest patient

Doctor Confused by Record Number of Honest Patients

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SACRAMENTO, CA - In a truly unusual streak of luck, Dr. Joy Arbor of Sacramento Family Health had all honest patients on her panel...
P90X Kegel

Product Review: P90X Kegel Edition for Urinary Incontinence

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Pros / Tony Horton's new P90X Kegel program can transform your pelvic floor muscles from flab to fab in just 90 days, curing incontinence...

EMR Developers Shocked to Learn How Their Software is Actually Used

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Several developers of widely-used electronic medical record (EMR) software were invited out of their cubicles last week for a much-hyped tour of the real-world...
colonoscopy

Nitwit GI Doc Leaves Scope in Patient’s Colon Again

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - "Gosh darn it!" exasperated nitwit gastroenterologist Steven Moravsky uttered in a state of shock earlier today when endoscopy suite staff...
ICD

Covid-19 Prevention: New AICD Delivers Shock Whenever You Touch Your Face

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VOLTAGE, OR—In what can only be described as “shocking” news, the FDA recently approved a novel implantable cardioverter-defibrillator that not only senses dangerous arrhythmias...

With No Mega Millions Winner, Millions of Healthcare Professionals Begrudgingly Show Up to Work

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CHICAGO, IL - Many, if not every single health care professional, woke up this morning before heading to work and checked to see if...
joint commssion tips

Petition to Rip Down All Joint Commission Tips and Pearls Sheets from Bathroom Stalls...

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How sick are you of seeing Joint Commission tips and acronyms printed out and taped to bathroom stalls?  If you are like most health...
traffic jam Flonase

Doctor Tries to Clear Up Traffic Congestion with Flonase

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ATLANTA, GA - Sincerely hoping that the rush-hour traffic this afternoon is just a manifestation of seasonal allergies, internist Roger Willoughby has just given...

It Took Over 3 Years, But ICU Team Finally Finishes Untangling All Those Lines

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SAN JOSE, CA - It took over 3 years and 7 months to do, but the intensive care unit (ICU) team at Holy Cross...