Internal Medicine

medical SOAP note

Internist Creates Last Written SOAP Note: A Masterpiece for the Ages

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STONY BROOK, NY - On the eve of the Good Samaritan Hospital's final conversion to an all electronic medical record, local internal medicine legend,...

DIY Furniture Assembly Stress Test Validated in Landmark Trial

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PERTH, WESTERN AUSTRALIA - Researchers at the Outback University Hospital have presented data from their landmark DIY-IKEA trial this week, illustrating the benefit of...
food service

Hospital Stops Serving Food

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MORGANTOWN, NC - North Carolina Christian Medical Center (NCCMC) in northwestern NC proudly announces landmark cost-cutting steps projected to save millions of dollars and generate...

New Brutally-Honest Bowel Prep ‘GoVyolently’ To Replace GoLytely

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DENVER, CO - Dr. Krista Gustadson has had to explain the actual effects of GoLytely the patients undergoing bowel prep before a colonoscopy ever...

PyeongChang Update: Shirtless Tongan Hospitalized with Hypothermia

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PYEONGCHANG, SOUTH KOREA - Sadly, we knew it was bound to happen: Tongan athlete Pita Taufatofua, also known as the Shirtless Tongan, has just...
wishbone

Ortho Consulted to Repair Broken Wishbone

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NASHVILLE, TN - Orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley was consulted last night after the wishbone of an 18-lb. turkey was shattered by two members of the...
gi scope

Dr. Oz’s Colonoscopy Reveals That He’s FOS

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CLEVELAND, OH - After years of nauseating lies and verbal diarrhea, America’s leading medical quack Dr. Oz finally underwent a much needed colonoscopy today...
white coats White Coat Investor

Respiratory Techs, Dietitians Enraged Over New Policy Allowing Janitors to Wear White Coats

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PORTLAND, OR - A new policy has caused a controversy at a local hospital, with multiple departments banding together against the measure which now allows...
elderly patient

What Kind of Older Hospitalized Patient Do You Want to Be?

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Fellow health care professionals, let’s face it: We’re all going to grow old and die.  We’re all going to be hospitalized at some point,...

Friends and Enemas

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Healthcare patients and staff alike, know and enjoy the thrill of a good enema. The art and science of colon cleansing (colonics) has taken...