Goat Sacrifice to Ba’al Replaces Medicine Rounds, No Change in Patient Outcomes
During the seventh hour of internal medicine rounds one day, Dr. Frownalot had an intriguing idea. After hearing the resident present a patient with...
Attending Answers Telephone at Nurse’s Station, Immediately Regrets Decision
IOWA CITY, IA - Havoc struck the medical ICU this morning when 49 year old intensivist Oliver Reynolds inexplicably decided to answer a telephone...
Hospital Opens Smoker’s Lounge for Patients
CHICAGO, IL - Lord Have Mercy Hospital has taken patient satisfaction to a whole new level by recently opening a “Smoker’s Lounge” for its...
Doctor Horrified to Learn That Today’s Actually Thursday, Not Friday
NEW YORK, NY - Colleagues are watching in stunned silence as Mount Sinai Hospital hospitalist Valerie Owens holds back the tears as it hits her...
It’s Time for a Change: Pharmacists Tired of Being the Last Stop in a...
CHARLESTON, SC - Pharmacists across the country are angry in regards to the pharmacy being the last stop in a patient’s day. Typically, patients are exhausted when...
Residency Program Biopsied, Found to Be Malignant
BOSTON, MA - After undergoing biopsy last week at the insistence of several concerned fourth-year medical students who matched at its program, Pathology has...
Placement: A Hospitalist’s Perspective
By Hospitalist Dr. Eric O'Malley
Placement. I like placement. I like nursing home placement. I like rehab placement. I like acute rehab placement. I like...
Nurses, Doctors on Pace to Lose Over 1 Trillion Pens in 2015
CHICAGO, IL - In a study published in the latest issue of the New England Journal of Penmanship (NEJP), researchers have found that healthcare...
Patient Honest About How Much He Drinks
24-year-old Jimmy Cliff came to University Hospital today for his elective hernia repair, and during the pre-operative interview with the anesthesiologist, he did something...