Internal Medicine

mucous plugs

Dr. Seuss Wrote a Progress Note: The Dung in the Lung

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LA JOLLA, CA—After rounding on his patient, the incomparable Dr. Seuss entered the following progress note into Mr. Scott Hess’s chart: I confess I just...
pregnancy

Vaccinations Now Definitively Linked to Pregnancy

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BOSTON, MA - A new study just published in the Old England Journal of Medicine now definitively links childhood vaccinations to pregnancy. Jenny McCarthy,...
cocktails

GI Cocktail Wasn’t the Cocktail Alcoholic Patient Had in Mind

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LOUISVILLE, KY - Proud alcoholic Steven D'Amato presented to the Emergency Department (ED) of Louisville Medical Center (LMC) with minor withdrawal symptoms and mild...

Hurricane Force Winds Coming From Colonoscopy Suite

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BOSTON, MA - In the wake of Hurricane Harvey, a new threat is developing in nearby Mercy Hospital. Witnesses report hurricane force winds billowing...

Patient Suffers “Partial” Cardiac Arrest

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BOSTON, MA—After years of seeing patients who were reported in the news media to have been found in “full cardiac arrest,” emergency physicians at...

Burned Out Primary Care Doctor’s Job Satisfaction Soars through the Roof Through “Mindfulness”

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In her 11th year working in primary care, Dr. Stacey Canootskin started to notice feelings of irritability, depersonalization, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, and cynicism. Clicking...
nursing home accident

Octogenarian Ejected in Grisly Power-Chair Accident

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BRADENTON, FL - The dining room at Shady Village Retirement Center was a hellish scene of twisted metal, blood, sinew, and mashed potatoes last week, as...
brain stem biopsy

Physical Exam Tips: The Nervous System

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The physical exam of the brain and nervous system can be broken down into two parts: the lumbar puncture and everything else. Lumbar Puncture The lumbar...

Medical Knowledge Expanding So Fast That Everything You Knew When You Started Reading This...

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RAPID CITY, SD - On my first day of medical school, the dean proclaimed that “everything we teach you over the next 4 years...