Disgusting! This Patient’s Cranial Nerves Were Grossly Intact
When you didn't think medicine could deliver any more heebie-jeebies, this clinic just received a large, overnight shipment of them. Last week, per the...
North Korea Hacks ER Pyxis Machines Nationwide, Renders Them Unable to Dispense Dilaudid
WASHINGTON, DC - The White House has announced that North Korea has successfully hacked yet another electronic staple of American life – the drug-dispensing Pyxis...
Study: Dilaudid Administration Directly Correlates with High Patient Satisfaction; Narcan Not So Much
BOSTON, MA - As many doctors and nurses have discovered the hard way, a recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine...
Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes
EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
A COVID-19 Miracle: Jesus Turns Water into Hand Sanitizer
BETHLEHEM - Add another miracle to His already impressive resume: Jesus has offered humanity hope in its fight against COVID-19 by turning water into...
Hospital Employees Organize Christmas Strike After Festivus Snub
NEW YORK, NY - Workers at the Newman Medical Center in Queens, NY have organized a Christmas Day strike after hospital administration failed to...
Area Hospital to Implement New Health Record Using Post-it Notes
AREA, GA - Despite a flurry of activity in healthcare systems across America to implement efficient electronic health records (EHRs) or even more efficient...
ER’s New Dilaudid Salt Lick, Admissions Down 90%
SACRAMENTO, CA - Sutter Health System is changing the game. In a world of overcrowded ERs and the inability to triage efficiently, new innovations...
Brilliant Chemist Gives up Dream of Curing Cancer, Focuses Efforts on Inducing 3 ½...
CAMBRIDGE, MA - Citing practical reasons, 41-year-old renowned chemist and laboratory researcher Charles Kenzington, Ph.D. has formally ended his three-decade quest to discover a...