Medical Knowledge Expanding So Fast That Everything You Knew When You Started Reading This...
RAPID CITY, SD - On my first day of medical school, the dean proclaimed that “everything we teach you over the next 4 years...
In Move To Further Gender Equality, HERpes To Be Renamed HIMpes
With the gender specific city code revolution ongoing in Berkeley, California, the landscape of our language is drastically changing. Physicians throughout the country are...
PGY-1 Writes Admission Note That Does Not Contain a Single English Word
PGY1 IM H&P
HPI:
54M w/ MMP incl. COPD, HFrEF, stg. IV SSC (?1°, w/ mets to LLL c/b CAP x 3, mets to L-S c/b...
God Postpones Miracle Due to Slightly High INR of 1.6
HEAVEN ABOVE - God, Creator of the Universe, has decided to postpone His plans for a miracle today after morning labs revealed an elevated...
Archeologists Discover Ancient Disability Papyrus
GREECE - Last week on the Greek island of Lesbos, a team of archaeologists unearthed a primitive disability papyrus signed by Hippocrates himself in 405...
Narc Madness
It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4! This year...
Hospital Picks Up The Coumadin Channel, Will Bring Back for One More Riveting Season
NASHVILLE, TN - Tennessee Health Sciences (THS) has decided to pick up the critically-acclaimed inpatient TV program known as The Coumadin Channel, which means...
Medical Student Almost Makes Rare Diagnosis
ST. LOUIS, MO - National media outlets are abuzz today with the news that Nishant Kumar, a third-year medical student at St. Louis University’s...
Comey Urologist Confirms: He is a Leaker
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Last week former FBI director James Comey made a startling disclosure: he had given parts of his opening statement before the...
New Product Release: Pediatric Power Chair for Morbidly Obese Children
WHITE PLAINS, NY - In a shrewd but brilliant marketing move last week, Hoveranywhere announced plans to sell thousands of "smaller-sized" pediatric power chairs.
The chairs are...