Internal Medicine

annoyed doctor stage 4 decubitus ulcer

Brave MD Sorts Through Inbox of 100,000 COVID-19 Emails

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PORTLAND, OR - It goes without saying that every act of bravery in a time of crisis should be recognized. Today Gomerblog wants...
Tres Leches

Tres Leches Cake Gives Lactose-Intolerant Patient Tres Diarreas

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NEW YORK, NY - Telling Gomerblog that she can never ever deny her sweet tooth the chance at dessert no matter what the consequences,...
gout

Man Hospitalized for Gout Flare After Just Thinking About Steak

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ATLANTA, GA - A massive sign that his gout is poorly controlled, area 56-year-old Jefferson Mason was hospitalized late last night after just thinking...
Bell Biv Devoe

Toxicologist Bell Biv DeVoe Confirms: ‘That Girl is Poison’

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BOSTON, MA - After "sensing something strange in my mind" for a few days now, Boston emergency physician and toxiciologist Dr. Bell Biv DeVoe has...
transporting patient

Gomer To Be Discharged From Medical Floor Soon As ER Bed Opens Up

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PHILADELPHIA, PA—Ms. Roberta Flowers, well-known to Philadelphia General Hospital staff as a gomer, has successfully been treated for “pneumonia” and is ready to be...
physician on toilet paper coffee sit-to-sh*t 29 seconds

Bravo! Patient’s Continuous Log of Stool Measures 5-Feet Long!

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GREENVILLE, SC - With a swirl of stool in the toilet bowl resembling a generous piece of churro, patient Davis Adderley has just had...
applauding doctors

Ortho Writes Perfect SOAP Note, First No-Worder This Year

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Cliff Kershaw of UCLA Medical Center etched his way into the record books early this morning as he wrote the...

Game of Thrones Pain Scale

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Are you like me and tired of giving the same old boring explanation of the 0-10 pain scale?  Spice it up by using the...
couple kissing

Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor

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Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom. Emergency Medicine Go skydiving to get the...

Nation’s Arteries Brace for Impact of Chipotle’s New Queso

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SACRAMENTO, CA – Speaking at a press conference last Saturday, a local left renal artery expressed “grave concern” amongst itself and the billions of...