Joint Commission is Coming: Hospital to Change Everything for Three Days Then Revert to...
EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital administrators have finally cracked the secret to passing the highly-dreaded Joint Commission inspections. For decades, the Joint Commission (JC) or...
Profits Soar After Area Hospital Opens ‘All You Can Eat/Shoot Narcotics Buffet’
In response to poor HCHAPS scores and declining revenue, St John’s in the Valley has become the first hospital in the nation to trial...
Ashley Madison Data Leak Possibly Linked to Spike in Hospital Admissions
LOS ANGELES, CA - News of the Ashley Madison adultery website data leak is possibly leading to an unexpected surge in hospital resource utilization today,...
Ketchup Packet in Random Clinic Drawer Turns 5 Years Old Today
NEW YORK, NY - And a Happy Fifth Birthday today to the 9-gram Heinz Ketchup packet located in a random desk drawer in some...
New Seizure Dogs Give Rectal Peanut Butter Diastat
Amidst the recent overhaul of policies regarding service animals, the National Service Animal Society (NSAS) has announced a new type of service animal who...
Two Examples of Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Notes
Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Note #1
Procedure:
This is Spinal Tap.
Date/Time:
Optional.
Indication:
Infectious Diseases said it was a good idea.
Resident:
Dr. Kyle Richter, PGY-1.
Attending:
Yes.
A time-out was completed to...
COVID Beauty Tips & Tricks
COVID-19 has meant we’re all working long hours in the hospital, sometimes even with personal protective equipment (PPE). Here are some tips to help...
ACP Guidelines for Low Back Pain: ‘Anything, ANYTHING But Opioids’
PHILADELPHIA, PA - Last week, the American College of Physicians (ACP) published new recommendations for the management of nonradicular low back pain in the...
Cancer Drug Delayed 2 Years Due to Licensing Deal
Boston, MA – Astra-Nomical has delayed their wonder cancer drug, Fizamax (ferazepatab), again. This time up to 2 years because of promotional disputes.
“We were...
Poor Colonoscopy Bowel Prep Blamed on Doctor
BOUTTE, LA - Bobby Boudreaux's colonoscopy had to be aborted this morning due to a poor bowel prep, making it impossible to safely perform...