screening for cancer

TSA to Start Screening for Colorectal Cancer at Airports

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ATLANTA, GA – U.S. government officials said on Thursday that they would start screening patients for unintentional weight loss and bloody stools, starting with...
physician on toilet paper coffee sit-to-sh*t 29 seconds

Review: Lesser-Known Types of Enemas

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Constipation is prevalent in hospitalized patients. Systematic reviews have shown that 99.7% of patients are constipated from prolonged bedrest or medication side effects,...
female doctor

After 14 Years of Medical Training, MD/PhD Still Unsure of Career Path

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HOUSTON, TX - Despite 4 years of medical school, 3 years of PhD training, 5 years of child neurology residency, 1 year of clinical...
African child

African Child Tragically Unaware He Has ‘Marker Negative Mixed Connective Tissue Disorder’‏

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MAUN, BOTSWANA - A desperately impoverished 6-year-old boy in Sub-Saharan Africa lacks the access to medical care which could properly diagnose his "Marker Negative...
bouncy house

So You’re Paged While in a Bouncy House, What to Do Next

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There you are, jumping around happily in a bouncy house when the unthinkable happens: you get paged.  Well, maybe not unthinkable since you are...
drinking alcohol

After Counseling Patient on Evils of Alcohol Abuse, Medical Team Leaves Work & Gets...

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ATLANTA, GA - A multidisciplinary inpatient team at Georgia Medical Center (GMC) spent thirty minutes at bedside warning their patient Doug Johansen of the...
mucous plugs

Pulmonologist Says Sucking Out Mucous Plugs is What He Lives For

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BOSTON, MA - It's a rainy day. It's cold out. Dr. Bailey Corgan, a pulmonologist at Massachusetts Specific Hospital (MSH), is drenched...

The Similarities & Differences Between ED and ED

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Now that you can't say "ER" anymore when referring to the place where drug-seekers go to get Dilaudid, it can be a bit confusing...

Aliens Postpone Earth Invasion Due to Coronavirus Concerns

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INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION - Due to justified concerns about their own immune systems, an alien race has decided to postpone their plans for a...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC: Talking About Scabies Can Give You Scabies

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has some unfortunate news for everyone: Talking about scabies can actually give you...