Internal Medicine

Crayola, codes

Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes

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EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
elderly lady

Sweet Little Old Lady Has Impressive Vocabulary of Profanity

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ATLANTA, GA - 94-year-old and 96-lb. Annabelle Rivers is as sweet and tiny as they come.  She always has her makeup done right first...

Hospitals Now Offering Official Sponsorship

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DENVER, CO - Historically hospitals have struggled to stay afloat, and have strived to maintain adequate staffing.  Looking for answers, hospital administrators of St. Mary’s Hospital...
angry surgeon

New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings

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ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings.  “We’ve known...
quitting medicine

Doctor Achieves Lifelong Dream of Quitting Medicine Forever

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“Finally!” he exclaimed, throwing his white coat, scrubs, and stethoscope onto a pile of logs. “I can’t believe I made it!” Meet Hunter McCutchen.  He...
patient cocoon

Medical Team Unable to Penetrate Patient’s Protective Blanket Cocoon

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - “I think it’s alive,” whispered intern Jason McCarren to nurse Mya Roberts, both at the patient’s bedside puzzled. “Are you sure?”...

Traffic Not Only Causes Stress, It Causes Syphilis Too

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STUCK IN THE MIDDLE LANE (STILL), INTERSTATE 85 SOUTH, ATLANTA, GA - Traffic jams are modern transit’s strokes.  At rush hour or any hour in...

Trump Unites Us All with Plan to Build Wall Around Hospitals, Prevent Admissions

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CLEVELAND, OH - In front of supporters at the Republican National Convention, Donald Trump has unified not only the Republican Party but also Americans,...
vaccine theory

ZDoggMD: I Was Wrong About Vaccines

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Finally, ZDoggMD has taken the lead and has come to admit that he has been wrong on vaccines for decades.  It took courage and...
crying hospital

Breaking: First Batch of Crying July 1st Interns Spotted

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ATHENS, GA - In breaking news to GomerBlog, the first batch of crying July 1st interns were spotted in a rarely used stairwell at...