Internal Medicine

npo guidelines acute pulmonary embolism

100,000,000 Miles Later: Santa Diagnosed with Acute Pulmonary Embolism

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NORTH POLE - Santa pulled off another successful Christmas for children around the world but it has come with a cost: Earlier this morning,...
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Mother Who Pushed Child into Medicine Charged with Parental Malpractice

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BOCA RATON, FL - An area mother who recklessly pushed her son into the field of medicine has been charged with 6 counts of...

What Your Hospital Coffee Selection Says About You

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1) The “For Patient’s Only” Coffee Machine The feigned ‘exclusiveness’ of this particular brew forces a smug smile on the face of any resident or...
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North Korea Hacks ER Pyxis Machines Nationwide, Renders Them Unable to Dispense Dilaudid

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WASHINGTON, DC - The White House has announced that North Korea has successfully hacked yet another electronic staple of American life – the drug-dispensing Pyxis...
New England Journal of Medicine New England Journals

Doctor Summons Courage to Toss Unread New England Journals

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PITTSBURGH, PA - Sometimes it's better to acknowledge one's own shortcomings and move on.  That is why we're saluting a hero, internist Dr. Keisha...

Thawed Medieval Surgeon Still Prescribing Too Much Bloodletting Despite All the Evidence

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MUNICH, GERMANY - Lord Lockwell was recently discovered in the Bavarian Alps near the German-Switzerland border in a small town called Konstanz.  Due to...

Children’s Book Review: Grace & Chase Tackle Acid-Base

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Pros / This book is a colorful, lyrical, and fun read for precocious infants, toddlers, and children with an interest in acid-base disorders. Cons /...
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Ortho Writes Perfect SOAP Note, First No-Worder This Year

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Cliff Kershaw of UCLA Medical Center etched his way into the record books early this morning as he wrote the...

With No Mega Millions Winner, Millions of Healthcare Professionals Begrudgingly Show Up to Work

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CHICAGO, IL - Many, if not every single health care professional, woke up this morning before heading to work and checked to see if...

Ask a Drug Seeker

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Dear Drug Seeker, I’m really concerned about the Zika virus and the Summer Olympics going on as scheduled. Do you think this is a good...