Medical Students Excited to Volunteer for Studies of Ebola Transmission
SACRAMENTO, CA - In the wake of the CDC’s announcement that we still do not fully understand exactly how the Ebola virus is transmitted, several...
Patient in Room 3 Worried After Code Blues in 1, 2, 4 & 5
ATLANTA, GA - “Oh God oh God oh God!” is what Tim McConnell said to himself in a fit of paranoia after a fourth...
Floyd Mayweather Intubated After Aspirating $300 Million in Revenue
LAS VEGAS, NV - Less than 24 hours after extending his record to an incredible 50-0 after defeating MMA fighter Conor McGregor, Floyd "Money"...
Breaking News: Scientists Almost Know What the ‘V’ in COVID Stands For
TULSA, OK- In a major update in the race for a vaccine for COVID-19, we have learned of a promising development from the scientific...
Sticks & Stones Didn’t Break Area Man’s Bones, Words Did
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Local Ralph Merriam is one lucky man. Thanks to his medical team and over six hours of emergent surgery, Merriam is...
Medical Science Catching Up to Fad Diets in New Exciting Breakthrough
PORTLAND, OR - In what is being called one of the greatest breakthroughs in modern medicine, scientists at Hood River University have discovered a...
NIH Plans to Study Why Narcotics, Benzos Fall Into Sinks, Toilets Excessively
BETHESDA, MD - Last week, the National Institutes of Health (NIH) stated that it has $2 million in grant money set aside for a study...
Master Radiologist Able to Hedge on Every Possible Medical Condition
BOSTON, MA – According to the abdominal CT scan report internist Dr. Sam Erikson just pulled up, master radiologist Dr. Bart Waddell has once again...
Dammit, It’s a Ruse! Nystatin Isn’t a Statin After All
BETHESDA, MD - The medical world is at a loss for words after scientists at the National Institute of Health (NIH) dropped the megaton...