Ancient Aliens Take Over Electronic Medical Records
GROOM LAKE, NV - Why does your electronic medical record (EMR) function sooooo poorly? Are ignorance, negligence, and terrible design the answer? Can intrusive government...
Breaking News: Kevin Bacon Diagnosed with Sixth-Degree Heart Block
LOS ANGELES, CA - After developing the sudden onset of shortness of breath, self-proclaimed Center of the Universe Kevin Bacon was rushed to UCLA Medical...
Rare Patient Asks Only for Tylenol for Pain, Receives Standing Ovation
ATLANTA, GA - Chelsea Mason is one amazing woman. Only 12 hours removed from a knee replacement surgery for severe osteoarthritis, Mason has left...
Neurology Avoids Disaster Admission, Admits to Medicine
HAMPTON, CA - Kaiser Health Hospital had a close call this Wednesday. Thanks to the diligent efforts of Dr. Trevenstein, a neurology attending at Mercy...
Tattoo-to-Tooth Ratio a Strong Intelligence Predictor
BIRMINGHAM, AL – Hospital administrators have been searching for better ways to educate patients prior to being discharged. Administrators may have found their answer...
Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...
WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...
Patient Still 10/10 Pain Even After a ‘Being-Set-On-Fire’ Analogy
NEWARK, NJ - Patient Deborah Skemp woke up today at 6:30 a.m. during rounds by her physician Dr. Waters. He asked her the usual morning...
Goop from ER Break Room Becomes Sentient, Asks for Dilaudid
DALLAS, TX - In an amazing breakthrough for science, a new life form has spontaneously willed itself into existence in the break room of a...
Unattended Orthopedic Surgeon Left in Hot Van
PHOENIX, AZ - A tragedy occurred at Sacred Heart Hospital on Tuesday. A couple of patients discovered an unattended orthopedic surgeon in a scorching hot van...
The Difference Between Staff & Staph
Over the past several weeks, Gomerblog has observed an uptick in medical documentation mishaps in which the words “staff” and “Staph” are used incorrectly. ...