Internal Medicine

hand washing

IDSA Releases New Recommendations: Handwashing is Bullsh*t

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ARLINGTON, VA - The world of medicine has been rocked early this morning with the release of new recommendations by the Infectious Diseases Society...
Iron Man hemochromatosis

Breaking: Iron Man Diagnosed with Hemochromatosis

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NEW YORK, NY - After his primary care physician insist he undergo several tests over the past month to uncover the cause of his...
health care

Hospitalist Breaks His Own Record by Seeing 100 Patients in a Day

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Dr. Speedy Gonzalez didn’t realize untill he counted the number of patients at the end of a busy Saturday evening that he had broken...
dilaudid graph

Study: Dilaudid Administration Directly Correlates with High Patient Satisfaction; Narcan Not So Much

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BOSTON, MA - As many doctors and nurses have discovered the hard way, a recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine...
prescription

Study: Narcotic Script Has a 95% Chance of Running Out on a Weekend

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DURHAM, NC – Researchers at Duke University have discovered that a typical 30-day supply of Vicodin or Percocet has a 95.3% chance of running...
mucous plugs

Pulmonologist Says Sucking Out Mucous Plugs is What He Lives For

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BOSTON, MA - It's a rainy day. It's cold out. Dr. Bailey Corgan, a pulmonologist at Massachusetts Specific Hospital (MSH), is drenched...
feeding tube

Resident Tries G-Tube Feeds: ‘Really Not That Bad’

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NEW YORK, NY – In a move sure to garner mixed reactions from colleagues and staff, second-year internal medicine resident Jon Paniagua opened a...
laughter is the best medicine

Study: Laughter Truly is the Best Medicine, Except for Cases of Severe Diarrhea

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SAN ANTONIO, TX – A new study published in The Medicine Journal demonstrated that laughter truly is the best medicine for medical aliments.  The study...

Old School vs. New School Physical Exam

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The physical exam has changed, let's admit it.  In what ways?  Let's compare the old school and new school physical exams and see how...

German Scientists develops safe, effective tool to remove gerbils from rectums

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Oslo, Norway - An advancement that has been heralded as a boon for animal rights and paraphilia aficionados everywhere was recently unveiled at the...