Internal Medicine

CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

Why Not: CDC Recommends Adding Vanco & Zosyn to the Water

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ATLANTA, GA - Finally accepting the reality that antibiotic stewardship among health care professionals is just a pipe dream, Acting Director of the Centers...
intern physician worth it

EM Intern Kicked Out Of Residency For Completing Full Work-Up Of Patient Before Consulting...

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“We absolutely will not tolerate this kind of behavior,” the irate Department of Emergency Medicine chairman began. “This isn’t like the old days when...
angry patient

Tips: How to Defuse the Angry Patient (or at the Very Least, Make Things...

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Handling the angry patient (or family member) is a very delicate situation, so we should all be grateful that we were never educated on...
elderly patient

Elderly Man Admitted with MI Requests Pediatrics Consult

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ORLANDO, FL—Bobby Kidman, an elderly man admitted to the hospital today with a suspected myocardial infarction bizarrely rejected a cardiology consultation and instead requested...

Breaking News: Doctor Cycles Blood Pressure Cuff By Himself

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JANESVILLE, MI - In an unprecedented occurrence Dr. Fern noticed the absence of a morning blood pressure.  Starting to walk out of the room...
tuck patient

Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home

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PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...

Intern Immediately Regrets Asking Open-Ended Question

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SAN JOSE, CA - “Hi, Mr. Jones.  Tell me about your night,” said by the stupidest, know-nothingest, why-did-I-just-do-that intern, Dr. Austin.  Austin, a new...

The Latest Fashion Trend for the Fall: Chin Hammocks

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The fall is here and with it, comes the latest fashion trends for the coolest and hippest of people of the world: those who...
chest pain

No Matter the Symptom, Local Cardiologist Pretty Convinced It’s an Anginal Equivalent

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ATLANTA, GA - No matter the symptom, no matter the severity, and no matter the location, onset, or duration, local cardiologist Willie McCray is...
mouse clicks

Healthcare Professionals Sweep Medals In All Olympic Mouse-Clicking Events

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RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - Healthcare professionals' historic dominance of Olympic mouse-clicking events has continued as competition nears completion. Doctors, nurses, physician's assistants, respiratory...