Spock: “Patient’s Demands for Dilaudid Highly Illogical”
STARFLEET - Mr. Spock of the USS Enterprise has informed Gomerblog that he finds his patient's demands for Dilaudid and other narcotics "highly illogical."
He confided...
Devious MRSA Spider Bites Yet Another Antecubital Fossa, Remains at Large
GASTONIA, NC - Following an all-too-familiar recent theme, a new patient was assaulted last week by a psychotic spider rampaging through the South.
Earl Wayne...
Latest Research Suggests That a Nice Family Prognosticates Mortality in the Intensive Care Unit
ABSTRACT
Background
A group of 1594 (667 were excluded for lack of relative personality traits) patients in a large metropolitan hospital were enrolled in a research...
Doctors shocked to discover patient with low pain tolerance
PHILADELPHIA, PA - Dr. John Payne, an orthopaedist at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia just announced a shocking discovery he made yesterday, while in...
Unchartered Territory: Doctor Makes Patient NPO After Discharge
DURHAM, NC - Stating that the outside world contains enough variables to make pulmonary aspiration a true and serious risk, hospitalist Mack Reynolds has...
Brand New Vital Sign Added to Monitors and Electronic Medical Records
SAN DIEGO, CA – New governmental regulations passed last week by Congress have created another vital sign, making this the 6th core vital sign,...
After Successful Renovation, New Call Room is Now Optimized to Cause Full-On Depression
JACKSONVILLE, FL - Convinced that being on-call isn't difficult enough in its own right, hospital administrators at Jacksonville Medical Center have successfully completed renovation of its...
Citing Principle of Autonomy, AHA Recommends Patients Run Own Codes
ALLAS, TX—A major principle of medical ethics is that of autonomy, which states that patients should be highly involved in decisions regarding their health...
Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home
PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...