A Primer to How We All Consult One Another
Does your patient need help but you're just not sure who to consult for help? This GomerBlog primer is here to break things down...
Patients Cancel Colonoscopy Due to Diarrhea
BOSTON, MA - Due to a local outbreak of a diarrheal illness that has been short lived, several of our planned colonoscopies have been...
New Study Shows Tammyflu Pills Provide Eternal Life
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Yesterday, Roach Pharmaceuticals announced the results of a new flu treatment study which is sure to change the course of...
Breaking: Martin Shkreli & Heather Bresch Are A**holes
NEW YORK, NY - In a candid interview on CBS News yesterday, Martin Shkreli admitted that "Yes, Heather Bresch and I are a**holes." Mylan...
Startling Report: CDC Recommends Against Vaccinations, Anti-Vaxxers Now Demanding Their Right to Vaccinate
ATLANTA, GA - After a funding change, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) completed a meta-analysis using super statistical procedures and skewed...
CDC Warning: Dangerous “Dry Humping” Bug Found in Lower U.S.
ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) has identified a new insect vector that is rampantly spreading disease in the southern portions...
Hospital Issues Memorandum Regarding the Revised Policy for Procedure Revisions
To All Hospital Employees:
This memorandum is being issued as notification regarding the revised Policy for Procedure Revisions. The Policy for Procedure Revisions outlines the...
Post-Cardiac Arrest Fonzie Not Eligible for Therapeutic Hypothermia, “He’s Already Too Cool”
MILWAUKEE, WI - The critical care service at Sweet Sweet Mercy Hospital has denied Fonzie a potentially life-saving intervention. He recently suffered an out...
U.S. Hospitals to Close After Patients Test Positive for COVID-19
CHICAGO, IL - The NBA suspended its season when its first player tested positive for COVID. American public schools closed when its first...
I-85 in Atlanta is Finally Therapeutic, Heparin Bridge D/C’d
ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog is excited to report that I-85 in Atlanta, which collapsed 6 weeks ago for reasons that can likely be blamed...