Internal Medicine

doctor patient

Breaking: Patient States His Medical History Should “All be in the Computer”

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CHARLESTON, SC - Breaking News emerged today out of South Carolina’s Emergency Department of Save Us All Memorial Hospital (SUAMH). A 57-year-old patient arrived...

Man ‘Accidentally Falls’ on Gerbil That Ran Through Lube

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MEMPHIS, TN – A local resident presented to the emergency room with an unusual complaint this evening.  Chief complaint: "My bottom really hurts." At first he was...

Residents Dismiss Report They Rarely Wash White Coats: “We Don’t Wash Our Regular Clothes...

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HYGIENE, CO—According to a recent study, doctors rarely, if ever, launder their white lab coats, a nauseating fact given that these coats carry and...

Medcomic: WPW Edition (Whoa, Surf’s Up!)

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Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome (WPW) is a pre-excitation syndrome of intermittent tachycardia that results from an accessory pathway (the bundle of Kent) directly connecting the atria...
plastic grabber

Colonoscopes Replaced by Plastic Reachers from Home Depot

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CHICAGO, IL - Hospital administrators are looking to tighten the pursestrings some more as they look to replace colonoscopes with plastic reachers & grabbers...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Recommends Against HIV, Infections in General

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ATLANTA, GA - In a statement earlier today, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has recommended against the human immunodeficiency virus (or...

Electronic Hell Records Parody Video

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If you love electronic medical records, then you will HATE this video! Please make sure you chart that you watched this video. Healthcare NOT...
used speculum tongue depressor

CDC: Stop Using Purulent Speculums as Tongue Depressors

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ATLANTA, GA - Disturbed by a surge in case reports driven by medical providers who are either short on equipment or just extremely lazy,...

Breaking News: Scientists Almost Know What the ‘V’ in COVID Stands For

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TULSA, OK- In a major update in the race for a vaccine for COVID-19, we have learned of a promising development from the scientific...

Hospital Unveils Pain Scale That Goes to Eleven

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VANCOUVER, BC - In the movie This is Spinal Tap, guitarist Nigel Tufnel proudly shows off an amplifier that turns up to eleven instead...