Internal Medicine

placement medicine

‘Hospital Medicine’ Renamed ‘Placement Medicine’

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Society of Hospital Medicine (SHM) has announced that effective January 1, 2017, the specialty known as Hospital Medicine will be...
donut hole ACA

Affordable Care Act to Close Donut Hole with Delicious Strawberry Filling

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WASHINGTON, DC - For years, the Medicare Part D coverage gap or “donut hole” had always left senior citizens with a less-than-sweet taste in...

United Airlines Asked to Forcibly Remove Patient from Hospital

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CHICAGO, IL - Local patient Sam Johnson, who is being "taken care of" at Mercy Hospital, has not been able to leave for 7 months....

Move Over Pain Score….the Crazy Score is Here!

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Given the overarching success of the Pain Score leading to the opioid crisis, The Joint Commission (for Healthcare Absurdity) has now added the sixth...
placebo pill

Lupus Foundation Places Nation’s Supply of Hydroxychloroquine Under Quarantine

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WASHINGTON, DC—Except for people with lupus, anyone else hoping to score some hydroxychloroquine (HCQ), is unfortunately out of luck. In an effort to keep...

Doctors May Qualify for Law Degree After Completing HIPAA and EMTALA Compliance Training

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A report by the Institute of Legal Education states that doctors are likely eligible for a Juris Doctorate degree after completing mandatory training for...
white doctor

White Doctors Removed From Endangered Species List After Successful Breeding In Captivity

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a landmark move marking the resounding success of the Caucasian Physician Breeding In Captivity Program (CPBCP), the U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service...
crossfit

New Mental Health Hotline Established for CrossFitters and Vegans

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Seattle, WA- North Seattle General Hospital held an emergency press conference today to roll out their mental health hotline for CrossFitters and Vegans that...

Departmental Didactics Migrated to Jerkmate.com

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In light of the ongoing Covid-19 pandemic and the need for social distancing, your department announced today that all future didactics will be conducted...
vaccination

New Vaccination Campaign Seeks to Eradicate Anti-Vax Movement by 2030

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WASHINGTON, DC—Jenny McCarthy, once famous for a spread of nude photos in Playboy and now for causing the spread of measles in the US,...