Internal Medicine

New Medical Unit Quiet Hours Now From 3 PM to 2:59 PM

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NASHVILLE, TN - In an effort to provide much needed peace and quiet for the medical staff, Unit 4G at Nashville Memorial Hospital has...
arterial line circle of willis CPR emergency department butthurt audacity code shift change prior authorization otherwise stable

So Rude: Patient Has the Audacity to Code at Shift Change

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ORLANDO, FL - In one of the most selfish acts of which Gomerblog has heard in recent memory, a 72-year-old male patient admitted last...
sword swallower reflux

Sword Swallower Wondering Why He Has Reflux All of a Sudden

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TAMPA, FL - With a quizzical look on his face and a first held to his epigastrium, circus performer and sword swallower, Matthew the...
physical exam

Ode to the Death of the Physical Exam

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Here ye, here ye On this day we take the time to remember The loss of a fond friend, The physical exam Gone are the days Of the bedside...

AMA: Casino Cruise Business ‘In the Works’

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CHICAGO, IL - The American Medical Association (AMA) was initially formed to represent the interests of physicians and "to promote the art and science of...
medical researcher

Author Concludes “No Further Studies Necessary”

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BOSTON, MA - In a striking bout of confidence, Dr. Jannek Nusenbaum, MD, PhD recently concluded in the New England Journal of Medicine that...

Covid-19: Newly Released “Contagion 2” Gives People Much-Needed Escape from Reality

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HOLLYWOOD, CA—Understanding that Americans desperately need an escape from the non-stop, grim Covid-19 news, Steven Soderbergh, who directed the very popular 2011 original, announced...
colonoscopy

Nitwit GI Doc Leaves Scope in Patient’s Colon Again

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - "Gosh darn it!" exasperated nitwit gastroenterologist Steven Moravsky uttered in a state of shock earlier today when endoscopy suite staff...
hypertension guidelines

Watching Cable News Raises Blood Pressure Better than Levophed, Study Finds

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It is common knowledge that watching your Grandpa getting riled up night after night watching cable news opinion hosts rant and rave about their...
routine blood work urine A-fib B-minus

Routine Blood Work Comes Back Positive for Urine

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LOUISVILLE, KY - Alissa Morgan returned to see her primary care doctor (PCP), Dr. Mel Oberlin, today to go over her routine blood work,...