CDC: Coronavirus Vaccine Will Be Ready for Refusal By Anti-Vaxxers By 2021
ATLANTA, GA - Officials at the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) announced today that they believe the new vaccine currently under development...
Physician Shocked to Learn Banana Bags Not Made with Real Fruit
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Local hospitalist Marcel Beignet was shocked and aghast to learn from colleagues today that banana bags, which are used to...
Houston Trauma Teams Prepare for Deadly Super Bowl Shootout
HOUSTON, TX - Emergency crews and trauma teams in the Houston area are nervous but ready for Sunday night, as experts are expecting a...
Hospital to Replace Clipboard Nurses with iPad Nurses
SEATTLE, WA - Greater Seattle Memorial Hospital announced plans earlier today to replace its clipboard nurses with iPad nurses. Specifically, senior-level nursing personnel who...
New Female Libido Pill to Hit Shelves
ATLANTA, GA - A new female libido pill is expected to hit shelves this week called Pamper. The pill is designed to put that flame...
Doctor to Hand Out Metformin for Halloween
HOUSTON, TX – Local physician Dr. Sharma plans to hand out “Fun-Size” packages of metformin this Halloween.
“Pretty much every child develops diabetes on November...
Intern honored for shortening length of stay by leaving everyone NPO
Intern Connor was given the distinguished length of stay award by prestigious academic hospital. During his acceptance speech he stated he was not surprised...
Discharged Patient on Contact Precautions in Hospital, Spotted at Local Grocery Store
BALTIMORE, MD – 63-year-old Clarence Deeters was recently discharged from Mercy Hospital after being admitted and treated for urosepsis. While in the hospital for over...
CDC Issues Blood Gravy Content Chart for Thanksgiving
ATLANTA, GA - Ahead of Thanksgiving, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has issued a new blood gravy content (BCG) chart, reminding...
China now referring to Type 2 Diabetes as ‘The American Disease”
China has taken the brunt of the blame for the COVID-19 pandemic, both as the source of the virus, and for the scarcity of...