Orthopedic Surgeon Celebrates Transfusing Patient to 100% Hematocrit
DENVER, CO - Ortho spine surgeon Brik Bowers recently set the all-time record by transfusing his post-op patient to a hematocrit of 100%. Bowers was found at his victory party, galloping around the room,...
Oncologist Dr. Trump: Making Your Body Great Again
NEW YORK, NY - Dr. Trump makes his rounds through the halls of NYU's hospital and you can overhear his barking: "Cisplatin you're FIRED, it's a non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, start R-CHOP."
GomerBlog was lucky enough to...
American Red Cross Creates American Brown Cross for Fecal Transplant Donations
WASHINGTON, DC - Despite increasing clinician awareness and education as well as instituting universal gloving procedures, hospital-associated Clostridium difficile infections have continued to be a major source of morbidity and mortality in the United...
CBC To Be Replaced By Cheaper Incomplete Blood Count
NASHVILLE, TN - Looking to save a few dollars here and there in order to hire more hospital administrators, leadership at Nashville Medical Center (NMC) will replace the "overused and overpriced" complete blood count (CBC) with...
Study: Anticoagulation Initiation Instantly Increases Your Fall Risk
BOCA RATON, FL - Finally proving what most doctors already have suspected for decades, Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram presented his research data which demonstrated the direct causative link between initiating systemic anticoagulation and fall risk. "My study...
Oncologist Baffled by Cryptic Writing on Chart: DNR/DNI
NEAR SHORE MEDICAL CENTER, MANHASSET, NY - Dr. Kim Okemo was perplexed to find six cryptic letters on the chart of a 92-year-old patient. "DNR/DNI?" uttered Dr. Okemo, who acquired over three-thousand acronyms in...
Doctor Vows to Not Sleep Until He Finds Cure for Cancer, Retracts That, Vows...
OMAHA, NE – World famous oncologist Dr. Samuel Potter publicly vowed last week to "not sleep until I find the cure for cancer." This big announcement followed the ceremony where his famous lab was awarded...
MEDCOMIC Cartoons: Hilarious Medical Learning (Volume 2)
MEDCOMIC creator Jorge Muniz has created a funny and effective way to help study for that next test! We posted a few of his many cartoons below, and if you like them, be sure...
Brilliant Chemist Gives up Dream of Curing Cancer, Focuses Efforts on Inducing 3 ½...
CAMBRIDGE, MA - Citing practical reasons, 41-year-old renowned chemist and laboratory researcher Charles Kenzington, Ph.D. has formally ended his three-decade quest to discover a compound to destroy all malignant cells.
The decorated scientist instead plans...
New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings
ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings. “We’ve known for years that these malignancies were locally aggressive,” says lead...