Medical Specialties as Harry Potter Characters
Dolores Umbridge, Corenelius Fudge, Percy Weasley- Administration- you operate on a sliding scale of likability and we aren’t sure if you’re evil, rigid, or...
Hospital Hires Psychic to Track Pathologists’ Patient Satisfaction
LONG ISLAND, NY - Recent trends in the business of medicine have focused on the patient as the center of care. Accordingly, patient satisfaction scores...
Conspiracy! Powerful Microscope Finds “Made in China” Imprinted on Virus
ATLANTA, GA—Staring for hours at the 500,000x-magnified image of the novel coronavirus under his electron microscope, Dr. Henry Thomson of the CDC just could...
Pathology Duty Pager Goes Off Overnight
SAN DIEGO, CA - In a rare, unexpected occurrence, the pathology duty pager went off at 11 p.m. last night, disturbing the quiet slumber of...
New Journal of Negative Studies Announced
BOSTON, MA - The medical community is abuzz today with the announcement of the new Journal of Negative Studies. The journal, which will focus...
CDC Guidelines Using Pathologists as Model for ‘Extreme Social Distancing’
ATLANTA, GA - With point of care testing for SARS-CoV-2 drastically lagging behind patient demand, experts at the CDC are urging the public to help...
Olympic Officials Apologize for Pools Filled with Blood
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - Rio Olympic officials have once again apologized profusely for all of the Olympic swimming pools being filled with blood...
Blood Bank to Require More Paperwork, First-Born Child to Release Blood Products
GREENSBORO, NC - In an effort to cut down on costly blood product utilization, hospital administrators at Rocky High Hospital have put pressure on...
Medical Examiners Lobby For Law Requiring Forensic Crime Shows To Be In Smell-O-Vision
WASHINGTON, DC - “An important aspect that pervades every nook and cranny of our career is the putrid stench of rotting human flesh, and...
Pathologist Performing Autopsy Requests More Tissue
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Internal medicine resident, Dr. Cynthia Talbot, was surprised to receive a call from pathology about her patient. It had only been...