Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult

0
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked.  It is the end of the day and...
fresh-squeezed frozen plasma

Outdoor Blood Bank Stand Offers Fresh-Squeezed Frozen Plasma

0
KNOXVILLE, TN - In the hopes of luring more patients, Knoxville General Hospital has setup an outdoor blood bank stand boasting that their frozen...
angry surgeon

New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings

0
ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings.  “We’ve known...
autopsy

Pathologist Makes Patient NPO After Midnight for Autopsy in the Morning

0
NASHVILLE, TN - In an effort to minimize aspiration and prevent any further delays in management, forensic pathologist Dr. Jason Martin has made his...

Video: Thrift Lab (Parody)

0
What, pathologists are people? And they are hilarious?!?!?! Check this unbelievable rap parody by the UF pathology team, and if you've seen it before,...
lab tests

Local Woman: ‘I Need All My Labs Drawn’

1
EAST LANSING, MI – Local patient Sheryl Harris came to clinic today with a chief complaint of "I need all my labs drawn." When questioned...

Placenta Accidentally Sent to Hospital Cafeteria

3
ATLANTA, GA – Officials at Atlanta Health Cardiac Hospital (AHCH) regrettably informed the public about a terrible mix-up that occurred yesterday.  24-year-old Amy Fairbanks gave birth...
anesthesiologist intubating

Frustrated with Memes, Pathologist Intubates Crashing Covid Patient

0
We are providing continuing coverage from the BestEver Hospital as the aftermath of this morning’s events unfolds. “Alright, sure, yeah that might have been how...
ridiculously restrictive transfusion

Surprise! Ridiculously Restrictive Transfusion Threshold of Zero Associated with Death

0
BOSTON, MA - In a truly eye-opening study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the results of which no one could have...

Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies

0
ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency."  They are coming off of...