Joint Commission Cites Itself as a Major Hindrance to Medical Care

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CHICAGO, IL - This past Thursday, the Joint Commission officially cited itself as a major obstacle for patient care and safety.  The Joint Commission released in...
crying infant

Crying Baby Really Trying to Say ‘I Hate You!’

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NEW HAVEN, CT – A new study just published in Pediatrics this month demonstrated that countless parent’s suspicions and anxieties were absolutely correct: When infants cry,...
Salmonella Special

Cafeteria’s Salmonella Special Particularly Tasty Today

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MIAMI, FL - Staff at Miami Medical Center are impressed with the hospital cafeteria's offerings today, which include the usual stalwarts like the Burnt...
runner's high

Person Going for Run in 95-Degree Weather Clearly Doesn’t Have Decision-Making Capacity

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ATHENS, GA - Clearly not considering dire consequences like severe hydration, heat stroke, and heat exhaustion, runner Michael Rabdo has shown he does not...
charting more charting meaning of life

Scientists, Spiritual Leaders Unlock Meaning of Life: Charting, More Charting

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AMSTERDAM, NETHERLANDS - A week-long meeting of the world's leading scientists, scholars, and spiritual leaders at The Hague has culminated in a solution to mankind's...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Recommends Against All Human Interaction

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ATLANTA, GA - Citing people as a major cause of epidemics, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) hopes to eliminate infections once and...

Breaking: Covid-19 found in toilet paper

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Cleveland, OH - Cleveland Clinic has developed a better and faster coronavirus test. With better testing available scientists have not only tested people but...
vanc Zosyn

ID to Prescribe Way More Vanc & Zosyn in 2020

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ARLINGTON, VA - Gomerblog is thrilled to report that the Infectious Diseases Society of America (IDSA) has officially revealed their New Year's Resolution, and...
gluten allergy

After Binging on Pizza and Beer, Local Man Claims to Have Gluten Allergy

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BERKELEY, CA – Local resident Charles Longfellow is no stranger to beer.  “A typical weekend I’ll go through a couple cases,” he told reporters...
mars

NASA Plans to Build a Skilled Nursing Facility on Mars

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MERRITT ISLAND, FL - Scientists have been planning a human mission to Mars for exploration and habitation for decades.  Successful travel to and habitation of...