Breaking: CDC Warns of Cooties Outbreak in Children
ATLANTA, GA - Parents pay close attention: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has issued a new warning to the American public against...
Impoverished Village Featured in its 500th Medical School Admission Essay
MKUYUNI, MWANZA REGION, TANZANIA - A rural Tanzanian village is celebrating a major milestone today: being featured in its 500th medical school admission essay.
The village, with...
CDC Official: I Want You to Think Really Hard as You Personally Battle Ebola
Hi. I work for the CDC and I was assigned to your case I traveled from Atlanta as soon as I heard the news....
Atlanta Uses Heparin Bridge for Collapsed, Subtherapeutic Part of I-85
ATLANTA, GA - Nearly 24 hours after a massive fire engulfed and collapsed a section of I-85 Northbound near Piedmont Road, rendering it subtherapeutic and...
COVID-19 Update: Palliative Care Makes U.S. DNR
ATLANTA, GA - Accepting that COVID-19 is progressing despite all of our best efforts, Palliative has been consulted and has officially made the United...
Pokemon Go Video Game Gets People To Go Outside
CHICAGO, IL - Doctors are flabbergasted by what Nintendo has achieved. For years, they have been telling patients to stop playing video games and...
Hospitals Now Offering Official Sponsorship
DENVER, CO - Historically hospitals have struggled to stay afloat, and have strived to maintain adequate staffing. Looking for answers, hospital administrators of St. Mary’s Hospital...
New Movantik (The Poop Medication) Commercial – Parody
Naloxegol or Movantik was made famous during the Super Bowel when we were all graced with a constipation ad to help fight the opioid...
Secret of Successful Weight Loss Clinic: Tape Worms
CARINGTON, IL - Recent controversy regarding a famous weight loss clinic, Let’s Knock It Off!, has the media in a buzz. Let’s Knock It Off! has been...
CDC Recommends Against Finding Hypodermic Needles in a Haystack
ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says there is minimal risk associated with the search for a regular needle in...