Conrad Murray Hired Promoting Exclusive Anesthesia Use for Propofol

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HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Conrad Murray, a smooth criminal, has been released from jail following his two-year sentence for the death of Michael Jackson.  He has been unable to...
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Atlanta Uses Heparin Bridge for Collapsed, Subtherapeutic Part of I-85

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ATLANTA, GA - Nearly 24 hours after a massive fire engulfed and collapsed a section of I-85 Northbound near Piedmont Road, rendering it subtherapeutic and...
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CDC Predicts 2019 New Year’s Resolution Noncompliance Rate of 100%

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ATLANTA, GA - First, the Centers of Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) wants to wish everyone a Happy and Healthy New Year before it...
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Trump Proposes ‘Depo Drones’ as Means to Curb Welfare Expenditures

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NEW YORK, NY -  Presidential-hopeful Donald Trump continues to make noise as the GOP front runner, as he yesterday announced a novel, if not...

Damn It! All U.S. COVID-19 Samples Coming Back Hemolyzed

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ATLANTA, GA - Just when there was a glimmer of hope that we might finally make some progress with the diagnostic testing of patients...
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CDC Recommends Against Licking Eyeballs

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ATLANTA, GA - Say it isn't so!  The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has just announced that it cannot and will not...

COVID-19 Tips: What to Do When No Facemasks Are Available

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The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has delineated initial steps on what to do when no N95 respirators or facemasks are available,...
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If Elected, Trump to Appoint Jenny McCarthy as Surgeon General

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NEW YORK, NY - In a move which further establishes his anti-vaccine stance, Donald Trump announced yesterday that, if elected, he plans to appoint...
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Wearing Santa Hat Not Curative for Burnout, Career Dissatisfaction

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BOSTON, MA - A new study published in a special Christmas edition of the New England Journal of Burnout has unfortunately found that wearing...

New OpenBed Medical App May Revolutionize Hospital Visits

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The makers of OpenTable, the world’s leading provider of dining reservations online, have released a new healthcare-based website and medical...