Joint Commission Mandates All Patients Be Known As Bob

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - The Joint Commission today released new guidelines for protecting patient privacy.  The guidelines mandate that all hospitalized patients be known...
Chart of Death

Coroner Cause of Death: ‘Physical Therapy Note Missing Date and Time’

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ALBUQUERQUE, NM - GomerBlog regretfully reports on a hospital death that could have been saved if the physical therapy note was dated and timed...
cryptocurrency meningitis

Bitcoin Users Infected with Cryptocurrency Meningitis

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ATLANTA, GA - Over the past month, volatile swings in bitcoin have led to an ominous halving of its value, which has thrown investors...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Reminder: ‘Sleep Tight and Definitely Do Not Let the Bed Bugs Bite’

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ATLANTA, GA - Tonight, shortly after reading the public a bedtime story, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) wanted to say "Good night!"...
Olympics

STDs Running Rampant in Sochi Olympic Village

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SOCHI, RUSSIA – Apparently what happens in Sochi doesn’t always stay there.  Olympic athletes have been going at it strong and GomerBlog is sad...

Mob Boss Agrees to Shoot Man in Kneecaps Before Weekend

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CHICAGO, IL - "I swore off horse races for 10 years, but I relapsed," Sam Hemsworth told us from his wheelchair.  "Before I knew...

Clinic Patient Brings Meds in McDonald’s Bag, Must Be Compliant

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NEW YORK, NY - At 8:35 AM this morning, patient Philip Kruger showed up to his primary care clinic appointment with his medications stuffed...

Blood Banks Bring Green Blood to Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day

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CHICAGO, IL - The Chicago River has been dyed green to celebrate St. Patrick's Day every year since 1962.  Borrowing the idea to bring...
trump

If Elected, Trump to Appoint Jenny McCarthy as Surgeon General

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NEW YORK, NY - In a move which further establishes his anti-vaccine stance, Donald Trump announced yesterday that, if elected, he plans to appoint...

Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab

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SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out.  Pay was decreasing and vacation...