Thursday, March 28, 2024
Helps Makes Life Clearer

Doctor Actually Thinks He Is Saving Lives

0
WORCESTER, MA - Dr. Danny Trenda, a recent Tufts University Medical School graduate, told friends at Tony’s Tavern that he was saving lives.  His friends, unimpressed, ordered another round.  Dr. Trenda went on to talk...

Hospitalist Abusing Copy and Paste in Paper Charts

7
CAPE COD, MA - A hospitalist at Cape Cod Medical Center, Dr. Chris Gallagher, has been under heavy scrutiny after being accused several weeks ago by his own hospital staff of abusing "copy and...

Hospital Custodial Manager: ‘I Love Irritating the S**t Out of Them’

7
CLEVELAND, OH - GomerBlog reporters are able to confirm that custodial staff at Memorial Hospital do indeed intentionally buff floors and clean bathrooms at the most inopportune time.  Head custodial manager Wilson Mayers accidentally...

Overdose Victim Mutters ‘Don’t Give Me Narcan’ as Medics Arrive on the Scene

0
SEATTLE, WA - Emergency medical services (EMS) told reporters yesterday that they received another call to Ned Smith’s residence, a local ER frequent flyer, after neighbors reported abnormally abnormal behavior.  When a 9-1-1 operator gets a call...

Resident Fails Rotation for Forgetting to Place TPN Orders by 10 AM

0
MIAMI, FL - Mercy Hospital made a decision to fail Dr. Andy Oppenheimer yesterday after he once again forgot to put total parenteral nutrition (TPN) orders in by 10 AM.  The parenteral nutrition patients on his...
Fibro storm

Internal Medicine Resident Calls Rheumatology Fellow In at 2:00 AM for Fibromyalgia Patient “Fibro...

0
KANSAS CITY, KS - “I was just tired of dealing with her,” internal medicine resident Dr. Kara Gifford said.  “She is allergic to every pain medication except Dilaudid; in fact she has 15 allergies!” It was...
medical students

New Personal Statement Formula Wows Medical Residency Program Directors

13
NEW YORK, NY - A new U.S. News and World Report survey has projected that the 2015 Medical Residency Match rate will likely hit 100% with nearly all applicants matching into their first choice program.  Preliminary survey...

Local Nurse and Intern Declare EMR Documentation War‏

27
COOPERSTOWN, NY - Citing a "clearly aggressive nursing note" which was felt to be "the absolute last straw," medical intern Edward Costa formally declared a documentation war on nurse Catherine Ragaz at 12:03 this morning. Costa reports...

Newly Promoted General Surgeon’s Business Cards, A Little Too True

2
LOS ANGELES, CA – UCLA’s newly promoted general surgeon, Assistant Professor William Heffner, just received his updated business cards today.  An unfortunate error in spacing caused much controversy.  Due to the lack of room...

Newly-Diagnosed One-Handed Man: Totally Worth it

0
CUMMING, GA – Doctors on Saturday struggled to find out why patient Robert Shaffer lost his hand.  Dr. Virginia Sullivan, an intern on the team, told reporters: "We asked Robert what happened, but he...