hospital party

Attendings Gather for Annual “Housestaff Fantasy” Draft

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Twelve attendings from Piermont Valley Hospital gathered in the hospital library last Tuesday at 7:30 pm for their annual "Fantasy Housestaff" Draft. Dr. Tom Droca,...
surgery resident

Signs You May Be a Surgery Resident

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If you have ever thanked God for the presence of a CRNA student and their multiple A-line attempts because it gave you time to...
troponin bump

Intern Has Mild Troponin Bump Over Patient’s Mild Troponin Bump

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NASHVILLE, TN - After seeing her patient with chest pain develop a mild troponin bump up to 0.25 on this morning's set of labs,...

Fake News: Tiger Wasn’t Pulled Over for DUI, He Was Post-Call

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PALM BEACH, FL - Reports have surfaced that CNN's original claim that Tiger Woods was arrested for driving under the influence are false.  It...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

New CDC Recommendation: Ignore Patients with Pain > 4

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a new recommendation on the heels of March's "CDC Guideline for...

Sick of Scrub Machine Malfunctions Resident Gets Scrubs Tattooed on Body

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CALIFORNIA CITY, CA - Jonathan Marconi, an anesthesia resident at the world-famous University of California at University of California (UCUC) Medical Center, had become...
signed off sign off

“New Intern” Added to Patient’s Problem List

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Joining the ranks of “Congestive Heart Failure,” “Chronic Kidney Disease III,” and “Mood Disorder (Unspecified),” local patient Summer Days’ inpatient active problem list has...

The 7 Stages of Grief When Faced with an Admission

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The Rübler-Koss model or 7 stages of grief is a series of emotional stages an admitting attending experiences when faced with an impending admission....
Rudolph the Brown-Nosed Intern

Learn the Lyrics to “Rudolph the Brown-Nosed Intern”

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Are you ready to sing along to this Christmas classic?!  MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Intro You know Thomas and Becky and Patrick and Vicki Connie and Colin and...

Match Applicants Shocked to Find Med School Personal Statement Was Legally Binding

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In a stunning reversal of fortune, fourth-year medical students around the country are reacting to the shocking news that their medical school admission essays...