Seven Blunders

New battery-free pager powered by residents’ sweat and tears.

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In a seemingly limitless display of fiscal ingenuity, hospital administrators have invented a battery-free pager. Administrators have long lamented the hundreds of dollars wasted...
medical student

In Catastrophic Med-School Blunder, Student Gives Actual Feedback About Rotation

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In a rare but highly consequential faux pas, third-year medical student Kevin Garlander gave his actual opinion when asked about the quality of his...
autopsy

Nationwide Recall of Cadavers Issued After One Found Alive in Anatomy Lab

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ENCINO, CA—A nationwide recall of human cadavers was issued today after a petrified group of anatomy students at a California medical school discovered a...
doctors teaching

Tips for Interns: How to Respond to Your Attending’s Questions

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Here are a few short cases to help out our new interns! CASE 1 Your attending asks you during floor rounds: “What can you tell me about...
remote village

Impoverished Village Featured in its 500th Medical School Admission Essay

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MKUYUNI, MWANZA REGION, TANZANIA - A rural Tanzanian village is celebrating a major milestone today: being featured in its 500th medical school admission essay. The village, with...
Physical therapy hyperacute rehab

PT and OT File for Divorce

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PITTSBURGH, PA - In news that is making banner headlines in society pages nationwide and has left medical high society shocked and incredulous, Physical...
resting bitch face

Resting Bitch Face Underdiagnosed in Health Care Providers

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NEW YORK, NY - Despite the numerous advances and medical breakthroughs in 2015, GomerBlog reports that resting bitch face (RBF), a horrible affliction in...

How to F***ing Shine on the Wards: A Med Student Guide to Getting Honors

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We all want that coveted “H.” Here’s how to be a star on the wards: 1. On the first day of rotation, don’t forget the...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...