Hangry Intern Opens Up Vintage Packet of Graham Crackers from 1981
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Figuring that there was no better time to celebrate than during this particular overnight call, University of California, San Francisco (UCSF)...
“New Intern” Added to Patient’s Problem List
Joining the ranks of “Congestive Heart Failure,” “Chronic Kidney Disease III,” and “Mood Disorder (Unspecified),” local patient Summer Days’ inpatient active problem list has...
Super-Aerodynamic White Coat to Shave Seconds Off Rounds
WASHINGTON, DC - With the completion of the Sochi Olympics and the success of their “Mach 39” high-tech aerodynamic suits in propelling U.S. speedskaters...
Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home
PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...
Tired Medicine Resident Writes 1 Progress Note About 15 Patients
BALTIMORE, MD - A third-year medicine resident at Johns Hopkins University, Geno Smulison, completely exhausted from a busy inpatient teaching service this month and...
Surgeon Caught Screaming at Nobody, Claims “Practice”
BOISE, ID - In a bizarre incident last Thursday, Dr. Nikki Ivanovich, a general surgeon at St. Luke’s Hospital was caught by staff screaming...
Due to Late Consult, Psychiatrist Leaves Hospital After 3 PM
Psychiatry resident Dr. David Smith left the hospital around 3:30pm today, after arriving at about 11 am. At press time Dr. Smith could not...
Med Student Avoids Pelvic Exam for Record 1,429th Straight Day
KANSAS CITY, MO - Fourth-year medical student Rick Hansen ain't no dummy. He even says it himself: "I ain't no dummy." Like most medical...
Ask a Drug Seeker
Dear Drug Seeker,
I’m really concerned about the Zika virus and the Summer Olympics going on as scheduled. Do you think this is a good...
