Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...
Resident’s White Coat Shortened in New Public Shaming Tactic
HOUSTON, TX - In an imaginative new tactic to publicly shame his residents, orthopedic surgeon Dr. Scott Winslow has started reducing the length of his...
Attractive Medical Student Only Gets ‘High Pass’
PHILADELPHIA, PA - An attractive third-year medical student, Layla Maloney, is garnering much attention after receiving only a “high pass” in her Medicine clerkship. ...
Overdose Victim Mutters ‘Don’t Give Me Narcan’ as Medics Arrive on the Scene
SEATTLE, WA - Emergency medical services (EMS) told reporters yesterday that they received another call to Ned Smith’s residence, a local ER frequent flyer, after neighbors...
So You Dropped Your Pager into the Toilet, What to Do Next
You're on-call, but before sh*t hits the fan, you hit the toilet. Just when you're pulling up your pants or fixing your belt, you...
July Intern: ‘Potassium is Either 4 or 14’
KEARNEY, NE - Residency is full of minute details and keeping these all together is hard when you're just starting out. So no surprise...
In Attempt to Reach Out to Cards, Medicine Resident Falls Out of Chair
BOSTON, MA - In an aging population that is becoming increasingly complex, it is not uncommon for inpatient primary teams taking care of patients...
Teaching Team Consults Magic 8-Ball for Assistance
NEW YORK, NY - "Will my patient need placement?" intern Jamie Dreessen asked the Magic 8-Ball, shaking it solidly for 15-seconds before placing it on...
Surgical Chief Resident Calls for ‘Baywatch CPR’ on the 98-Year-Old Nursing Home Patient Admitted...
As the first wave of respondents to the “code blue” call arrived at the 7 North nursing station, Dr. Stephanie Smith was overheard saying,...
Breaking: Iron Man Diagnosed with Hemochromatosis
NEW YORK, NY - After his primary care physician insist he undergo several tests over the past month to uncover the cause of his...