Med Student Avoids Pelvic Exam for Record 1,429th Straight Day

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KANSAS CITY, MO - Fourth-year medical student Rick Hansen ain't no dummy.  He even says it himself: "I ain't no dummy."  Like most medical...
call room

After Successful Renovation, New Call Room is Now Optimized to Cause Full-On Depression

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JACKSONVILLE, FL - Convinced that being on-call isn't difficult enough in its own right, hospital administrators at Jacksonville Medical Center have successfully completed renovation of its...
When I was an intern

Old as F**k Attending Tells Team Story Called “When I Was an Intern…”

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LOS ANGELES, CA - In a story to make our current generation of residents and interns roll their eyes so hard they'll require ophthalmology...
joint commission

Joint Commission Mandates New Pain Scale That Goes to Infinity

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - The Joint Commission believes that when a patient has “20 out of 10 pain” it isn’t the patient’s fault, it’s...
DNR

Medical Team Confused as Patient Made DNR Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Members of a multidisciplinary inpatient team at Tulane University left a family meeting this morning scratching their heads, as they...

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

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Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...
snow blizzard

Teaching Hospitals To Be Staffed by Residents and Interns During Blizzard

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NEW YORK, NY - As one of the largest blizzards in history hits the east coast this weekend, many teaching hospitals are making plans...

Man Cold Severity Scale (MCSS) Released!

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  The Man-Cold or Man-Flu can be a devastating illness for half the population. New guidelines have been released to risk-stratify these patients. An objective rating...
lab results

July Intern: ‘Potassium is Either 4 or 14’

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KEARNEY, NE - Residency is full of minute details and keeping these all together is hard when you're just starting out. So no surprise...
doctor walking

Housestaff Restricted to 6000 Steps Per Day

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In an effort to balance resident wellness and service, the ACGME (Accreditation Council for Graduate Medical Education) has formally recommended limiting all housestaff to...