angry surgeon

New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings

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ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings.  “We’ve known...
stairwell at hospital

Residency Programs Nationwide Call Jeopardy to Replace New Interns Lost in Stairwells

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CHICAGO, IL - Residency programs nationwide - including but not limited to emergency medicine, family medicine, general surgery, internal medicine, neurosurgery, OB/GYN, and pediatrics...

New Intern Hands Attending Cup of Urine on Rounds

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CHICAGO, IL – New medical Intern, Dr. Alexa Friedrich, disappeared after presenting a patient to her attending physician.  She has been desperately trying to...
laughter best medicine Ativan

Breaking: Ativan is the Best Medicine, Laughter Falls to Sixth

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BOSTON, MA - Is laughter the best medicine?  Not any more.  According to a new poll of physicians and other medical providers published in the New England...

Scrubs Teaches Us That “Everything Comes Down to Poo”

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In the "My Musical" episode of Scrubs, we learn that no matter, whatever a patient suffers from, EVERYTHING comes down to poo!  Watch this clip...
intern thumb sucking

July Interns Play Crucial Role During Cardiac Arrest by Whimpering, Sucking Own Thumb

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ROCKFORD, IL - Fresh-faced July intern Becky Anderson proved to be the most crucial health care provider present during a cardiopulmonary arrest called at...
emergency physician

Dear BaconSpeak Voice Recognition Software Company

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I am an emergent see room dock door.  I am righting to let you no how much eye am in joying your voice recognition...
black cloud white cloud

Meteorologists Developing Radars to Detect Black Clouds, White Clouds

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ATLANTA, GA - In a new strategic partnership with Emory University, meteorologists at The Weather Channel (TWC) has pledged to push the boundaries of...
emoji for orthopedic surgeons interpreted

Orthopaedics to Begin to Use Emojis in Progress Notes

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CHICAGO, IL - In a progressive move by the National Orthopaedic Society of Orthopaedic Surgeons and Orthopaedists (NOSOSO), emojis have now been approved to...

ER’s New Dilaudid Salt Lick, Admissions Down 90%

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SACRAMENTO, CA - Sutter Health System is changing the game.  In a world of overcrowded ERs and the inability to triage efficiently, new innovations...