Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...
Resident Tries G-Tube Feeds: ‘Really Not That Bad’
NEW YORK, NY – In a move sure to garner mixed reactions from colleagues and staff, second-year internal medicine resident Jon Paniagua opened a...
Surgical Residency Shut Down for Possible Human Trafficking
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The General Surgery Residency of a prominent university in California is currently under federal investigation following allegations of possible human trafficking...
Intern Accused of Being a Poster Whore
OMAHA, NE - Ellis Simmons, intern in the Medicine-Pediatrics (Med-Peds) program, was discovered to be propositioning several pediatric hospitalists to work with him on...
Fortune Cookies Replace Lotto Numbers with Vital Signs
BROOKLYN, NY - In an effort to appeal to health care professionals who order Chinese food for take out because the cafeteria is closed, fortune...
Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean
Ad text
Actual meaning
Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital
The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...
Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
Physician Shocked to Learn Banana Bags Not Made with Real Fruit
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Local hospitalist Marcel Beignet was shocked and aghast to learn from colleagues today that banana bags, which are used to...
Charmin Profits As July Interns Sh*t Themselves
GREEN BAY, WI - Proctor & Gamble's toilet paper brand Charmin expects to see profits soar throughout July as new interns flood hospitals in a blazing...
Ask a Drug Seeker
Dear Drug Seeker,
I’m really concerned about the Zika virus and the Summer Olympics going on as scheduled. Do you think this is a good...