Brand New Futile Care Fellowship Created

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BOARDMAN, OH - St. Margaret Medical Center released news Thursday that a new cutting-edge fellowship training program would start. Dr. Peg Trachenline couldn’t hide her...
NBME

NBME Announces Yet Another Board Examination STEP Up 4

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - In an unexpected press release, the National Board of Medical Examiners (NBME) revealed that a new Step examination for the United...
upset doctor

Things Residency Has Stolen From Me

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Sleep... many many hours of sleep. Meals... 3 meals a day now equals one granola bar and a cup of coffee. Time… Having time to have a bowel...

Report: Essential Hypertension, Not at All Essential

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PITTSBURGH, PA - Scientists discovered Wednesday that essential hypertension is not at all essential for life.  "We were totally wrong when we discovered hypertension,"...
When I was an intern

Old as F**k Attending Tells Team Story Called “When I Was an Intern…”

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LOS ANGELES, CA - In a story to make our current generation of residents and interns roll their eyes so hard they'll require ophthalmology...
medical student

Medical Student Forgoes Last Year, Jumps to Residency Draft Early

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In an unprecedented move, John Cummings held a press conference in the student lounge to announce his decision to forgo the last year of...

Tufts Nurses Go On Strike, New Interns Forced To Be Nurses

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BOSTON, MA – Due to the recent nursing strike at Tufts Medical Center, the hospital is now forcing its new interns to also be nurses....

With First Date Going Badly, ICU Fellow Tries Albumin

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – With his date clearly not enjoying herself and losing interest in him at a rapid rate, local ICU fellow Dr....
black cloud white cloud

Meteorologists Developing Radars to Detect Black Clouds, White Clouds

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ATLANTA, GA - In a new strategic partnership with Emory University, meteorologists at The Weather Channel (TWC) has pledged to push the boundaries of...

How to F***ing Shine on the Wards: A Med Student Guide to Getting Honors

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We all want that coveted “H.” Here’s how to be a star on the wards: 1. On the first day of rotation, don’t forget the...