STAT Officially Means “Maybe”

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day? ...
medical student

Medical Student Forgoes Last Year, Jumps to Residency Draft Early

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In an unprecedented move, John Cummings held a press conference in the student lounge to announce his decision to forgo the last year of...

Intern Immediately Regrets Asking Open-Ended Question

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SAN JOSE, CA - “Hi, Mr. Jones.  Tell me about your night,” said by the stupidest, know-nothingest, why-did-I-just-do-that intern, Dr. Austin.  Austin, a new...
psychiatry resident

Due to Late Consult, Psychiatrist Leaves Hospital After 3 PM

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Psychiatry resident Dr. David Smith left the hospital around 3:30pm today, after arriving at about 11 am.  At press time Dr. Smith could not...
Iron Man hemochromatosis

Breaking: Iron Man Diagnosed with Hemochromatosis

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NEW YORK, NY - After his primary care physician insist he undergo several tests over the past month to uncover the cause of his...

Medical Team Sues Difficult Patient for Pain & Suffering

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Sometimes enough is enough.  A multidisciplinary inpatient medical team at Birmingham Medical Center (BMC) is taking difficult patient and frequent flyer Jason...
medical student

Medical Student Reports He’s ‘Just Not That Interested’ In Clinical Rotation; Attending Physicians Quit

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A shocking series of events has left Salem Teaching Hospital in complete disarray. The issues began when third-year medical student Daniel Greene bluntly stated...

Overbearing Senior Resident Unaware of Own Skill in Alienating Others

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The first day of Marcella Wallace’s dermatology rotation quickly went downhill when she was exposed to Dr. H. William Wellington-Rothschild, Jr. “Call me Chaz, everyone...
Landau

Lab Coats Now Available in Brand New Colors

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MEMPHIS, TN - Like the stethoscope, the white lab coat has not only been a magnet for bodily fluids and random food products, but...