Saturday, April 20, 2024

Emergency Medicine

Emergency Room Bingo!

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Getting burned out working in the ED?  Make sure to pull out your ED Bingo cards and play!
paper cut level VIII trauma center

Level VIII Trauma Center Can Only Take Care of Paper Cuts Really

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SANDERSVILLE, GA - Sandersville Medical Center, a recently-opened Level VIII Trauma Center located two hours southwest of Atlanta, barely has any resources whatsoever and only really has the capacity to take care of simple...

What Type of Emergency Room Patient Are You?

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Take this quiz to see how your local ER feels about you! 1. When I arrive to the Emergency Room: a. I have no idea what to do b. I walk up to the desk and then...

Former United Security Guard Landed on Feet as Nurse-Assaulting Cop

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SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Former United Security Guard and all-around jerk-face Jeff Payne was very concerned he wouldn't be able to find employment after all the bad publicity he got when he knocked out...
em entrance

Frequent Fliers Hired to Evaluate Emergency Medicine Residents

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ST. PAUL, MN - Responding to feedback that existing resident assessments were not properly evaluating the attendings of tomorrow in how they adapt to important trends in medicine, the University of Minnesota Emergency Medicine (EM)...

Tragedy as Strong Gust of Wind Kills Hundreds of Umbrellas

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CHICAGO, IL - Tragedy struck the Illinois metropolis today as a light drizzle suddenly gave way to a surprisingly strong fifteen-second gust of wind off of Lake Michigan, killing 74 unsuspecting umbrellas and injuring several...

Trump Tweets About Several Medical Specialties

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Trump is at it again.  This time it involves tweets regarding several medical specialties. Enjoy!
Superman Kryptonite subclavian steal

Nurse Adds Kryptonite to Superman’s Allergy List

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METROPOLIS, US - During an initial evaluation at Metropolis Medical Center (MMC) where the Man of Steel Superman presented to the emergency room with generalized weakness, ER nurse Bethany Richardson astutely concluded that the frequent...

Canadian Provinces Presenting to the Emergency Room

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British Columbia: 43-year-old female worried she accidentally overdosed on Gingko baba when she took two times the amount on her way to yoga. Feeling tingly inside. Alberta: 30-year-old male requesting medication refill for Ativan. Here...
turkey sandwich haldol diets

Know Your Hospital Diets

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It can be confusing telling apart all those different hospital diets, so here's a primer to break down some of the most common ones. Clear Liquid Diet - This diet consists of transparent liquids: water,...