Emergency Medicine

woman with common cold

Woman with a Cold Thoroughly Fills Out ED Comment Card

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Mandy Tremboll, a suburbanite fighter for justice with absolutely no situational awareness, had the audacity to fill out a comment card after her "very disappointing" 4.5 hour experience in the ED...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

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Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway exploring the telemetric spectrum, first with alternating doses of bradycardia...
hospital administrator

Hospital Administrators Chastise Emergency, Surgical & Medical Staff for Patient Satisfaction Scores Lagging Behind...

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BOCA RATON, FL - Staff from three departments - Emergency, Surgery & Internal Medicine - received scathing criticism from hospital administrators at today's monthly meeting for allowing their patient satisfaction scores to "lag behind" the...
diabetes

Major Hospitals Caught in Diabetes Scandal

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SUGARVILLE, TX - The Hershey Memorial Hospital (HMH) has been cited in a nationwide investigation by the CDC. The investigation is a result of patient complaints to the CDC nationwide.  "There have been many, many patients...
defibrillator

ICU Team Develops Defibrillator With New Setting: The Slow Code Mode

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PHOENIX, AZ - Luck of the Lady Hospital in Arizona has begun to trial a defibrillator developed by a few of its seasoned staff, The Zoll 990 with a coveted setting, the slow code...
io access

Intern Places Wrong IO Access, Gets Intraocular Access by Mistake‏

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AUSTIN, TX  - In yet another case of medical “whoops-a-daisy” late last night, intern Alex Franklin mistook his supervising resident’s order to obtain emergency IO access during a cardiopulmonary arrest for intraocular access, and...
times square work note

Work Note Center Opens in Times Square, Deadbeats Rejoice

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NEW YORK, NY – What’s all the commotion in Times Square?  Not another Naked Cowboy, it’s the new Walk-In Work Note Center.  Based on the model of walk-in urgent care centers, patrons are lining...

Pez Introduces New Pocket Percocet Dispenser

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EAST ORANGE, NJ - The Pez candy company announced its first upgraded dispenser design in decades last week, as the candymaker looks to tap into the immense market of opioid-dependent consumers across the globe. Starting...
crazy ICD-10 diagnosis

‘Crazy’ Added to ICD-10, Right Next to ‘Dr. Oz Says’ Code

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Clinicians around the country were happy to learn that "Crazy" has been added to the upcoming ICD-10 codes, a most recent update to International Classification of Diseases used extensively in the...