Medical Specialties as Harry Potter Characters
Dolores Umbridge, Corenelius Fudge, Percy Weasley- Administration- you operate on a sliding scale of likability and we aren’t sure if you’re evil, rigid, or caught up in the wrong place at the wrong time....
HHS Announces New Crack Down on Illicit Cardiac Massage Parlors
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Officials from the Department of Health and Human Services Monday announced a joint operation with Departments of Homeland Security and the Federal Bureau of Investigation to crack down on illicit cardiac...
Psychiatrist Joins WWE and Puts Opponent in a Mental Health Hold
LUBBOCK, TX – Finally fed up with all the bullying he was receiving from general surgeons, Dr. Froyd abandoned his post as Consultation-Liaison Psychiatrist at Lubbock General Hospital for a more lucrative career in...
Area Doctor Now Apologizes Before Every Consult
MARKERSBURG, TN - Dr. Lois Siento thinks she has the key to improving relationships between primary teams and consultants.
"It's simple," she explains. "We give consultant business. Consultants like to get cases from us that...
United Airlines Introduces Seats That Go Into Trendelenburg
CHICAGO, IL - Seeking new ways to remain controversial and constantly in the news, United Airlines has announced it is has replaced passenger seats with brand new seats that go all the way into...
Breaking: VA Pick Ronny Jackson Withdraws from Both Nomination, Opioids
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the "baseless and anonymous attacks on my character" as well as intractable abdominal cramps, lacrimation, and rhinorrhea, White House physician Rear Admiral Ronny Jackson has announced he is withdrawing from both...
A Practical Guide to Intravenous Line Insertion for Interns by a Cynical Resident Post...
1. Decide if you really need the line. You can use this simple test. Approach your senior doctor and say, “The patient has really tough veins… I don't know if I can do it.”...
United Airlines Replaces Oxygen Masks with Endotracheal Tubes
CHICAGO, IL - No stranger to controversy, United Airlines has thrown itself into the headlines once again by announcing that it will be replacing oxygen masks in the panels above passengers' seats with endotracheal...
ER Doc Closes Papercut with 14 Stitches to Protect Gang Member’s Street Cred
Los Angeles, CA- Jose “Mierda Verde” Sinhuevos is one of the most feared member of the West Hollywood Nacho Libre Street gang.
Last week while reading his the latest issue of the Chulo Weekly newsletter,...
CDC Bans Certain Phrases from Use by Patients in the Emergency Department
Failure to adhere to these and other evidence-based rules could lead to fines, imprisonment, or to patients losing their entitlement to high quality emergency medical care. These “science-based” rules apply to vulnerable patients of...