Hospitalists Aim to Place All Americans by 2020
PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Society of Hospital Medicine (SHM) has announced a new multibillion-dollar PBP initiative, which stands for "Place, Baby, Place!", with the ultimate goal of placing all 300 million Americans in nursing...
Patient Satisfaction Survey Study Halted, Mortality Increased 238% with Patient Satisfaction
LOS ANGELES, CA - "We have to halt this study immediately!" was a warning issued by lead researcher, Dr. Hans Willford from UCLA. "Long-term mortality rates are sky rocketing over our placebo groups."
In an effort...
New Research Shows That Anti-Vax Housewives Were Right All Along!
MARIN COUNTY, CA - Tiffany Davis was relieved today when she heard from her friend Courtney Brown at their children’s Gymboree class that Courtney had heard from Lindsay who heard from Kelsey that an...
23 Million Americans Watch Royal Wedding, No Decline In Patient Care Among ROAD Docs...
With the estimation that 23 million Americans had their eyes glued to the television to watch the royal wedding of Meghan Markle and Prince Harry, Gomerblog set out to study how this impacted patient...
Breaking: Hulk Hogan Has Hulkadepression
BEVERLY HILL, CA - After several decades of recurrent episodes of Hulkamania, retired pro-wrestler Hulk Hogan has been formally diagnosed with his first episode of Hulkadepression.
"With both episodes...
EMR Seeks Upgrade in Physician Users
In a breathtaking technological leap, the EMR Purgatory recently shut down all screens at City Hospital in order to send the message: ‘Please upgrade users.’ IT staff were stunned, at first by the apparent...
Top 8 Reasons to Become a Nurse
SILVER SPRING, MD – The American Nurses Association released results of its biennial Workforce Trends and Findings (WTF) survey on Monday. The survey polled nurses from all over the United to determine their reasons...
Scooter Harvest Ride for Organ Donation
NASHVILLE, TN--The United Network for Organ Sharing announced today plans to unroll 500 dockless electric scooters for ride sharing purposes in major metropolitan cities that have robust transplant programs. This new brand, Harvest Ride,...
Local Nurse and Intern Declare EMR Documentation War
COOPERSTOWN, NY - Citing a "clearly aggressive nursing note" which was felt to be "the absolute last straw," medical intern Edward Costa formally declared a documentation war on nurse Catherine Ragaz at 12:03 this morning.
Costa reports...
Norovirus and a Patient’s Oxygen Saturation of 33% Too Much for Anesthesiologist to Handle
BOSTON, MA - Norovirus is running rampant throughout the country this January and anesthesiologist Tim Bellows became the next poor victim to become infected. He was midway through a laparoscopic appendectomy when he felt...
