Hospital Administration

hospital administrators

Jealous of Nurses Week, Hospital Administrators Plan to Create Administrators Week

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ATLANTA, GA - Jealous of all the attention registered nurses (RNs) have received during Nurses Week, hospital administrators nationwide are hoping to create an Administrators Week to celebrate their contributions to healthcare.  Though hospital...
hospital staff meeting

Mandatory Hospital Staff Meeting to Improve Morale Fails to Improve Morale

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COLUMBIA, SC - ED Staff at Our Lady of Gluten Intolerance Hospital (OLGIH) finished yet another required but uncompensated hospital staff meeting last week at the behest of OLGIH administration.  The meeting was called...
patient satisfaction flag

Al Qaeda Claims Responsibility For Patient Satisfaction Surveys

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GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA - A detainee with confirmed ties to Al Qaeda made claims yesterday that the group operates an American corporation designed to destroy the U.S. health care delivery system from the inside....
hospital administrator

Hospital Administrators Chastise Emergency, Surgical & Medical Staff for Patient Satisfaction Scores Lagging Behind...

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BOCA RATON, FL - Staff from three departments - Emergency, Surgery & Internal Medicine - received scathing criticism from hospital administrators at today's monthly meeting for allowing their patient satisfaction scores to "lag behind" the...
ambulance

EMS Now Being Dispatched to Transport Satisfaction Surveys‏

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HUNTERSVILLE, NC - Last week, emergency medical crews accepted a new challenge in this suburban North Carolina community.  At the behest of health care administrators who decided that patient satisfaction data collection is "the...
hospital administrators

Prezz-Gainey Releases Hospital Administrator Satisfaction Survey

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CASH MOUNTAIN, MA - With much excitement, Shirley Survey, MBA, M$, JD of Prezz Gainey (PG) announced the release of the much anticipated Hospital Administrator Satisfaction Survey.  “Following the enormous impact of the Patient...

Hospital Administrators Bring Hope & Quality to Remote African Village

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BAALAH, KENYA - A medical mission trip made up entirely of hospital administrators has just returned to America after a week serving the needy in a remote African village. “You hear all the time about the great work...
miss universal healthcare

Miss Management Crowned Miss Universal Healthcare

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BOSTON, MA - Miss Management of Hospital Administration has been crowned Miss Universal Healthcare, beating out Miss Hap of General Surgery, Miss Understanding of Internal Medicine, and contestants from over 60 other subspecialties across...
PGA pro turns hospital administrator

PGA Pro Becomes Hospital Administrator to Make More Money, Play More Golf

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SCOTTSDALE, AZ - After three mediocre years on the Tour, 28-year-old PGA pro Blake Johnson announced that he is calling it quits and starting a new career in hospital administration. Johnson explained his rationale with...
doctors and administrators clapping

Hospital Administrators Think High Healthcare Costs Fixed by Hiring More Hospital Administrators

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WASHINGTON, DC - CEOs of major US hospitals are breaking their silence and coming out in favor of hiring more hospital administrators.  CEO of Memorial Hospital in Chicago, Tammy Watkinson, is certain the fix...