Hospital Administrators Consider Renaming MDs to “Morphine & Dilaudid”
TAMPA, FL - Following the immense success of renaming registered nurses (RNs) to “Refreshments & Narcotics,” hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital (TMCH)...
VIP Treatment Offers Merlot, Pinot Noir as Surgical Prep
MILL VALLEY, CA - As hospitals across the country merge into corporate conglomerates, they lose their identity, much like identical Walmarts taking out Mom...
Hospital Security Successfully Lobbies for Independent Practice
Reno, NV - In a rare demonstration of bipartisan support, hospital security officers were granted full and unrestricted rights to practice police work independently...
A Modern Hippocratic Oath for Hospital Administrators
Going forward, I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this cost-saving and value-added covenant:
I am an agent of change...
Area hospital announces plans to no longer provide complimentary room air
The current trend of monitizing all aspects of human existence has spread into all corners of society, including health care. Insurance companies have required...
Hospital Opens Smoker’s Lounge for Patients
CHICAGO, IL - Lord Have Mercy Hospital has taken patient satisfaction to a whole new level by recently opening a “Smoker’s Lounge” for its...
Bed Control Totally Out of Control
BOSTON, MA – Bed Control at Massachusetts Captain Hospital (MCH) is “totally out of control,” Gomerblog reports. In fact, it’s f**king nuts.
“COME ON IN...
Patient Who Won’t Sign Consent Form Feared to Have Read It
The decision by a patient to not sign an informed consent form has left her surgeon petrified that she actually read the form. If...
Politicians, Nostalgic for the 1990s, Unanimously Support “Medicare-for-All-4-One
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of bipartisanship that is all too rare in Washington these days, Congress unanimously passed a new health insurance plan...
New EMR Implementation Going Almost As Smoothly As Promised
San Diego, CA- When Balboa Memorial Hospital announced that they would be “upgrading” to a new Electronic Medical Record (EMR) last year, there was...