Hospital Administration

Hospital Administrator Invents Time Travel to Eliminate 30 day Readmission Penalty

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The small town community of Westbrook, NC was in shock last week as its local hospital VP of operations, Mr. Emmett Brown ODB, BMF,...
the purge

The Joint Commission Announces First Annual ‘Patient Safety Purge’

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In a move sparked by the popularity of the horror movie franchise, The Purge, the Joint Commission for the Accreditation of Hospital Organizations (JCAHO)...

ED Places CT Scanners at Entrance

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COLUMBIA, SC - “It was bound to happen,” said the Chief of Emergency Medicine, Dr. Sendtu Fleur, “sooner or later, we all knew it...
smoking lounge

Hospital Opens Smoker’s Lounge for Patients

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CHICAGO, IL - Lord Have Mercy Hospital has taken patient satisfaction to a whole new level by recently opening a “Smoker’s Lounge” for its...
doctor upset

Hospital Administrators Consider Renaming MDs to “Morphine & Dilaudid”

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TAMPA, FL - Following the immense success of renaming registered nurses (RNs) to “Refreshments & Narcotics,” hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital (TMCH)...
hospital

Hospital Now Accepting Likes, Retweets as Payments

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NASHVILLE, TN - In a stunning health care coup, Stalwart Memorial Hospital has announced a new advertising campaign that is sure to change the...

Medical Team Sues Difficult Patient for Pain & Suffering

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Sometimes enough is enough.  A multidisciplinary inpatient medical team at Birmingham Medical Center (BMC) is taking difficult patient and frequent flyer Jason...
hospital administrator golfing

A Modern Hippocratic Oath for Hospital Administrators

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Going forward, I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this cost-saving and value-added covenant: I am an agent of change...
cpr

Heroic Hospital Administrator Rushes To Dying Patient To Complete Core Measures

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BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators across the country are recognizing the heroic efforts of Chlöe Less, Assistant Director of Quality Control at Madre...

Politicians, Nostalgic for the 1990s, Unanimously Support “Medicare-for-All-4-One

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WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of bipartisanship that is all too rare in Washington these days, Congress unanimously passed a new health insurance plan...