Hospital Administration

Hospital CEOs to Take Multi-Million Dollar Pay Cuts to Finance Hazard Pays

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Option 1: Just kidding. Option 2: Pressed by enormous frustration from medical staff around the country working mandatory overtime in unsafe conditions and with limited PPE,...
Doc McStuffins, Lambie

Doc McStuffins Caught Sleeping with Lambie, License Suspended

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SACRAMENTO, CA - The Medical Board of California suspended the license of Dottie "Doc" McStuffins after allegations arose that she conducted an inappropriate relationship with...
pumpkin spice

Hospitals Now Offering Seasonal Pumpkin-Spiced Patient Satisfaction Surveys

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BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators at Madre De Díos Medical Center will now offer seasonal pumpkin-spiced patient satisfaction surveys in order to improve...

Hospital Administrators Utilizing Twitter $8 Blue Checkmarks for Patient Communication

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Hospital administrators at Unitis Healthcare have implemented a new communication system for patients at all of their hospitals in the New England region. Admitted...
patient satisfaction flag

Al Qaeda Claims Responsibility For Patient Satisfaction Surveys

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GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA - A detainee with confirmed ties to Al Qaeda made claims yesterday that the group operates an American corporation designed to...
computer mouse

Cost-Cutting Savvy: IT Replacing Computer Mice with Real Mice

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Health care systems are always implementing innovative new ways to defray costs, and it turns out Los Angeles Medical Center...
airport security

JCAHO Takes Over Airport Security

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a move no one expected, JCAHO took over control of airport security today from the Transportation Security Administration. “Took over”...
pastoral care

Breaking: Inpatient Pastoral Care Team Suffering Burnout

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ATLANTA, GA - Well, folks, sh*t has hit the fan as GomerBlog is sad to report that our pastoral care teams nationwide are emotionally...

Primary Care Office Installs People Mover

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DENVER, CO - In an effort to satisfy the demands of hospital administration, the physicians at Suncare Health made the easy decision to install...
doctor notes DVT PE

Hospital Gets Rid of Patients, Doctors to Spend 100% of Time Writing Notes

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State Hospital Medical Center has made headlines across the nation today by shutting its doors to human patients.  Physicians will now spend 100% of...