Hospital Administration

drinking alcohol

Hospital Opens Bar, All Healthcare Problems Solved

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MINEOLA, NY - Some ideas are so revolutionary, they can only be conceived in a stroke of genius.  Such is the case with Northrop...
couple kissing

Worst Pick-Up Lines by Medical Subspecialty

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GomerBlog did some research on a hot and steamy topic: What are the worst pick-up lines by subspecialty?  Here goes! Allergy “I like it when you...
patient satisfaction flag

Al Qaeda Claims Responsibility For Patient Satisfaction Surveys

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GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA - A detainee with confirmed ties to Al Qaeda made claims yesterday that the group operates an American corporation designed to...
doctor notes DVT PE

Hospital Gets Rid of Patients, Doctors to Spend 100% of Time Writing Notes

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State Hospital Medical Center has made headlines across the nation today by shutting its doors to human patients.  Physicians will now spend 100% of...
wine for surgical prep

VIP Treatment Offers Merlot, Pinot Noir as Surgical Prep

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MILL VALLEY, CA - As hospitals across the country merge into corporate conglomerates, they lose their identity, much like identical Walmarts taking out Mom...
hospital ceo

Take the quiz: Are you an evil insurance company?

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1. Have you ever cancelled a preauthorization for a Monday cancer surgery….on a Friday afternoon? 2. Do you send routinely fliers to your customers extolling...
mips

A Hospital Administrator Explains: MIPS

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Hey everybody!  Are you having a good day?  I hope so.  How about this fantastic weather we're having?  Awesome, hey let’s talk about the...

Politicians, Nostalgic for the 1990s, Unanimously Support “Medicare-for-All-4-One

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WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of bipartisanship that is all too rare in Washington these days, Congress unanimously passed a new health insurance plan...
joint commission

Joint Commission Mandates New Pain Scale That Goes to Infinity

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - The Joint Commission believes that when a patient has “20 out of 10 pain” it isn’t the patient’s fault, it’s...
bellies

Doctors Mandated to Rub Patients’ Bellies to Improve Patient Satisfaction Scores

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PENSACOLA, FL - In an effort to bolster patient satisfaction scores, doctors at Sacred Heart Health System have been mandated to rub patients' bellies, say...