Al Qaeda Claims Responsibility For Patient Satisfaction Surveys
GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA - A detainee with confirmed ties to Al Qaeda made claims yesterday that the group operates an American corporation designed to...
Administrators Change Nurses’ Day to Feb 29th
CHICAGO, IL - Rush University Hospital Administrators made a recent change to the much celebrated: Nurses' Week. They eliminated existing nurses' week, May 6-12th, and...
Politicians, Nostalgic for the 1990s, Unanimously Support “Medicare-for-All-4-One
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of bipartisanship that is all too rare in Washington these days, Congress unanimously passed a new health insurance plan...
Doctors Mandated to Rub Patients’ Bellies to Improve Patient Satisfaction Scores
PENSACOLA, FL - In an effort to bolster patient satisfaction scores, doctors at Sacred Heart Health System have been mandated to rub patients' bellies, say...
Nurses, Doctors Fight Back with New Health Care Practitioner Satisfaction Surveys
NEW YORK, NY - Sick and tired of the unfair nature of patient satisfaction surveys that puts service above disease management, a multidisciplinary team...
ED Places CT Scanners at Entrance
COLUMBIA, SC - “It was bound to happen,” said the Chief of Emergency Medicine, Dr. Sendtu Fleur, “sooner or later, we all knew it...
Heroic Hospital Administrator Rushes To Dying Patient To Complete Core Measures
BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators across the country are recognizing the heroic efforts of Chlöe Less, Assistant Director of Quality Control at Madre...
Patients Unable to Pay Hospital Bill Can Stay and Do Scut Work Instead
WILMINGTON, DE—With no end in sight to the national healthcare debate, one community hospital in Wilmington, DE is experimenting with a new way for...
Hospital Opens Smoker’s Lounge for Patients
CHICAGO, IL - Lord Have Mercy Hospital has taken patient satisfaction to a whole new level by recently opening a “Smoker’s Lounge” for its...
EMS Now Being Dispatched to Transport Satisfaction Surveys
HUNTERSVILLE, NC - Last week, emergency medical crews accepted a new challenge in this suburban North Carolina community. At the behest of health care...