Hospital Administrators Utilizing Twitter $8 Blue Checkmarks for Patient Communication
Hospital administrators at Unitis Healthcare have implemented a new communication system for patients at all of their hospitals in the New England region. Admitted...
Hospital Gets Rid of Patients, Doctors to Spend 100% of Time Writing Notes
State Hospital Medical Center has made headlines across the nation today by shutting its doors to human patients. Physicians will now spend 100% of...
Hospital Administrators Consider Renaming MDs to “Morphine & Dilaudid”
TAMPA, FL - Following the immense success of renaming registered nurses (RNs) to “Refreshments & Narcotics,” hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital (TMCH)...
New Haldol Creamy Spread Added to Emergency Room Sandwiches
PROVIDENCE, RI - Health care providers are raving about a new haloperidol-based condiment that can be surreptitiously added to almost any hospital meal tray,...
Breaking News: Nurses Fight Hospital Administrators to Remove Mandated Patient-to-Nurse Ratios
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The hospital administrators at Great American Hospital (GAH) are shaking in their suits today as hundreds of RNs are picketing outside....
Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
Hospital Reimbursement to Reflect Number of Positive Posts on Social Media
Mr. Smith had just been discharged from his local hospital after a 6-day stay for detox, anxiety, failure to thrive, and chronic pain. He...
Breaking: Inpatient Pastoral Care Team Suffering Burnout
ATLANTA, GA - Well, folks, sh*t has hit the fan as GomerBlog is sad to report that our pastoral care teams nationwide are emotionally...
New CMS Regulations Force Doctors to Literally Jump Through Hoops
TACOMA, WA - Stipulations released last month by the Center for Medicare Services have added on to the already onerous documentation requirements necessary for...
Generous Administrators Upgrade Medicine Conference Room Table with Large Plywood Spool
ALBANY, NY - In a show of boundless generosity, the hospital administration has donated a large plywood spool to the internal medicine work room to...