Mood Rings Reflect Real Time Patient Satisfaction
COLUMBIA, SC - Due to lagging patient satisfaction scores and frequent complaints, County Hospital administrators are fitting every patient with a mood ring so staff...
Patients Unable to Pay Hospital Bill Can Stay and Do Scut Work Instead
WILMINGTON, DE—With no end in sight to the national healthcare debate, one community hospital in Wilmington, DE is experimenting with a new way for...
Administrators Change Nurses’ Day to Feb 29th
CHICAGO, IL - Rush University Hospital Administrators made a recent change to the much celebrated: Nurses' Week. They eliminated existing nurses' week, May 6-12th, and...
New Haldol Creamy Spread Added to Emergency Room Sandwiches
PROVIDENCE, RI - Health care providers are raving about a new haloperidol-based condiment that can be surreptitiously added to almost any hospital meal tray,...
Administrator Not Sure What To Do With Survey That Complains About Surveys
RICHMOND, VA - Administrator Craig Brown was dumbfounded yesterday when he received a survey from a patient that was treated at his hospital. The...
Hospital Discontinues MRI Screening Forms, Press-Ganey Scores Soar
In a presentation to the American Association of Gullible Hospital Administrators, Shady Practices Medical Centers reported that as a result of numerous satisfaction surveys,...
Primary Care Office Installs People Mover
DENVER, CO - In an effort to satisfy the demands of hospital administration, the physicians at Suncare Health made the easy decision to install...
Breaking: Inpatient Pastoral Care Team Suffering Burnout
ATLANTA, GA - Well, folks, sh*t has hit the fan as GomerBlog is sad to report that our pastoral care teams nationwide are emotionally...
Administrators Throw Nursing Appreciation Lunch, Nurses Too Short-Staffed to Attend
“They just don’t appreciate our appreciation!” exclaimed CEO Benjamin Green, referencing the absence of nurses as he gathered with his fellow administrators in Good...
Generous Administrators Upgrade Medicine Conference Room Table with Large Plywood Spool
ALBANY, NY - In a show of boundless generosity, the hospital administration has donated a large plywood spool to the internal medicine work room to...