Tuesday, August 11, 2020
computer mouse

Cost-Cutting Savvy: IT Replacing Computer Mice with Real Mice

LOS ANGELES, CA - Health care systems are always implementing innovative new ways to defray costs, and it turns out Los Angeles Medical Center (LAMC) has come up with the best idea yet, today...

Patients Starve to Death Due to Hospital-Wide EMR Policy

A large university hospital just lost all of its patients over the course of a month after a new policy went into place, only allowing providers to have one patient’s chart open at a...
password 500 characters

IT Requires EMR Password to be 500 Characters Long

BOSTON, MA - Reflecting what is soon-to-be standard practice at all health care systems across the country, the Information Technology Department at Massachusetts Lieutenant General Hospital (MLGH) requires that anyone accessing the electronic medical...
John Hancock Declaration of Independence

This Day in Medical History: John Hancock Co-Signs the Declaration of Independence

THIS DAY IN MEDICAL HISTORY, 1776 - On this day in both medical and American history, the President of the Second Continental Congress, John Hancock, co-signed his delegates' document as follows: "I saw and examined...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Breaking: CMS Creates New Blame Anesthesia ICD-10 Codes

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) & National Center of Health Statistics (HCHS) have created a new set of ICD-10 codes allowing non-Anesthesiology health care professionals to both blame...
Tim Penn medical scribe

Breaking: Burned-Out Medical Scribe Hires Own Medical Scribe

AUGUSTA, GA - Exhausted and admittedly burned out from taking notes for emergency room (ER) health care professionals at Augusta Medical Center, medical scribe Amy Bruckner has taken it upon herself to hire her...
life preserver life preservers

CDC Mandates Life Preservers to Avoid Drowning in Paperwork

ATLANTA, GA - The result of an alarming increase in paperwork-associated deaths by drowning, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has officially mandated that all health care professionals wear life preservers when...

Therapy Dogs Now Required to Write Progress Notes

BOSTON, MA – In another unprecedented move by the Joint Commission (JC), therapy dogs will now be required to write progress notes on the patients they see.  The move has infuriated therapy dogs all across...

IT Departments Upgrade EHRs with 28.8K Dial-Up Modems

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The information technology (IT) departments of hospitals nationwide made a New Year's resolution to hinder the efforts of practicing health care professionals like never before.  Mission accomplished: Yesterday IT departments completed...
spay neuter frightened favorite pen

Breaking: Doctor Inconsolable Over Loss of Favorite Pen

TOWSON, MD - Unable to hold back the tears welling up in his eyes since he learned of the heartbreaking news, internal medicine attending Gary Buxton was inconsolable at the nurses station over the...