Hospitalists

chest pain rule out toy elephant

Chest Pain Rule-Out: Patient with Stuffed Elephant Sitting on Chest

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DANBURY, CT - A patient at Danbury Medical Center was admitted for chest pain rule out after he was complaining of a toy stuffed...
PM&R doctor

An Internist’s Guide to STAT Overnight Pages

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At 7:30pm: So what’s the discharge plan for this patient? Follow up: Remind the nurse that you’re the overnight resident and haven’t been attending case...

Insomniac Cured After One Question, Wonders Why He Didn’t Think of It Before

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BISMARCK, ND - In an unprecedented success story, patient Igor Soapen has finally been relieved of the insomnia that plagued his life.  And he...

Ask a Hospitalist

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Dear Hospitalist, I’ve been having chest pain for the past three weeks.  I get it right in the middle of the chest, it's worse when...
baby aspirin

FDA Reminder: Baby Aspirin Not Actually Meant for Babies

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SILVER SPRING, MD - Looking to clear things up to the confused American public, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has issued a reminder that...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...
tuck patient

Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home

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PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...
veterinarian

Veterinarian Turfs German Shepherd to Hospital Medicine

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN - Hospitalists at Minnesota Healthcare suffered one more devastating blow this morning as local veterinarian Tom Anderson turfed yet another animal, this...
heparin bridge

Atlanta Uses Heparin Bridge for Collapsed, Subtherapeutic Part of I-85

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ATLANTA, GA - Nearly 24 hours after a massive fire engulfed and collapsed a section of I-85 Northbound near Piedmont Road, rendering it subtherapeutic and...
divine intervention NPO after midnight miracle insurance authorization

God Makes Patient NPO After Midnight for Miracle in the Morning

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HEAVENS ABOVE - According to Gomerblog cherubs close to the All Powerful, God has informed nursing staff at Garden of Eden Medical Center to make...