Hospitalists

explosion

Clinic Nurse and Doctor Suffer Burnout, Spontaneously Combust

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MIAMI, FL - Staff at Miami Health Clinic are mourning the loss of two well-loved and respected colleagues, Nurse Michelle Boosh and Dr. George...

Interventional Radiology Performs CT-Guided Chart Biopsy

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RICHMOND, VA - History was made yesterday at Richmond Medical Center, as an interventional radiology (IR) team led by Dr. John Johnston-Johnson performed the...
Jerome Adams Surgeon General Surgeon Colonel

Surgeon General Turfs Public Health to Hospitalist General

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the complex medical comorbidity of our country's citizens, Surgeon General Jerome Adams has turfed the public health to Hospitalist General...

To Capture More Cardiology Viewers, Jake Tapper Renames Show to “The 12-Lead”

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ATLANTA, GA - In an attempt to attract a higher percentage of the much-desired cardiology demographic, producers and the host of "The Lead" Jake Tapper have...

New Medical Unit Quiet Hours Now From 3 PM to 2:59 PM

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NASHVILLE, TN - In an effort to provide much needed peace and quiet for the medical staff, Unit 4G at Nashville Memorial Hospital has...
chapped lips hot mess express

Patient Formally Diagnosed as Acute on Chronic Hot Mess

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SANTA FE, NM - After a battery of laboratory tests, radiographic imaging, and subspecialty consultations, a team of health care professionals has formally diagnosed...
bladder trial voiding

Breaking: Urinary Bladder Placed on Trial for Voiding

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ATLANTA, GA - "This voiding trial has begun!" Judge Emerson Rhodes III told a full-capacity, overly-distended courtroom in downtown Atlanta as he called order...
barium enema

Barium Enema Reveals Abnormal Presence of Barium in the Colon

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NEW YORK, NY - An inpatient medical team was shocked to learn that a barium enema performed earlier today revealed an abnormal presence of...
Death Star Darth Vader

Vader Displeased with Readmissions, Delinquent Discharge Summaries

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MED-SURG UNIT, DEATH STAR MEDICAL CENTER, DEATH STAR - We have received word from the Rebel Alliance that Darth Vader has been distracted and displeased...
sticker shock vasopressin

Reminder: Vasopressin First-Line for Treatment of Sticker Shock

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MOUNT PROSPECT, IL - With holiday shopping in full swing, the Society of Critical Care Medicine (SCCM) is reminding health care professionals that vasopressin...