Internal Medicine

cowbell

New Study Explores If More Cowbell Is The Key To Improving Sepsis Outcome

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NEW YORK, NY - An old treatment for sepsis-related fever is emerging as a potential alternative to the current sepsis bundle regimens, according to a new study by Dr. Chris Walken of Columbia University. The...
human organs

AMA Announces List of the Top 6 Useless Organs

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The Human body is a marvelous biologic machine, adapted to sustain homeostasis in a wide variety of environments. A spectacular coalescence of multiple organs highly evolved to sustain life.... for the most part. Some...

Hospitalist Spends Day After Christmas Returning Unwanted Admissions

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MORGANTON, NC - Like most people in America, Dr. Lara Nottarg got some things for Christmas that she didn’t exactly want. Unlike most Americans, Dr. Nottarg was admitting patients on call at Boesler Memorial...

Twas the Night Before Christmas Call

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'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the floor Not a creature was stirring, not even the R4; The pager that clung to my waistband was still, Providing a much-needed respite from the chronically ill; The patients...

12 Days of Christmas – Hospital Style

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On the first day of Christmas my true love bought for me, a prep with a colonoscopy. On the second day of Christmas my true love bought for me, two oxycontins and a prep with...
smoking VA patient

VA Patient Breaks Record, Quits Smoking 365 Times In One Year

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BOSTON, MA - Joe Kamel, a 69-year-old veteran, has made his way into the Guinness Book of World Records. The Vietnam War veteran had not seen a doctor for 21 years before he presented...

Studies Suggest Afternoon Rounding is More About Staff Head Count Than Patient Care

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“It’s 2 o’clock. Can we check-in with everyone now?” The Case Manager huddles with the Charge Nurse as he calls for the nurses. While studies have shown that the addition of afternoon rounding to the...
smoking at hospital

Patient with Inhuman Perseverance and Resolve Makes It Outside to Smoke with 50 Pounds...

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COLUMBUS, OH - Last week a patient at University Hospital performed a feat so incredible, so difficult, that she has earned the distinction of being the world's most stubborn smoker.  Mrs. Carol Hansel of...
thoughts and prayers

Randomized Controlled Trial Finds #ThoughtsAndPrayers Superior to #Thoughts or #Prayers Alone

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BERKELEY, CA - A recent study of millennial patients diagnosed with chronic diseases found that social media posts with #ThoughtsAndPrayers were more effective than posts with either #Thoughts or #Prayers alone. Researchers were given access...
zoll

Psalm of Zoll

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All hail the mighty Zoll, savior of the ICU The one who brings back life from the brink of death He’ll send you a jolt to find renewed vigor He’ll lead you right when your rhythm is...