Primary Care

Exercise ‘Can Be As Good As Pills’

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Exercise can be as good a medicine as pills for people with conditions such as heart disease, a study has found.  The work in the...
pinecones

Wilderness Medicine Residency Approved by ACGME, Offers to Pay Trainees in Pine Cones

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BURLINGTON, VT - Enter the profession of wilderness medicine – every closeted survivalist’s dream come true and a quaint throwback to an era where it was...

ICD-11 to Feature Only Three Codes: Sick, Well, or Dead

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ATLANTA, GA - As the nation’s hospitals and clinics panic over implementation of the ridiculously unintuitive and immensely complicated ICD-10, a stealth council of...
bad diet

Hospital Introduces ‘American Diet,’ Patient Satisfaction Soars

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LOUISVILLE, KY - Patients and medical staff are abuzz about the University of Louisville Medical Center’s (ULMC) new dietary option: the American diet.  It...
hospital administrators

Prezz-Gainey Releases Hospital Administrator Satisfaction Survey

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CASH MOUNTAIN, MA - With much excitement, Shirley Survey, MBA, M$, JD of Prezz Gainey (PG) announced the release of the much anticipated Hospital...
nystatin statin

Dammit, It’s a Ruse! Nystatin Isn’t a Statin After All

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BETHESDA, MD - The medical world is at a loss for words after scientists at the National Institute of Health (NIH) dropped the megaton...
drive thru

Urgent Care to Install Drive Thru Window

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ATLANTA, GA - An urgent care center in Atlanta, GA will be the first in the nation to provide drive-thru service as part of...
confused patient

Patient Still Concerned About Getting Sick from the Flu Shot

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MADISON, WI - Doreen Knowitall was horrified that her primary care physician again offered her a flu shot “Even though I told her I...
alternative medicine

Ask Alternative Medicine Doctors About Ebola

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Complimentary and alternative medicine roundtable: Each installment of this section, we invite our readers to send us questions that are pertinent to their health,...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...