Primary Care

camera crew for inspections

NFL Grants Seahawks’ Team Physician Access to Randomly Check Brady’s Balls

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NEW YORK, NY - NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell announced yesterday his plan to address the New England Patriots’ latest veiled attempt to bend league rules to...
medical student adorbs CAGE questionnaire infectious enthusiasm

Med Student with Crushing Debt Terrified He Will Like Family Medicine

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MAYWOOD, IL - Citing concerns about his crushing debt, local 3rd-year med student Aaron Ferguson reports that he is “terrified” he will enjoy his...
naturopathy

Brilliant Diagnosis Made by Naturopath; Cure Coming Any Day Now

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SEATTLE, WA - Local woman Barbara Hootro was finally diagnosed by acclaimed Naturopath “Dr. Bob,” accomplishing what 6 different doctors before him could not...

ChooseMyPlate.gov Updates Plate Portions for Nurses, Docs

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WASHINGTON, DC - The USDA website ChooseMyPlate.gov has updated its plate for all hospital personnel to remind them that while finding your healthy eating...
lab tests

Local Woman: ‘I Need All My Labs Drawn’

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EAST LANSING, MI – Local patient Sheryl Harris came to clinic today with a chief complaint of "I need all my labs drawn." When questioned...

Hospital Custodial Manager: ‘I Love Irritating the S**t Out of Them’

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CLEVELAND, OH - GomerBlog reporters are able to confirm that custodial staff at Memorial Hospital do indeed intentionally buff floors and clean bathrooms at...
doc mcstuffins

Study: Doc McStuffins More Evidence-Based Than Dr. Oz

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ANAHEIM, CA - Public health researchers have published the results of a new study which sought to objectively measure the quality of medical advice given...

Patient Stuck in Endless ‘Clearance’ Referral Pattern, Hasn’t Had Surgery in 6 Years

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Mr. Smith, a 67-year-old man with a fair number of medical problems, has been trying to be medically cleared for an inguinal hernia operation...
drone Santa hospitalized

Trump Proposes ‘Depo Drones’ as Means to Curb Welfare Expenditures

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NEW YORK, NY -  Presidential-hopeful Donald Trump continues to make noise as the GOP front runner, as he yesterday announced a novel, if not...
emergency physician

15 Ways to Confuse, Demoralize, and Frustrate Your Emergency Physician

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When you are a patient in a busy ED, getting your doctor’s best effort in caring for you can be difficult.  Most ED physicians...