Primary Care

Local Physician Brings Daughter to Work, Helps Tell Patients They Are Overweight

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HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Chris Zanick, a primary care physician, has been struggling to talk to his patients about being overweight.  He solved this...
smart phone medical app

New Smartphone EMR Technology Allows Up To 120 Office Visits Per Hour

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Primary care medicine got a lot faster last month when AutoDoc Technologies rolled out its newest diagnostic/EMR system, expected to allow physicians to see...
beef rib

Beef Rib Named Official State Fruit of Texas

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LOCKHART, TX - Say goodbye to the Texas red grapefruit as the official state fruit of Texas.  Texas legislators will meet later tomorrow in...
patient takes health

Breaking News: American Patient Takes Responsibility for Own Health

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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - During multidisciplinary rounds on a cardiology unit at the University of Virginia Medical Center (UVAMC), a glimmer of hope was revealed...

Medical Specialties as Harry Potter Characters

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Dolores Umbridge, Corenelius Fudge, Percy Weasley- Administration- you operate on a sliding scale of likability and we aren’t sure if you’re evil, rigid, or...
nice patient endangered species

Breaking: Nice Patients Added to Endangered Species List

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a move suggesting they are likely to become extinct unless something more is done to save them for future generations, the...
CPR

CPR Guidelines Made Even Simpler

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Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation was replaced by only chest compression in 2008 after a slow de-emphasis on replacement breathing.  This made CPR simple and easy to remember,...
mrsa spider

Devious MRSA Spider Bites Yet Another Antecubital Fossa, Remains at Large

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GASTONIA, NC - Following an all-too-familiar recent theme, a new patient was assaulted last week by a psychotic spider rampaging through the South. Earl Wayne...
baby ADHD

Enfamil with Adderall Approved for Infantile ADHD

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LEXINGTON, MA -  Spiral Pharmaceuticals has paired with baby formula giant Enfamil to create the world’s first amphetamine-fortified formula, which will treat a newly...
iatrogenic injury fun run

Local Hospital Sponsors 5K Fun Run to Raise Awareness About Iatrogenic Injury

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HAVRE DE GRACE, MD - After noticing several readmissions for falls, double-digit INRs, and recurrent nonischemic chest pain, hospitalists at Harford Memorial Hospital realized that...