October 16, 2015: National Toss Your Pager in the Trash Day
Finally. Pagers are on their way out for good!
To the delight of physicians, physician assistants, nurse practitioners, nurses, and any other health care provider who...
Man On Gluten-Free Diet Has No Idea What Gluten Actually Is
Chad Bennington, a 32-year-old otherwise healthy male without celiac disease, saw a new phrase on his favorite cereal box at his local grocery store. ...
New Blood Test Measures Serum A**hole Levels
BETHESDA, MD - Researchers at the National Institutes of Health (NIH) are giddy over a fantastic new blood test that can only be described...
FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns
WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
Hospital Pilots Pet Therapy with Black Bears, Grizzlies
VALHALLA, NY - Hospital administrators at Westchester Medical Center are piloting a new pet therapy program using service animals - black bears and grizzlies,...
Work Note Center Opens in Times Square, Deadbeats Rejoice
NEW YORK, NY – What’s all the commotion in Times Square? Not another Naked Cowboy, it’s the new Walk-In Work Note Center. Based on...
Man Cold Severity Scale (MCSS) Released!
The Man-Cold or Man-Flu can be a devastating illness for half the population. New guidelines have been released to risk-stratify these patients.
An objective rating...
Patient Surprised to Learn Zombie Doctor Not in Costume
HOLTON, KS - An area woman, recently treated in a rural Kansas emergency room on Halloween was surprised to learn that her zombie doctor...
Rabies Vaccines Result in Doggie Autism According to Andrew Wakefield, PETA Petrified
HOLY SMOKES, NC - According to GomerBlog sources at GQ, it is true. Rabies vaccines cause doggie autism. The news came following a monumental...
Inventor of Slogan ‘Pain is the 5th Vital Sign’ Now Concedes Pain is Actually...
NEW YORK, NY - Last night, in an emotional interview with Dateline NBC, Lisa Washington, who famously coined the term "Pain is the 5th Vital...