Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level
KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental...
Top 10 Reasons United is Forcibly Dragging Doctors Off Planes
THE INTERNET - United Airlines has come under fire after video surfaced of a doctor being dragged off a plane due to the airline overbooking...
Mayo Secretly Celebrates New #1 Status After Cleveland Clinic Comes Out Anti-Vax
ROCHESTER, MN - The Mayo Clinic recently held a campus-wide party this weekend full of "Number 1" balloons and cakes that said "Mayo #1". ...
Study: Red Wine in Moderation Good, in Excess Freaking Amazing
ROCHESTER, MN - Wine enthusiasts bust out the Cabernet Sauvignon, Pinot Noir, and other red varietals, and get ready to celebrate! An exciting new...
Hospitals Now Offering Seasonal Pumpkin-Spiced Patient Satisfaction Surveys
BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators at Madre De Díos Medical Center will now offer seasonal pumpkin-spiced patient satisfaction surveys in order to improve...
Styrofoam Cup Outperforms Crappy Disposable Stethoscope
ABSTRACT
Given the increased proliferation of multidrug resistant (MDR) microorganisms, it is considered standard of care to use patient-dedicated, disposable, or “crappy” stethoscopes to prevent...
Las Vegas Hospital Expands into Luxury Resort and Casino
LAS VEGAS, NV - In a bold new plan to increase hospital revenue streams, hospital administrators at Las Vegas Medical Center have teamed up with...
Vaccinations Now Definitively Linked to Pregnancy
BOSTON, MA - A new study just published in the Old England Journal of Medicine now definitively links childhood vaccinations to pregnancy. Jenny McCarthy,...
New Littmann Stethoscope Allows You to Hear One’s Thoughts
ST. PAUL, MN - Manufacturer 3M has released a new Littman Mind-Reading I Stethoscope for health care practitioners to help diagnose someone else’s thoughts,...
CDC Quarantines Jenny McCarthy
ATLANTA, GA -- Due to the severe flu outbreak this season, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has decided to examine the...