No-Show Rates Skyrocket Around Flag Day
ARLINGTON, VA - Citing elaborate Flag Day celebrations, year after year patients just don't show up at Hamilton & Burr Trauma Hospital near our nation's...
Non-Physician Hospitals, The WebMD and Wikipedia Clinic, to Open in 5 Major Cities
BOSTON, MA - In a response to rampant poor patient satisfaction scores and an overall demand of patients for more autonomy in their care,...
Inventor of Slogan ‘Pain is the 5th Vital Sign’ Now Concedes Pain is Actually...
NEW YORK, NY - Last night, in an emotional interview with Dateline NBC, Lisa Washington, who famously coined the term "Pain is the 5th Vital...
Lyrics to the Men’s Health Christmas Carol Favorite: “Check Your Balls”
It is the Season of Giving. Don’t put your d*ck in a box to spread that Christmas cheer; instead, consider performing a testicular self-exam....
Patient’s Modified Lifestyle Kills Doctor
CHICAGO, IL - Belinda Torres, a Chicago area busy professional, sent shockwaves throughout the medical community by taking her physician’s advice and modifying her lifestyle. ...
The Search for the Remains of Jimmy Hoffa Turns to ABIM’s Philadelphia Condo
PHILADELPHIA, PA - The decades-long search for Jimmy Hoffa took yet another an unexpected turn this week following revelations that the American union labor leader...
ICD-10 Already Being Updated to ICD-10.2 in 2014
WASHINGTON, DC - The much anticipated ICD-10 implementation in October 2014 will have new competition. Even before the official release of ICD-10, the International...
Patient Able to Get Dilaudid Just Before Leaving AMA
JACKSONVILLE, FL – Michael Redmond - a patient so regular to St. Joseph Hospital’s ER that if he doesn’t show up for a couple days,...
ICD-11 to Feature Only Three Codes: Sick, Well, or Dead
ATLANTA, GA - As the nation’s hospitals and clinics panic over implementation of the ridiculously unintuitive and immensely complicated ICD-10, a stealth council of...
Disney Parks Now Require Immunization Record for Admittance
ORLANDO, FL - In a bold and unprecedented response to the recent measles outbreak at Disneyland, Disney execs announced yesterday that they will institute...