Primary Care

hand washing

IDSA Releases New Recommendations: Handwashing is Bullsh*t

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ARLINGTON, VA - The world of medicine has been rocked early this morning with the release of new recommendations by the Infectious Diseases Society...
doctor patient

Patient Impressed by Doctor After Both Skim Over Same Website

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Local patient Sawyer Schmidt was reportedly quite impressed with the clinical acumen of his PCP Dr Roundhouse after an office visit to discuss CT...
red wine champagne tap Barolo tap

Study: Red Wine in Moderation Good, in Excess Freaking Amazing

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ROCHESTER, MN - Wine enthusiasts bust out the Cabernet Sauvignon, Pinot Noir, and other red varietals, and get ready to celebrate!  An exciting new...

Hospitalist Abusing Copy and Paste in Paper Charts

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CAPE COD, MA - A hospitalist at Cape Cod Medical Center, Dr. Chris Gallagher, has been under heavy scrutiny after being accused several weeks...

This Store Provides Real Allergies to Get the Medication you Want

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BEVERLY HILLS, CA — Natalie Speede-Faster really needed to get back on Adderall.  Her stupid internist was “concerned” because Natalie always wanted a higher...

Lyrica-Eluting Stent for End Stage Fibromyalgia Sufferers

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BERKELEY, CA - End stage fibromyalgia (ESF), affects 1 in 100,000 Americans nationwide.  They frequently suffer short employment expectancy, have one of the highest...
coughing

As Nurse Leans In for a Listen, Patient Can Think of No Better Time...

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BOSTON, MA - As Nurse Ned Franks leans in with a stethoscope to listen, patient Andy Charles can think of no better time today than right...
colon cleansing

Medical Science Catching Up to Fad Diets in New Exciting Breakthrough

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PORTLAND, OR - In what is being called one of the greatest breakthroughs in modern medicine, scientists at Hood River University have discovered a...

Report: Hospital CEO Was a Big Help in Clinic Today

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ST. LOUIS, MO – Outpatient care sources are reporting that Sacred Heart Hospital CEO David Larson III really helped out during clinic today. "Dave really...

True Allergy Detector, Maling-o-Vision, Now Available for Google Glass‏

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MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA - In response to an unprecedented epidemic of claimed non-narcotic pain medication allergies among patients with chronic pain conditions, Google has...