Primary Care

times square work note

Work Note Center Opens in Times Square, Deadbeats Rejoice

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NEW YORK, NY – What’s all the commotion in Times Square?  Not another Naked Cowboy, it’s the new Walk-In Work Note Center.  Based on...
iv flush

Exciting New Treatment for ‘Status Dramaticus’ Released Today by the FDA and NIH

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BETHESDA, MD - Breaking news today from the FDA and NIH researchers in Bethesda,  MD.  A new treatment for Status Dramaticus (SD) has been...
patient satisfaction

New Product “Doctor Sunshine” Helps Physicians Identify, Dismiss Dissatisfied Patients

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DURHAM, NC - A startup company based in North Carolina's Research Triangle is growing exponentially and getting rave reviews from doctors due to its...

Tips: How to Pronounce a Difficult Drug Name Without Choking, Aspirating, Dying

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Last month, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (“The” FDA) approved the efficacious and unpronounceable idarucizumab (also known, thankfully, as Praxbind) to reverse the...
alternative medicine

Homeopathic Burn Remedy Effective, Allopaths Stunned

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DENVER, CO - Doctors, skeptics, and the scientific community as a whole, were stunned today when the North American branch of the Society for...
geriatric patient survived

Geriatric Patient Miraculously Survives a 4-Day Weekend in the Hospital

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NORTH PLATTE, NE - It was a true Christmas miracle for geriatric patient, Alfred Dwindles, when he found himself alive and without significant healthcare-induced...
podiatrist tickle

Podiatrists Admit They’re Not Really Examining Patients, Just Tickling Them

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TOEJAM LAKE, CA - At the 23rd annual National Podiatric Conference on Bunions, the board of directors voted 5-4 to admit what the public...
quitting medicine

Doctor Achieves Lifelong Dream of Quitting Medicine Forever

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“Finally!” he exclaimed, throwing his white coat, scrubs, and stethoscope onto a pile of logs. “I can’t believe I made it!” Meet Hunter McCutchen.  He...
emergency department

Patient in ED Knows Nothing About Medical History, Surgeries, or Medications

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SAN JOSE, CA - When Dr. Anderson, a seasoned emergency room attending, went into room 14 late last night, he experienced a first in...
Trapped physician

Guest Delighted to Meet Physician at Party, Discusses Medical Symptoms for a Soul-Crushing 45...

11
CHARLOTTE, NC - Last week at a cocktail party, a local woman was thrilled to learn that a another guest was a practicing internist.  "I've...