Commentary: Percocet Doesn’t Work for Me Because It Has Tylenol, and Tylenol Doesn’t Help...
Thanks but no thanks. Percocet (oxycodone/acetaminophen) doesn’t work for me. Why? Isn’t it obvious? You’re the one with the medical degree and you don’t...
In an Effort to Dissuade Students from Primary Care, Medical School Administrators Push for...
PHILADELPHIA, PA - “Far too often medical students realize too late that primary care is nightmarishly broad, poorly compensated, and bloated with paperwork,” explains...
Doctors Still Unclear Why Right Said Fred So Sexy It Hurts
LONDON, ENGLAND - Despite a battery of noninvasive and invasive diagnostic tests, doctors at London Medical Center remain puzzled, as they are still unclear why...
Las Vegas Hospital Expands into Luxury Resort and Casino
LAS VEGAS, NV - In a bold new plan to increase hospital revenue streams, hospital administrators at Las Vegas Medical Center have teamed up with...
New Smartphone EMR Technology Allows Up To 120 Office Visits Per Hour
Primary care medicine got a lot faster last month when AutoDoc Technologies rolled out its newest diagnostic/EMR system, expected to allow physicians to see...
North Korea Frantically Getting Rid of Expired Missiles Prior to Upcoming Joint Commission Inspection
PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA – The president of North Korea, Kim Jong-un shocked the world when he started launching missiles at a more frenetic pace than...
Medical Device Company to Debut Sitbit
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Medical device company Pulsa Tech is unveiling the new Sitbit this week. Similar to its popular predecessor the Fitbit and Sh*tbit,...
Easter Not Recognized as Holiday, Riots Ensue at Catholic Hospital
HOSPITAL OF THE RESURRECTION - Religion is not a quiet affair at this institution. Morning and evening prayers are broadcasted over the PA system...
Justin Timberlake: I’m Bringing Measles Baaaack
Recently Justin Timberlake announced to the world that he is not planning to vaccinate his child. Evidently all the scientific evidence looks different behind...