New Patient Satisfaction Initiative Mandates That All Patient Baths Have “Happy Ending”
CARY, NC - In a bold and unprecedented move to increase patient satisfaction scores, administrators at Our Lady of Chronic Narcotic Dependence Hospital outside...
IDSA Releases New Recommendations: Handwashing is Bullsh*t
ARLINGTON, VA - The world of medicine has been rocked early this morning with the release of new recommendations by the Infectious Diseases Society...
Hospital Staff to Use Social Media to Update Patients, Direct Medical Care
PHOENIX, AZ - Hospital staff at Trinity Hospital are now required to attend social media-targeted family conference training and medical resource training.Hospital administrator Rob Hamilton...
Doctor Accused of Body Shaming for Recommending Diet and Exercise
TAMPA, FL - In a stunning display of insensitivity, Dr. Byron Myrtle is in hot water over accusations of body shaming and cyber bullying....
CPR Guidelines Made Even Simpler
Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation was replaced by only chest compression in 2008 after a slow de-emphasis on replacement breathing. This made CPR simple and easy to remember,...
Pokemon Go Video Game Gets People To Go Outside
CHICAGO, IL - Doctors are flabbergasted by what Nintendo has achieved. For years, they have been telling patients to stop playing video games and...
Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies
ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency." They are coming off of...
OB/GYN Chief Resident Finding Christmas Gift Difficult to Open, Performs Emergency Episiotomy
SANTA FE, NM - Area OB/GYN chief resident Dr. Sandra Bonit came home for the holidays after a week of night float. “Seven straight...
Health Care Providers Unsure What That Bright Yellow Glowing Orb is in the Sky
CHARLESTON, SC - In an eye-opening new study published in the latest issue of JAMA (Just Another Medical Association), researchers at The Medical University...
New Dora the Malingerer Series to Win Over Canceled Doc McStuffins Fans
ORLANDO, FL - Children and health care practitioners worldwide are still reeling after the forced resignation of Doc McStuffins. Though Disney’s spin-off Admin McBriefcase...