WASHINGTON, DC – Health and Human Services Secretary Tom Price was pleased to announce this week that 58-year-old internist Dale Mitchell has been awarded the 2017 FAFSA Memorial Perseverance Award for successfully paying off his student loans.
“Frankly, we didn’t think it was possible,” stated Price while sifting through his enormous database of student loans. “Not only did Dr. Mitchell completely pay off his loans, but he did it in only 30 years, much faster than the Pay-Til-Your-Dead repayment plan the majority of physicians are on.”
The award ceremony was held in a beautiful medical school financial aid office, decorated with public computers displaying the FAFSA website and Excel spreadsheets. In addition to a trophy, Mitchell was awarded a special “Forebearance Package” which includes a pen, a stack of Post-it notes, and $300,000 worth of low-interest student loans for his children.
The golden trophy is adorned with Mitchell’s FAFSA pin number, the interest rates of his Stafford loans over the years, and a beautiful inscription featuring highlights from his very first promissory note.
“I can’t describe how excited I am to win this prestigious award,” announced Mitchell. “My student loans have always been in my life. They were like family members… Horrible, soul-destroying family members.”