FRAMINGHAM, MA – Boasting that it will be easier than ever to estimate the 10- and 30-year cardiovascular risk of an individual, principle investigators at the National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute (NHLBI) & Boston University (BU) have released a brand-new Framingham Risk Score Abacus.

Framingham Risk Score Abacus
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“The prior Framingham Risk Score calculators depended on the accurate input of quite a bit of data – sex, age, systolic blood pressure, antihypertensive medication use, tobacco use, diabetes, total cholesterol, HDL – and many health care professionals were intimidated by that,” explained Dr. Eric Casio, one of the Framingham Heart Study principal investigators.  “These new abaci will make everyone’s lives a whole lot easier.  Online calculators will be a thing of the past.”

An abacus is a calculating tool that uses beads or stones sliding on wires, all contained within a frame.  The abacus was commonly used in China, Europe, and Russia in the centuries before the development of modern numeric systems.  Though they are not used by modern-day health care professionals, the abacus is still widely-considered to be easier to use than electronic medical records (EHR).

Casio demonstrates the Framingham Risk Score Abacus for me.

“All you have to do is slide a few beads, like this and that, and – BAM! – your 10-year risk for cardiovascular disease is 7.51%,” Casio explained.  I was in awe.  Plus the abacus kind of sounded like maracas, something you definitely cannot say about online calculators.  “This Framingham Risk Score Abacus is a simple thing of beauty.  I even do my own taxes on this.  Goodbye, smartphone.  Hello, abacus!”

NHLBI and BU investigators believe that if the Framingham Risk Score Abaci are well-received, we might soon see a future health care system completely devoid of EHRs and replaced instead by more user-friendly electronic health abaci.

The future can’t come soon enough.

Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.