Is this your first time using an incentive spirometer (or marijuana)? Well, you’re in luck: our Gomerblog team has created this easy 15-step process to using your incentive spirometer (or weed). Don’t be intimidated, it’s really easy (awesome) so let’s get started (stoned)!
STEP 01: Sit upright (or not).
STEP 02: Hold the incentive spirometer (joint) in an upright position.
STEP 03: Thank your nurse (weedman) for the incentive spirometer (weed).
STEP 04: Queue Dark Side of the Moon by Pink Floyd (or Physical Graffiti by Led Zeppelin).
STEP 05: Seal your lips tightly around the mouthpiece (joint or bong).
STEP 07: Watch the piston (strobe light) rise up (turn on and off).
STEP 08: Hold your breath as long as possible.
STEP 09: Exhale slowly.
STEP 10: Rest for a few seconds before repeating 10 times an hour.
STEP 11: After every 10 breaths, cough. This will happen whether you like it or not.
STEP 12: Address the munchies.
STEP 13: Stop acting paranoid, it’ll be fine.
STEP 14: Seriously, calm down, no one is after you.
STEP 15: That’s just your nurse, she’s not a cop, okay?! CALM DOWN!!