Medical Student in Library Mistaken for Homeless Man
WORCESTER, MA – Local medical student Jeremy Wynn was escorted out of his medical school library this Saturday by police with the official police reports...
All Caught Up with Game of Thrones, Local Man Finally Decides He Should Get...
ROANOKE, VA - Upon finishing Game of Thrones Season 3 at 2 AM, local man Charles Cerioli decided it would be a good time to visit...
Radiology Reading Center Switching to Snapchat
VALHALLA, NY - The Valhalla Nighthawk Radiology Group recently announced its new partnership with Snapchat, the popular photo messaging application, to place itself ahead...
ER Places Bowl Full of Percocet in Waiting Room, Lowers Visits
HANOVER, NJ – Local emergency medicine physicians have developed a groundbreaking way to reduce the number of patients they will see during a shift. The...
ICU Transfer Arrives with Hospital Summary on a Napkin
SALT LAKE CITY, UT - An 83-year-old man was transferred to the University Hospital Critical Care Unit from an outside hospital on Tuesday, with a...
ER Hires ‘Dilaudid Nazi’ to Dispense (or Not) Dispense Opioids
ATLANTA, GA - The famous "Soup Nazi" from Seinfeld has been hired by Memorial Hospital’s ER to dispense or not dispense opioids to patients checking...
Man ‘Accidentally Falls’ on Gerbil That Ran Through Lube
MEMPHIS, TN – A local resident presented to the emergency room with an unusual complaint this evening. Chief complaint: "My bottom really hurts."
At first he was...
After 9 Head Trauma Calls, The Doctor is ‘Furious’
BATTLE CREEK, MI – Family doctor, William Turncoat, was visibly upset after slamming the phone down. "That’s the ninth time today I’ve told her… I tell...
Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease
NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases." Unfortunately,...