Emergency Medicine

Spock Star Trek

Spock: “Patient’s Demands for Dilaudid Highly Illogical”

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STARFLEET - Mr. Spock of the USS Enterprise has informed Gomerblog that he finds his patient's demands for Dilaudid and other narcotics "highly illogical." He confided...

Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’

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CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine...
emergency room

Emergency Department Staff Shocked by Prior Authorization Request

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CHADRON, NE - Emergency room physician assistant Chester Preshuns was shocked last Thursday afternoon during transport of his STEMI patient to a cardiac/cath lab...

ER Visits Down 72% When it Rains, Trial to Focus on Healing Power of...

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NEW ORLEANS, LA – A multicenter observational study last year reviewed millions of ER visits and found that ER visits are down 72% when it rains....
grandma reindeer

Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer, Remains in Critical Condition

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OUTSIDE IN THE SNOW SOMEWHERE - GomerBlog is sad to report that Grandma was “found down” 3 days before Christmas during potential Santa Claus test...
dyspnea

FDA Approves FUROSESONEROLAQUINOX for Undifferentiated Dyspnea

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - To the delight of emergency physicians across the country, the Food and Drug Administration has approved the use of a new drug...
nice patient endangered species

Emergency Department Only Taking Care of Very Pleasant Patients

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HOGSMEADE, CT - The emergency department of South Shore Hospital in Hogsmeade will only be treating "very pleasant" patients starting November 1, 2018.  Argus...
dilaudid graph

Study: Dilaudid Administration Directly Correlates with High Patient Satisfaction; Narcan Not So Much

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BOSTON, MA - As many doctors and nurses have discovered the hard way, a recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine...
atls by medical specialty

Do You Know Your ABCs by Subspecialty?

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CHICAGO, IL – The American College of Surgeons (ACS) released new subspecialty-focused primary survey guidelines for Advanced Trauma Life Support (ATLS) this week after...
hospital patient

21 Tips for Patients on How to Be Good Patients: From Health Care Professionals

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Ok, it is time to be brutally honest to our patients.  As health care professionals, we want to take amazing care of them.  We...