Ask a Drug Seeker
Dear Drug Seeker,
I’m really concerned about the Zika virus and the Summer Olympics going on as scheduled. Do you think this is a good...
New Narcan Reversal Agent, NarCANT, Hits the Market
CHICAGO, IL - After years of having their days ruined by jackwad paramedics and God-complexed ER nurses, opioid addicts everywhere rejoiced today at the...
Hotelier Recommendations for Emergency Department “Improvement”
Due to increasing pressure on administrative staff to correct for their hospital’s Press Gainey deficit, administrator Eagerpants McGee of New York City Hospital unveiled...
Worst Pick-Up Lines by Medical Subspecialty
GomerBlog did some research on a hot and steamy topic: What are the worst pick-up lines by subspecialty? Here goes!
Allergy
“I like it when you...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the...
Hospital Enacts New BYOD Policy: Bring Your Own Dilaudid
NEW YORK, NY - With patients treating hospitals like an a la carte restaurant or 5-star luxury hotel, hospital leaders at New York Medical...
Veterans Affairs Honors Veterans with New Mega Motrin Pills
WASHINGTON, DC - Motrin has long been the cornerstone of treatment for any medical ailment of Active Duty Service Members and Veterans for decades. ...
Patient’s Pregnancy Test Positive Despite Denying Sexual Activity; Obstetricians Baffled
A 15-lead ECG, two X-rays, an ultrasound, a full-body CT, an MRI with gadolinium, and still, a mystery.
“It’s perplexing, that’s for sure,” said Dr. Jouseph...
Mood Rings Reflect Real Time Patient Satisfaction
COLUMBIA, SC - Due to lagging patient satisfaction scores and frequent complaints, County Hospital administrators are fitting every patient with a mood ring so staff...
So You Develop Chest Pain on a Gondola, What to Do Next
How much do you hate this scenario? You're taking a lovely ride on your gondola when it happens: substernal 10 out of 10 chest...