Emergency Medicine

nice patient endangered species

Emergency Department Only Taking Care of Very Pleasant Patients

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HOGSMEADE, CT - The emergency department of South Shore Hospital in Hogsmeade will only be treating "very pleasant" patients starting November 1, 2018.  Argus...
hoverboard injuries

After-Christmas Special: Buy a Hoverboard, Get a Free Visit to the ED

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Emergency departments all across the globe are swamped in what can only be deemed as the best deal in holiday history.  Thousands of men,...

Narc Madness

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It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4!  This year...
C-collar cervical collar neck brace

Med Student Struggling to Fit C-Collar onto Woman’s Cervix

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BALTIMORE, MD - A first-year medical student at The Hoppin’ Johns University is struggling to place a woman's cervix into a C-collar this morning. "You...
confused doctor

Patient’s Pregnancy Test Positive Despite Denying Sexual Activity; Obstetricians Baffled

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A 15-lead ECG, two X-rays, an ultrasound, a full-body CT, an MRI with gadolinium, and still, a mystery. “It’s perplexing, that’s for sure,” said Dr. Jouseph...
trauma knife

Trauma Patient with Isolated Stab Wound to Shoulder Can’t Understand Why His $300 Pants...

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WASHINGTON, DC - A trauma patient at Washington Hospital Center became visibly upset in the trauma bay after his $300 pants were cut off with trauma...
doc hunt

Video Game Review: Doc(ument) Hunt

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Pros / Doc(ument) Hunt is a fun follow-up to Nintendo's Duck Hunt that allows medical providers to channel their rage against paperwork by shooting up flying...

Mob Boss Agrees to Shoot Man in Kneecaps Before Weekend

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CHICAGO, IL - "I swore off horse races for 10 years, but I relapsed," Sam Hemsworth told us from his wheelchair.  "Before I knew...
physician score

Check Your TriBureau PhyCU Physician Reimbursement Score Today!

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We all know that Physician Compliance Union (PhyCU) Reimbursement Scores are critical to maintain.  But do you know how they are determined and what...

SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover

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DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...