Emergency Medicine

73 miles per hour

Beverly Hills Hospital Unveils New ‘Vapid Response Team’

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BEVERLY HILLS, CA - It’s no secret that Americans spend far too much on end-of-life care. Moreover, medical interventions on the terminally ill can...
routine ECG

Local EKG Tech Reassigned Due to Voluptuous Breasts

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MIAMI, FL – EKG tech Candi Jacobs has been working at Mercy Hospital for two years.  She was recently reassigned; hospital administration stated the...

Family Guy Teaches Us About the Wonders of Ipecac

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Ipecac was once a remedy in the event of accidental poisonings.  In this classic episode of Family Guy, Peter, Stewie, Chris & Brian show us why...

Hypodilaudemia Epidemic Reaches Painful Proportions

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Department of Health and Human Services reports this morning that there has been a recent spike nationwide in...
EM Doctor

Internal Medicine Resident Ecstatic About Upcoming Emergency Department Rotation

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STONY BROOK, NY – Internal medicine (IM) resident Dr. Thinksalot was delighted to learn that his emergency department rotation was coming up.  "When I...
patient in pain

Patient with 9 Listed Allergies and ‘High Pain Tolerance’ Actually Has a High Pain...

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TOPEKA, KS – Local ER Physician Dr. Onlee Cönsults claims he met the Great White Buffalo of ER patients during his shift last evening...
celebration

100th ER Patient Leaves AMA, Celebratory Luncheon to Be Held

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MOUNT CARMEL, NY - Congratulations to the staff of Mount Carmel ER!!  Please join us for a celebratory luncheon today at 1pm in the...
laughter best medicine Ativan

Breaking: Ativan is the Best Medicine, Laughter Falls to Sixth

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BOSTON, MA - Is laughter the best medicine?  Not any more.  According to a new poll of physicians and other medical providers published in the New England...
lawn mower

Local Man Loses Arm in Lawnmower Accident, ‘Why Can’t My Arm Be Made of...

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WITCHITA, KS – Kevin O’Neil had an unfortunate accident yesterday where he lost his right arm.  “I was reaching into the mower to clear...