Emergency Medicine

Doctor Wins Lottery: Patient List Free of Jerks, A**holes

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NEW YORK, NY - Internal medicine physician Damien Sharp won the medical equivalent of a lottery jackpot today: his patient list is completely devoid...

RN, MD Confused After Patient Requests Pain Med That Begins with an E

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ATLANTA, GA - An inpatient health care team has been baffled all day by a patient’s persistent requests for pain medication, but it’s not...
hug, hugging

Struggling Intern Asking for ‘Just One Hug’

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BOSTON, MA - "Just one hug" is all intern Philip Geary is asking, if not BEGGING, from his fellow interns, residents, students, nurses, attendings,...

Genuine ‘Slipped and Fell’ Rectal Foreign Body Victim Stuns Experts

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RICHMOND, VA - In what is thought to be a world's first, witnesses have confirmed that a young Virginian man genuinely slipped and fell...
Mr. Peanut

Breaking: Mr. Peanut Allergic to Himself

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PITTSBURGH, PA - Unfortunate news today as the Kraft Heinz Company announced that one of its most beloved mascots, Planters' Mr. Peanut, has been...

Bronco Products Announces the New and Revolutionary Perco-Later

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RESEARCH TRIANGLE, NC - Bronco Products, Inc. announces the recent FDA UL approved and patented Perco-later Percocet recovery device.  The Perco-later is a revolutionary new...
Bell Biv Devoe

Toxicologist Bell Biv DeVoe Confirms: ‘That Girl is Poison’

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BOSTON, MA - After "sensing something strange in my mind" for a few days now, Boston emergency physician and toxiciologist Dr. Bell Biv DeVoe has...
diabetic coma

Cookie Monster in Critical Condition Due to Diabetic Complications

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SESAME STREET - Children around the world awoke from sleepy-time to the stunning news that Cookie Monster is battling for his life in the intensive...

Psychic Hired to Read Patients’ Minds, Doctor Visit Time Reduced

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BATON ROUGE, LA -- Do you think doctors ask weird questions—like “Do you have any problems with your kidneys?” Or ones that are hard...
heparin bridge 85

I-85 in Atlanta is Finally Therapeutic, Heparin Bridge D/C’d

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ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog is excited to report that I-85 in Atlanta, which collapsed 6 weeks ago for reasons that can likely be blamed...