What, No Dilaudid?! Guests Leave Super Bowl Party AMA
ATLANTA, GA - Stating that the party spread of salads, sandwiches, guacamole, cheese and pepperoni pizza, wings, burgers, hot dogs, and fried chicken simply...
Triage Nurse Rolls Dice to Determine Patient Priority Level
Mercy Regional Hospital ER's newest RN Heidi Evans has been having a rough start to her career at the triage desk, where her job...
Pseudoseizure: Please Practice Before Coming to the ED
MILWAUKEE, WI - Emergency department staff at Elm Grove Methodist Medical Center thoroughly enjoyed the complete nonsensical seizure performance by a local homemaker.
Carol Whitaker, 43, of...
New Voice Recognition Software ‘Dragroan’ to Dictate Physicians’ Exasperated Groans & Sighs
SILICON VALLEY, CA – Speech recognition software company Dragon, used by doctors and other professionals worldwide for transcription, announced the launch of a new...
Area Emergency Physician Successfully Manages Gout Without Consultation
SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Confetti is raining down from the ceilings as emergency medicine physician Deion Gnosis is being congratulated for diagnosing and...
Med Student Avoids Pelvic Exam for Record 1,429th Straight Day
KANSAS CITY, MO - Fourth-year medical student Rick Hansen ain't no dummy. He even says it himself: "I ain't no dummy." Like most medical...
New KwikChek ED Expected to be a Hit
BALTIMORE, MD - A revolutionary new emergency department will be tested soon in the Second Memorial Semi-Regional Healthcare Center and Annexes. "We took functional...
Breaking: VA Pick Ronny Jackson Withdraws from Both Nomination, Opioids
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the "baseless and anonymous attacks on my character" as well as intractable abdominal cramps, lacrimation, and rhinorrhea, White House physician Rear...
ER Refuses to End Hospital Shutdown Until IM Agrees to Admit All Drunks
NEW ORLEANS, LA – Tulane Medical Center has shut down the hospital after negotiations between the Emergency Room (ER) and Internal Medicine (IM) failed...