Glass Candy Bowl Filled with Assortment of Antibiotics, Steroids, and Narcotics Available at ER...
HANOVER, NJ - Many might remember the ER that became famous in 2014 for placing a free bowl full of percocets in their waiting...
Dear BaconSpeak Voice Recognition Software Company
I am an emergent see room dock door. I am righting to let you no how much eye am in joying your voice recognition...
Ashley Madison Data Leak Possibly Linked to Spike in Hospital Admissions
LOS ANGELES, CA - News of the Ashley Madison adultery website data leak is possibly leading to an unexpected surge in hospital resource utilization today,...
Health Care Providers Hail the Launch of the New “Patient Complaint Line”
Following in the pattern of patient satisfaction scores, Dreamland General Hospital has initiated a new "Patient Complaint Line." When a patient has acted in...
ACEP Renames Black Friday ‘Black & Blue Friday’
IRVING, TX - Recognizing Black Friday not as the first day of the holiday shopping season but as a day to "kill each other...
20 Out of 10 Medical Providers Annoyed by Patients’ Misuse of Pain Scales
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study by the Centers for Pain Control & Other Nonsense (CPCON), a whopping 20 out of 10...
Las Vegas Hospital Expands into Luxury Resort and Casino
LAS VEGAS, NV - In a bold new plan to increase hospital revenue streams, hospital administrators at Las Vegas Medical Center have teamed up with...
ER Installs ‘Reverse Matt Lauer’ Switches to Lock Drugseekers Out
NEW YORK, NY – Inspired by the Today Show’s Matt Lauer’s desk switch that locked his door entrapping his victims, Emergency Room’s across the...
Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...
Headlines from the Week in Medical News
ROCHESTER, NY - After two-year grant-writing process, associate professor of medicine’s submission to JAMA’s “funny cartoon caption contest” fails peer review process.
AKRON, OH -...