Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
Medical Specialties as Harry Potter Characters
Dolores Umbridge, Corenelius Fudge, Percy Weasley- Administration- you operate on a sliding scale of likability and we aren’t sure if you’re evil, rigid, or...
By Popular Overdose Demand: Activated Charcoal Smoothie at Your Local ER
HARTFORD, CT - Get those Press-Ganey scores up with the new Activated Charcoal Smoothie! With the number of intentional and unintentional overdoses skyrocketing across...
Forgot-to-Pee Syndrome Afflicting Millions of Health Care Workers
WASHINGTON, DC - The Journal of the American National Society, Committee, and Association of Urinary Retention and Other Things Too (JANSCAUROTT) estimates that nearly...
New CMS Guideline: Door-to-Dilaudid Time
WOODLAWN, MD - Today the Center for Medical Surveys (CMS) announced a radical change to benchmarking and patient satisfaction surveys. Realizing the opportunity to...
Man in US Furious About Waiting 15 minutes in ER; Meanwhile Patient in South...
DENVER, CO – 46-year-old Marcus Stillbee is furious after waiting for 15 minutes to be seen at the local Quicky Care Medical Center ER...
Medicare to Use Physician and Nurse Surveys to Rate Patients for Compensation
WASHINGTON, DC - Medicare announced groundbreaking plans to use physician and nurse surveys to rate their patients by 2017 as a measure to set “individualized”...
A Practical Guide to Intravenous Line Insertion for Interns by a Cynical Resident Post...
1. Decide if you really need the line. You can use this simple test. Approach your senior doctor and say, “The patient has really...
So You’ve Been Hit by a Stray Dart, What to Do Next
It happens all the time. You're hanging out at a bar or friend's house playing a game of darts, when - BAM!! - a...