Friday, April 19, 2024

Emergency Medicine

Dilaumed: Look-Alike Sound-Alike Medication Praised by ER Physicians and Nurses Everywhere

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – A new medication that has been deliberately named to be a classic look-alike sound-alike drug, has been welcomed with arms wide open among emergency medicine physicians and nurses. "We typically have to...
icu vs ER

ICU Team Happy to Have ER Resident Rotating in ICU

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HOUSTON, TX - The ICU team at Sarcasm General expressed unlimited joy when they learned that the hotshot ER residents would start rotating with them this month. "We are so glad to have these pretentious...

Local Hospital Has New Policy: Ask for Dilaudid, Get Dilaudid, No Questions Asked

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COLUMBUS, OH - A local hospital is trying a new, controversial but more efficient approach to medical care.  “We have changed our guidelines, if you want Dilaudid you get Dilaudid, if you want Valium, you...

Updated 2015 ACLS Algorithm

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ACLS KEY BELOW: * Medical Team Confused as Patient Made DNR Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays ** Joint Commission Mandates Extensive Timeout Prior to Initiating CPR *** Product Review: Mattel’s Resuscitate Me Elmo **** New CPR Guidelines Recommend Switching Out...
end of life care

ZDoggMD: “Ain’t the Way to Die”

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End of life care.  We need to talk about it more... From ZDoggMD: "Need help breaking the ice?  Here’s Ain’t The Way To Die, based on the Eminem and Rihanna masterpiece Love The Way You Lie.  It’s the...
hospital

Hospital Publishes 6 Patient Guidelines: ‘Please Try Not to Confuse Us with a Hotel’

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Here at Outside Hospital (OSH), we are 100% committed to your satisfaction as a patient.  To this end, we have created this pamphlet, which contains some tips and advice to guide you in your...
hospital patient

21 Tips for Patients on How to Be Good Patients: From Health Care Professionals

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Ok, it is time to be brutally honest to our patients.  As health care professionals, we want to take amazing care of them.  We want them to heal.  We want them to feel better....

Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease

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NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases."  Unfortunately, our nation's emergency department doctors and nurses are plagued with...

These Two Dudes Caught, Reign of Terror Over

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ST. LOUIS, MO – America’s most popular unsolved mystery, the mystery case of two individuals who team up to shoot, beat, and steal from many innocent Americans, has been solved.  These two criminals only known...
EM doctor vs Hospitalist

ZDoggMD: “The Confrontation” (Les Misérables Parody)

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Here is one of our favorite ZDoggMD videos from the past.  A hospitalist and an emergency medicine physician go at it in a Les Misérables-style fight.  The conclusion they come to is priceless! If you...