Anesthesiology

Sleeping Beauty

Sleeping Beauty Wakes Up After Single Dose of Narcan

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MEDIEVAL ENGLAND - In a last ditch effort to prevent intubation for airway protection, Sleeping Beauty - also known as Princess Aurora, the daughter of...

ASA Admits NPO Guidelines are Entirely Arbitrary

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San Diego, CA- In a move that shocked surgeons and anesthesiologists alike, the American Society of Anesthesia announced today that their NPO guidelines are...

Anesthesia Techs Strike; Anesthesiologists Forced to Go Get Their Own Quarters

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HUNTSVILLE, AL - In the midst of a contentious labor dispute, anesthesia techs at Huntsville General Hospital have gone on strike. Amongst the many...
epidural middle economy Trendelenburg

Passenger Wants Epidural Before Squeezing Into Middle Economy Seat

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Realizing that there was no other way around what would otherwise be four hours of misery, lanky and long-limbed 6'...

Anesthesiologist and Surgeon Can’t Agree on Patient’s Care by Midnight Deadline, Hospital Shutdown Ensues

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ROANOKE, VA – Dr. Foster was experiencing some bleeding during his right hemicolectomy.  He asked, “What is the patient’s blood pressure?”  Dr. Heathstrom looked up from...

Surgery is Delayed Due to Lack of “Time In” After Time Out

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SAN JOSE, CA - OR 12 experienced a three-hour delay for what was supposed to be a 7 am start on a Tuesday morning...
nephrology

Always Blame Nephrology

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Intern: Patient’s BP is now 90/50. Resident: This is from pulling too much fluid with dialysis Intern: Patient didn’t get any dialysis today Resident: Then, it is...
anesthesia patient

Mayim Bialik causes The American Society of Anesthesiologists to Quit and Rebrand

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Mayim Bialik may be the straw that broke the camel’s back once and for all for Anesthesiologists throughout the world. On Friday night’s Jeopardy...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Breaking: CMS Creates New Blame Anesthesia ICD-10 Codes

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) & National Center of Health Statistics (HCHS) have created a new set of...
intubation teeth

Med Student Knocks Out 30 Teeth Attempting to Intubate Patient, Intern Gets the 7-10...

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TUSKEGEE, AL – In an unprecedented display of disregard for dentition, MS4 Gunner McDeebag managed to knock out all but two of a patient’s...