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Hipster Pulmonologist replaces Pulmonary Toilet with Pulmonary Bidet

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Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania— A local Pulm-Crit PGY4 said he will “never go back to traditional pulmonary toileting” after trying pulmonary bidet. As he excitedly and repeatedly...
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Fellowship in Nursing Leadership

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University Medical Center is announcing a new Emergency Medicine fellowship in Nursing Leadership. The primary goal for the fellowship will be to develop future...

Hospital for Special Surgery Admits to not Being “That Special”

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New York, NY- In an official announcement of something that has been known in ortho circles for quite some time, the Hospital for Special...
Seven Blunders

New battery-free pager powered by residents’ sweat and tears.

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In a seemingly limitless display of fiscal ingenuity, hospital administrators have invented a battery-free pager. Administrators have long lamented the hundreds of dollars wasted...

ASA Admits NPO Guidelines are Entirely Arbitrary

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San Diego, CA- In a move that shocked surgeons and anesthesiologists alike, the American Society of Anesthesia announced today that their NPO guidelines are...
doctor lunch

Resident Appreciation Lunch Just Leftover Cafeteria Food

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Tampa, FL - Calling the event "Historic", and "The first of its kind", Hospital CEO Dale Gerald posed for cameras as he scooped hot...

Medtronic, Blueface Promote New Thrombolysis System Clotiana

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DUBLIN, IRELAND: In a recent press release, Medtronic has announced its promotional partnership with Los Angeles-based rapper, Blueface, to market its new thrombolysis system...
hypertension guidelines

Watching Cable News Raises Blood Pressure Better than Levophed, Study Finds

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It is common knowledge that watching your Grandpa getting riled up night after night watching cable news opinion hosts rant and rave about their...

Anesthesia Makes Surgical Recommendations

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In a world flip-turned upside down, anesthesia has had enough and is making recommendations on how to do surgery. During a hernia surgery: “Oh, you’re...

New ICD 10 Codes Prove Extremely Useful

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New ICD 10 code series for when you have no f***g clue what’s going on with your patient, but you still want to get...