Hospital Administration

bellies

Doctors Mandated to Rub Patients’ Bellies to Improve Patient Satisfaction Scores

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PENSACOLA, FL - In an effort to bolster patient satisfaction scores, doctors at Sacred Heart Health System have been mandated to rub patients' bellies, say...

Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies

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ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency."  They are coming off of...
doctors and administrators clapping

Breaking: Administrators Still Clapping Over Stupid Sh*t

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DALLAS, TX - In an effort to learn more about the parasites collectively known as hospital administrators, undercover Gomerblog reporters have found that today,...

Patient Who Won’t Sign Consent Form Feared to Have Read It

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The decision by a patient to not sign an informed consent form has left her surgeon petrified that she actually read the form. If...
hospital administrators

Jealous of Nurses Week, Hospital Administrators Plan to Create Administrators Week

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ATLANTA, GA - Jealous of all the attention registered nurses (RNs) have received during Nurses Week, hospital administrators nationwide are hoping to create an...
winter outdoor unit

Hospital Opens New Outdoor Wintertime Med-Surg Unit

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - This winter season has been historically busy with influenza A wreaking havoc on health care systems, which are filled to the...
hospital administrator golfing

A Modern Hippocratic Oath for Hospital Administrators

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Going forward, I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this cost-saving and value-added covenant: I am an agent of change...
hospital

Hospital Now Accepting Likes, Retweets as Payments

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NASHVILLE, TN - In a stunning health care coup, Stalwart Memorial Hospital has announced a new advertising campaign that is sure to change the...
hospital administrators

Administrator Says Ideal Hospital Would Have 10,000 Beds, 10,000 Administrators, and Maybe a Few...

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NEW YORK, NY - In an interview with the New England Journal of Administration (NEJA), hospital administrator Jason Wilcox stated his vision for the...
computer mouse

Cost-Cutting Savvy: IT Replacing Computer Mice with Real Mice

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Health care systems are always implementing innovative new ways to defray costs, and it turns out Los Angeles Medical Center...