Friday, July 3, 2020

Endocrinology

ACTH stim test serum cortisol

New ACTH Stim Test Measures Serum Cortisol Every Minute

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Today new guidelines released by the Endocrine Society (ES) encourage modification of the standard high-dose ACTH stimulation test with measurement of serum cortisol levels q1minute for the entire 60-minute...
Mario mushroom 27 bones

Endocrinologist: Small Mario Suffering from Mushroom Deficiency

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WORLD 1-1 - Problem solved: After a battery of tests (including colonoscopy), an endocrinologist at World 1-1 Medical Center has discovered and informed Small Mario that his small stature is the result of severe mushroom...
honest patient

Thyroid Diagnosis Remains Elusive Despite Long List of Nonspecific Symptoms

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CINCINNATI, OH - Ohio resident Tracy Murphy is preparing to seek a third medical opinion about her thyroid condition that remains undiagnosed. “It all started about a year ago” reports Mrs. Murphy. “I told my...
gummy bears

Gummy Metformin Hits Shelves

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PITTSBURGH, PA - A gummy candy form of the popular diabetes medication metformin hit the shelves last month and the entire medical community is in awe.  It is already being called the most important...
lantus crocs

Crocs Now Adding Insulin to Footwear Line

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NIWOT, CO - In a news conference last week, Andrew Rees, CEO of Crocs, Inc., announced that all new Crocs will now include microneedles that slowly excrete insulin when worn. "We've held the corner on...

Doctor to Hand Out Metformin for Halloween

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HOUSTON, TX – Local physician Dr. Sharma plans to hand out “Fun-Size” packages of metformin this Halloween. “Pretty much every child develops diabetes on November 1st after a successful trick-or-treating.  I’ll being doing their hearts...

New Journal of Negative Studies Announced

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BOSTON, MA - The medical community is abuzz today with the announcement of the new Journal of Negative Studies.  The journal, which will focus on studies that showed no effect on patient outcomes, will...

10 Photos From the 2017 American Diabetes Association Conference They Don’t Want You to...

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The American Diabetes Association (ADA) was relentlessly mocked on Twitter over the weekend for asking conference attendees to remove any tweets that contain photography of the conference. This was viewed as a threat to open...

Most Popular Medical Questions of 2016 by State

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2016 is complete, and we combed through the data at Google to find out what were the most popular medical questions asked by state (click the map to enlarge): What is New England's obsession with...
wine for surgical prep

VIP Treatment Offers Merlot, Pinot Noir as Surgical Prep

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MILL VALLEY, CA - As hospitals across the country merge into corporate conglomerates, they lose their identity, much like identical Walmarts taking out Mom and Pop shops, leaving poor residents without the ability to...
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