Internal Medicine

aorta

Laboratory Technician Decides to Delay ‘Stat’ Blood Test Result Due to Excessive Pestering

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INDIANA – Today a laboratory technician at Holy Cross Hospital decided enough was enough and took matters into his own hands.  At 5:42 a.m....
yiddish medical

Yiddish to Be Introduced Into Official Medical Terminology

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Language Council of Hospitals and Institutions of Medicine (LCHAIM) announced yesterday that a number of commonly used Yiddish terms have...
hospital employees

Hospital Issues Memorandum Regarding the Revised Policy for Procedure Revisions

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To All Hospital Employees: This memorandum is being issued as notification regarding the revised Policy for Procedure Revisions. The Policy for Procedure Revisions outlines the...
the purge

The Joint Commission Announces First Annual ‘Patient Safety Purge’

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In a move sparked by the popularity of the horror movie franchise, The Purge, the Joint Commission for the Accreditation of Hospital Organizations (JCAHO)...
angry patient

Poor Colonoscopy Bowel Prep Blamed on Doctor

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BOUTTE, LA - Bobby Boudreaux's colonoscopy had to be aborted this morning due to a poor bowel prep, making it impossible to safely perform...

Cat on Ventilator, Still Full Code After 4 Years

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FREDERICKSBURG, FL - Local cat, Smokey, has been staying in the local vet hospital - in the ICU - for about 4 years.  This...
hypoxemic Blue Journal pink

Hypoxemic Blue Journal Oxygenated Back to a Healthy Pink

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NEW YORK, NY - The chronically-hypoxemic Blue Journal, also known as the American Journal of Respiratory and Critical Care Medicine, has finally been adequately...
medical doctor

Doctor Absolutely Crushes the Lung Exam This Morning

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AUSTIN, TX - The patient's lungs never stood a chance.  After some idle chit-chat about symptoms of dyspnea and wheeze, hospitalist Miguel Ruiz proceeded...
medical student menu

Med Student Given Important Task: Find Out What’s on Today’s Menu

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NASHVILLE, TN - Instructed by her team that the task she was being given was of the utmost importance, third-year Vanderbilt University medical student...
breathing

In Effort to Contain Coronavirus, CDC Urges Americans to Abstain from Breathing for 2...

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ATLANTA, GA—Citing the effectiveness of sex abstinence in preventing sexually-transmitted infections like HIV, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has strongly advised...