Internal Medicine

Interventional Radiology Performs CT-Guided Chart Biopsy

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RICHMOND, VA - History was made yesterday at Richmond Medical Center, as an interventional radiology (IR) team led by Dr. John Johnston-Johnson performed the...

Intergalactic Health Council Recommends Galaxies Stay at Least 6 Million Light-Years Apart

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THE GALAXY OF ANDROMEDA - The nearby galaxy of Andromeda has been watching with bated breath as novel coronavirus rapidly spreads around planet Earth....
ativan diffuser

The Makers of the Ativan Diffuser Announce Ground Breaking New Product

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Capitalizing on their previous success throughout the healthcare world by the H-Vape 86, the makers of the Ativan Diffuser have begun selling their new...

Pharmacist Struggling to Calculate Dinner Tip

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OCEANSIDE, NY - Inpatient pharmacist Mark Donato, beloved and trusted by his fellow physicians and other medical providers for being able to “dose anything,”...
iatrogenic injury fun run

Local Hospital Sponsors 5K Fun Run to Raise Awareness About Iatrogenic Injury

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HAVRE DE GRACE, MD - After noticing several readmissions for falls, double-digit INRs, and recurrent nonischemic chest pain, hospitalists at Harford Memorial Hospital realized that...

Master Radiologist Able to Hedge on Every Possible Medical Condition

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BOSTON, MA – According to the abdominal CT scan report internist Dr. Sam Erikson just pulled up, master radiologist Dr. Bart Waddell has once again...

ID Clinic Handing Out Free Chastity Belts

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INDIANAPOLIS, IN - An infectious diseases clinic is thinking outside the box in an effort to promote safe sex practices by passing out free...

Nation’s Arteries Brace for Impact of Chipotle’s New Queso

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SACRAMENTO, CA – Speaking at a press conference last Saturday, a local left renal artery expressed “grave concern” amongst itself and the billions of...

Cinnabon Creates New Insulin Rolls: Insulinabons

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SEATTLE, WA - American purveyor of cinnamon rolls and diabetes, Cinnabon has announced a new tactic to combat the obesity epidemic, not by changing...

Woman Fakes Heart Attack to Make Flight Land at Her Real Destination

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GUNNISON, CO - A woman who couldn’t find a direct flight from Los Angeles to Gunnison, Colorado bought a ticket to Kansas City, Missouri instead....