New Code Potassium Repletion Team to Revolutionize Inpatient Care
NASHVILLE, TN - Health care professionals will tell you if there is one epidemic that deserves greater attention than the opioid and obesity epidemics...
Thyroid Diagnosis Remains Elusive Despite Long List of Nonspecific Symptoms
CINCINNATI, OH - Ohio resident Tracy Murphy is preparing to seek a third medical opinion about her thyroid condition that remains undiagnosed.
“It all started...
The 12 Symptoms of the Medical Zodiac
Do you remember your constellations, in particular the 12 symptoms of the medical zodiac? Bust out your telescopes, find your closest clear night sky,...
FDA Approves Groundbreaking Postmortem Chemotherapy Protocol
BOCA RATON, FL - Sending shockwaves throughout the medical community, the Food & Drug Administration approved a postmortem chemotherapy regimen to be administered after...
Breaking: Nurse Initiates Lesser-Known Chloride Repletion Protocol
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Nurse Jess Casamento of Ochsner Medical Center is one of the best when it comes to repleting electrolytes: potassium, magnesium, even...
“Hands Across the Globe” Fundraiser Aims to Stop Spread of Coronavirus
WUHAN, CHINA—The 1980s’ supergroup USA for Africa, known mostly for its hunger-awareness-raising “We Are the World” tune and “Hands Across America” event, announced yesterday...
Cancer Drug Delayed 2 Years Due to Licensing Deal
Boston, MA – Astra-Nomical has delayed their wonder cancer drug, Fizamax (ferazepatab), again. This time up to 2 years because of promotional disputes.
“We were...
Hospital to Employ Empathy Robots to Allow Nurses and Doctors to Chart
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Tired of being treated like a number at big hospitals? Mercy Hospital in San Francisco wants to change that and they...
Game of Thrones Pain Scale
Are you like me and tired of giving the same old boring explanation of the 0-10 pain scale? Spice it up by using the...
Song of the Diverticulite (Morphine on High at 3am)
All the bickering of which is best
The song, the canvass, the word, the marbled stone,
The rest
Pittance such luxury
Lacking any test
Pittance yes!
Void of existential quest
Ver-Sed,...