Internal Medicine

Olympics

STDs Running Rampant in Sochi Olympic Village

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SOCHI, RUSSIA – Apparently what happens in Sochi doesn’t always stay there.  Olympic athletes have been going at it strong and GomerBlog is sad...

Pain Detector Gives Actual Pain Score

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JERSEY CITY, NJ - A great new invention coined PAIN, short for Pain Acquiring Instrument Neat-O, is starting to be utilized in ERs across the...

PyeongChang Update: Shirtless Tongan Hospitalized with Hypothermia

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PYEONGCHANG, SOUTH KOREA - Sadly, we knew it was bound to happen: Tongan athlete Pita Taufatofua, also known as the Shirtless Tongan, has just...

Feline Fibromyalgia Clinic Closes Amid Fraud Accusations

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ASHEVILLE, NC - A local veterinary specialty clinic closed its doors on Monday as fraud accusations swirl regarding its treatment and billing practices.  MaxxPurr...
Life Savers

True to Its Name: Life Savers Prevented 3 Million Deaths in 2017

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CLEVELAND, OH - A survey conducted by the National Institutes of Health (NIH) has gotten everyone's attention as it revealed that Life Savers hard...
John Doe

Breaking: Turns Out the Patient’s Name Really is John Doe

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NASHVILLE, TN - Well, it was bound to happen one day: members of the intensive care unit (ICU) team at Vanderbilt University have realized...
acid-base disorders

Study Concludes That Anyone Who Understands Acid-Base is a Big, Fat Liar

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BOSTON, MA - A landmark study in the latest issue of the Old England Journal of Medicine (OEJM) concluded "beyond a shadow of a...
non-emergency consult reasonable hour

Breaking: Consultant Called for Non-Urgent Consult at Reasonable Hour

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NASHVILLE, TN - First-year infectious diseases fellow Lena Burke burst into tears of joy when in the rarest of occurrences - certainly the first...
resting bitch face

Resting Bitch Face Underdiagnosed in Health Care Providers

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NEW YORK, NY - Despite the numerous advances and medical breakthroughs in 2015, GomerBlog reports that resting bitch face (RBF), a horrible affliction in...
ideal hospital floor plan

Floor Plans for Inpatient Medicine Wards: Reality vs. Dream

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In reality, this is what 95% of hospital medicine wards look like...  ... and now for the DREAM inpatient medicine ward!