Internal Medicine

aliens running emr

Ancient Aliens Take Over Electronic Medical Records

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GROOM LAKE, NV - Why does your electronic medical record (EMR) function sooooo poorly?  Are ignorance, negligence, and terrible design the answer?  Can intrusive government...
hospital lies

New Hospital Policy Aims to Punish Patients for Lying

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ORLANDO, FL – Have you ever been a victim of a lying patient, such as someone who lies about the intensity of their pain...
code placement

Dramatic ‘Code Placement’ Captured on Tape

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AUSTIN, TX - In breaking news, GomerBlog has received word of a dramatic “Code Placement” captured on tape on Unit 4E at Austin Medical...
medical patient on cell phone

Cell Phones Newest Weapon in Fight Against Pain

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BOSTON, MA - Cell phones are now on the list of items previously thought to have no therapeutic benefit, which are now being researched...
pharmacist

A Pharmacist’s Nightmare: A Drug Seeker & Their Excuses

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We all know that pharmacists and pharmacy technicians are on the front lines when it comes to drug-seeking patients. Somehow they can hold it...
breathing

4 Out of 5 Pulmonologists Agree: Breathing is Important

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CHARLESTON, SC – During a recent press conference, America’s top pulmonologists confirmed that breathing is extremely important and necessary for maintaining the function of...
the view

Patient Leaps to Death After Hospital TV Stuck on The View, Joint Commission Investigating

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OMAHA, NE - Burpelson Hospital is investigating the apparent suicide of patient Grover Downs on the 13-East psychiatric unit.  Mr. Downs, an 84-year-old man...
gi scope

Dr. Oz’s Colonoscopy Reveals That He’s FOS

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CLEVELAND, OH - After years of nauseating lies and verbal diarrhea, America’s leading medical quack Dr. Oz finally underwent a much needed colonoscopy today...
loser health care job

This Just In: Your Health Care Job Sucks

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Hey YOU, that’s right, I’m talking to you. Gomerblog just wanted to take some time to let you know that your job sucks. Really....

Move Over Pain Score….the Crazy Score is Here!

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Given the overarching success of the Pain Score leading to the opioid crisis, The Joint Commission (for Healthcare Absurdity) has now added the sixth...