Internal Medicine

zika virus

Weakened HIV No Longer Worthy of Own Chapter in Medical Textbook

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BETHESDA, MD—HIV, the AIDS-causing single-stranded RNA retrovirus that was once universally feared, has become so much easier to control over the last couple of...
patient takes health

Breaking News: American Patient Takes Responsibility for Own Health

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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - During multidisciplinary rounds on a cardiology unit at the University of Virginia Medical Center (UVAMC), a glimmer of hope was revealed...
bunk bed

Family Admits That Putting Grandma in the Top Bunk was Probably a Bad Idea

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BROOKLYN, NY - After thinking back on the events that had transpired over the past week, the family of 98-year-old Bertha Schwartz, who presented...
once upon a time

ID’s Epic Consult Note Starts with “Once Upon a Time”

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ALBANY, NY - A primary medical team at Albany Medical Center (AMC) is bracing themselves for the worst, as Infectious Diseases (ID) has just...

New CPR Guidelines Recommend Switching Out Providers Every 5 Cycles to Update Facebook Status

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ST. LOUIS, MO – The American Heart Association (AHA) conducted further research and has published the new 2014 recommendations for cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR).  Basic Life...
magic mouthwash

Famous Magicians Not Impressed by the Magic of Magic Mouthwash

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LAS VEGAS, NV - Several of the world’s most famous magicians - David Copperfield, Penn & Teller, and Criss Angel - have told GomerBlog...

BREAKING: New York City Resident Tests Negative for COVID-19

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“I’ve run 753 tests for COVID-10 this week alone and this man’s test was the first negative I’ve seen. I was nearly certain that everyone in Manhattan had Coronavirus.” Dr. Corbin explained.
doc mcstuffins

Study: Doc McStuffins More Evidence-Based Than Dr. Oz

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ANAHEIM, CA - Public health researchers have published the results of a new study which sought to objectively measure the quality of medical advice given...
vaccination

Breaking: Reports Emerge About An Uneventful MMR Vaccination

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ROCHESTER, NY - In what was internationally hailed as a medical first, doctors at Mount Saint Mary Mercy Hospital announced they are confident a...
toilet paper

Is 2-Ply 2-Much to Ask For?!

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NORFOLK, VA - Outrage has erupted from the Colorectal Department of Medi-Ocre Hospital over substandard staff toilet rolls.  Professor Daniel Rears has spearheaded this campaign...