Internal Medicine

iv pca infusion pump WiFi

Study: Doctors Can’t Operate an IV Infusion Pump Even If Life Depended On It

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BALDWIN, NY - A new study in the New England Journal of Alaris (NEJA) confirmed something we knew all along: doctors can't operate an IV...
medical residency

Maintenance of Certification Programs to Require Repeating Residency

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - If there ever was a solid example of mission creep, Maintenance of Certification (MOC) programs for physicians have set a new standard.  Overnight,...

Game of Thrones Pain Scale

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Are you like me and tired of giving the same old boring explanation of the 0-10 pain scale?  Spice it up by using the...
discharged patient

Patient Accidentally Discharged Home with Telemetry, Nasal Cannula, Central Line, Arterial Line, Nasogastric Tube…

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ST. LOUIS, MO - An embarrassed inpatient team at St. Louis Health Sciences admitted earlier today that they accidentally discharged patient Michael Berman home...

In Last-Ditch Effort, Federal Reserve Gives Crashing U.S. Stocks 1 Amp of Bicarb

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NEW YORK, NY - In a truly last-ditch effort to prevent U.S. stocks from crashing, the Federal Reserve Bank of New York has asked...
Trapped physician

Guest Delighted to Meet Physician at Party, Discusses Medical Symptoms for a Soul-Crushing 45...

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CHARLOTTE, NC - Last week at a cocktail party, a local woman was thrilled to learn that a another guest was a practicing internist.  "I've...

Doctor Diureses List with 80 mg of Lasix, Net Negative 14 Patients

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ATLANTA, GA - Finding his census of 20 patients unacceptable, medicine attending Randy Evans did the only logical thing: he gave his patient list...

Chaos as ICU Attending Touches Defibrillator

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LEBANON, IN – An internal mass casualty incident was declared at Saint Sebastian Hospital on Thursday morning after an ICU physician inadvertently discharged a...
pelvic exam

Tele-GYNs Now Offering Virtual Pelvic Exams

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GWINNETT, GA - OB/GYNs are the latest specialists to join the telemedicine craze in America, as Georgia Healthcare announced that their doctors, NPs, and PAs...

Updated 2015 ACLS Algorithm

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ACLS KEY BELOW: * Medical Team Confused as Patient Made DNR Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays ** Joint Commission Mandates Extensive Timeout Prior to Initiating CPR *** Product Review:...