PyeongChang Update: Shirtless Tongan Hospitalized with Hypothermia
PYEONGCHANG, SOUTH KOREA - Sadly, we knew it was bound to happen: Tongan athlete Pita Taufatofua, also known as the Shirtless Tongan, has just...
Medical Meth to Increase Tax, Dental Revenue
JAY, FL - Not since legalized marijuana increased Colorado's Revenues and Frito Lay's profits, has a drug’s side effects so quickly boosted another profession’s revenue....
Update: Cookie Monster Leaves Sesame Street Hospital AMA on Christmas Eve
SESAME STREET – As children around the world continued to hold candlelight vigils for Cookie Monster’s health, the shocking rumors that the muppet had left...
Contrary to Consultant’s Advice, Doctor is Now Hesitant to Call Back with Any Questions
AUSTIN, TX - After admitting a patient with end-stage congestive heart failure, third-year internal medicine resident Amanda Cummings consulted the cardiology service to help...
Director of CME Conference in Hawaii Caught Off Guard When Participants Actually Show Up
WAILEA, HI—Jay Morgan, director of a popular annual CME conference in Hawaii, was caught off guard last week when participants actually showed up expecting...
New CDC Recommendation: Ignore Patients with Pain > 4
ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a new recommendation on the heels of March's "CDC Guideline for...
Colonoscopes Replaced by Plastic Reachers from Home Depot
CHICAGO, IL - Hospital administrators are looking to tighten the pursestrings some more as they look to replace colonoscopes with plastic reachers & grabbers...
Mysterious Squiggly Line on Monitor Does Not Actually Correlate with Patient’s Biophysical Data
Recent events in the CICU at riverside Methodist left staff nurse Andy Long perplexed about the respiratory lead from the patient mr Rawlings in...
Tips: How to Worsen Your Already-Terrible Bedside Manner
You may find your bedside manner is pretty terrible given how busy you are and your general frustration with humanity as a whole. If...
BREAKING: U.S. Patient Tests Positive for COVID-19, SARS, MERS, Ebola, Bubonic Plague, Measles, Smallpox,...
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news to Gomerblog, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention has identified a patient who has not only tested...