Nursing

caps lock

NURSE SUSPENDED FOR WRITING NOTES IN CAPS LOCK

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NORFOLK, VA - NURSE AMANDA HAN WAS SUSPENDED EARLY THIS MORNING BY HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATION FOR THE SAME OFFENSE YET AGAIN: ALWAYS WRITING HER NOTES IN CAPS LOCK.  ADMINISTRATION HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO RELIEVE...
doctorate of nursing

Nurse Raises the Post-Nominal Letter Bar

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PORTLAND, OR - Nurse Ruth Scrittle, ASN, BSN, MSN, DNP, RN, MBA, CEN, ACLS, CENP, FAEN, is actively petitioning to have additional letters added to the alphabet in order to increase the length of...
Foley, bloodbath

Patient Can’t Wait to Yank Out Foley, Cause Bloodbath

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ATLANTA, GA - In exciting news today, patient Arnold Starks has announced that later today he will yank out his Foley with "full force and maximum torque" and absolutely looks forward to the horrific...

Patient Gives Hospital 1-Star Rating on TripAdvisor

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LANGDON, ND – After a recent 43-day admission, local resident Sylvia McElroy reviewed her stay at Cavalier County Memorial Hospital with a disappointing 1-star rating on Trip Advisor®. “Where do I begin? This place simply...
preying on interns

New Law Now Requires Nurses to Obtain Hunting License Before Preying on New Interns

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SACRAMENTO, CA – The controversial bill which aims to protect new interns from being exploited by hospital staff was signed into law by Governor Monee Grab last Tuesday. However, the backlash of this well-intentioned...
piggy bank, gruesome

Piggy Bank in OR After Gruesome Attack with Hammer

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ATLANTA, GA - Trauma surgeons at Grady Memorial Hospital, one of Georgia's Level I Trauma Centers, are working around the clock to piece back together one beloved Pete the Piggy Bank after he was ruthlessly...
surgical bouffant

Surgeons are Furious! The Bouffant vs. The Skull Cap

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For decades, the skull cap has been the surgical cap of choice for many surgeons across the country.  Recently, hospitals have begun banning the use of skull caps in favor of the bouffant hat...

Hospital Administrator: It’s Important to Have Work-Life Imbalance

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NEW YORK, NY - Hospital administrator Todd Williams told media today that he understands that burnout among health care practitioners is a very real issue, which is why he is reassuring everybody by saying...
nurse lunch

Administrators Throw Nursing Appreciation Lunch, Nurses Too Short-Staffed to Attend

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“They just don’t appreciate our appreciation!” exclaimed CEO Benjamin Green, referencing the absence of nurses as he gathered with his fellow administrators in Good Samaritan Hospital’s C-suite conference room for the annual nurse appreciation...