NASA Nurses Still Awaiting Callback from Extraterrestrial Docs
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Saying it's been well over 45 minutes since they had sent the pages, nurses at the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) are still awaiting callbacks from any of several extraterrestrial...
A Step-by-Step Guide on How to Use Incentive Spirometers (or Marijuana)
Is this your first time using an incentive spirometer (or marijuana)? Well, you're in luck: our Gomerblog team has created this easy 15-step process to using your incentive spirometer (or weed). Don't be intimidated,...
Is Your Nurse Trying To Hook Up With You?
Being admitted as a patient can be a scary and vulnerable time. Why not take this opportunity to get laid in your hospital bed, reverse Trendelenberg style! Talk about a rush of blood to...
Massachusetts Hospitals to Restrict “A**hole to Nurse” Ratio
BOSTON, MA - Although a ballot question proposing stricter nurse-to-patient ratios was defeated in the Massachusetts midterm elections in November, hospitals are taking initiative by addressing a more sinister problem: the asshole-to-nurse ratio.
Dr. Ivory...
Nasogastric Broccoli, Brussels Sprouts Recommended for Children Who Refuse to Eat Vegetables
With parents struggling to get their kids to eat their vegetables, some doctors have developed a new workaround.
“We used to just use nasogastric (NG) tubes for our patients who couldn’t swallow safely,” said Pediatrician...
Neonatal Falls on the Rise
A recent report in a major peer reviewed medical journal (then poorly summarized in an advertisement laden medical bulletin email) has uncovered yet another disturbing sign of the growing disconnect between America's youth and...
Ultra Breaking News: Patient Doesn’t Want Turkey Sandwich
NORFOLK, VA - Gomerblog brings you a startling development: A patient hospitalized at an area hospital in Norfolk has caught his inpatient medical team off guard by stating he doesn't want a turkey sandwich...
Massachusetts Physician Now 8 Feet Tall Thanks to 80 Physician Extenders!
NEWTON, MA – Dr. Joe Sefrusso was one of the smaller kids in his neighborhood growing up, always picked last for pickup basketball games. Through his medical school and residency training, he continued to...
Medical Student Draws Blood for the First Time, Prefers Using Markers Over Crayon
In a rural hospital in West Virginia, Vance Agarwal a fourth year medical student nearing the end of a rural medicine elective had the opportunity to draw blood for the first time. Under the...
Massachusetts Nurses Union Urges Mandatory 3 Nurses to 1 Patient Ratio to Boost Lagging...
BOSTON, MA – When Massachusetts voters head to the polls next week, the first question they will face is whether or not to initiate mandatory nurse:patient ratios. It’s literally called “Question 1” because apparently...
