American Academy of Pediatrics Announces That Whatever You’re Doing Probably Fine
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a surprise announcement early this morning, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) released a new recommendation stating that whatever you’re...
Breaking: Reports Emerge About An Uneventful MMR Vaccination
ROCHESTER, NY - In what was internationally hailed as a medical first, doctors at Mount Saint Mary Mercy Hospital announced they are confident a...
Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level
KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental...
Narconipple Implant Helps Add Opioids to Breastfeeding
SEATTLE, WA - Narconipple Inc. is pleased to introduce its revolutionary patented product, the Fentanypple. The Fentanypple is a narcotic breast implant that delivers...
Local Mom Decides Against New Brake Pads
MICHIGAN - Local mom, Jennifer Leeders, brought in her Acura MDX for its annual maintenance. Her mechanic recommended new brake pads, a routine recommendation....
Vader Pharmaceuticals Introduces New EpiLightsaber for Anaphylaxis
DEATH STAR II - In response to the growing prevalence of food allergies among employees of the evil Galactic Empire, Vader Pharmaceuticals have announced...
Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes
EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
What Your Doctor or Nurse Means When They Say Your Loved One is ‘Doing...
The devil is in the details and, for patients and family members, those details can be hard to squeeze out of those shifty doctors...
New Study Shows Father’s Breast Milk Improves Babies’ Intelligence over Mother’s Breast Milk
DENVER, CO – AstraZeneca recently announced that its new drug, Milkaman, was approved by the FDA for male breastfeeding. This novel drug causes pectoral muscle cells in...
Intrepid Med-Peds Explorers Set Out to Search for Rumored Med-Peds Hospitalist Jobs
YUKON TERRITORY, CANADA - Dispatches from the frozen north today report that a group of 40 brave Med-Peds physicians have set out into the...