Pediatrics

Rand Paul

Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level

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KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental...
Crayola, codes

Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes

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EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
airplane

Newborn Delivered at 35,000 Feet: A Doctor’s Perspective

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SOMEWHERE OVER HOBOKEN, NJ – It’s amazing how there is always a doctor around when you need one.  Hardly 200 miles into my flight...
elderly lady

100-Year-Old Finally Ready for Discharge from NICU

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CENTENNIAL, CO—Yesterday, a 1200-month-old newborn, Sandy Genarian, was finally discharged from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit of Centennial Medical Center, where he has been...

Medical Specialties as Game of Thrones Characters

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As all medical specialties try to gain control of the hospital, we've narrowed down who their characters are: Cardiology, you poor tortured soul with a...
ophthalmology Mr. Potato Head

Ophtho Emergently Consulted to Reattach Mr. Potato Head’s Eyes

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BROOKLYN, NY - Emergency room physicians at Maimonides Medical Center did not waste any time consulting ophthalmology to restore the vision of Mr. Potato...
loser health care job

This Just In: Your Health Care Job Sucks

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Hey YOU, that’s right, I’m talking to you. Gomerblog just wanted to take some time to let you know that your job sucks. Really....
surgeon biopsy malignant fusion

Surgery Residents Bring Other MDs to Work for a Day

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5:00 am: Arrive at hospital. Peds and Psych are borderline comatose still. Medicine seems confused to find that the hospital lights work this early in...
whole milk

Surgeon General: Generation of Adults, Unwisely Formula-Fed as Infants, Should Start Getting Breastfed Now

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WASHINGTON, DC—Mrs. Beaumont came home early one day last week and walked in on her 50-year-old husband sucking on the nipple of a gorgeous...
veteranarian

Veterinarians to Care for Children

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DES MOINES, IA - Citing the growing shortage of pediatricians and family medicine doctors in rural areas, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) is set...