Vaccines Cause Children to Love Minecraft
It really couldn’t be more obvious, just look around. We NEVER saw a child playing Minecraft when I was growing up, never. Now it’s...
New Apgar(t) Score to Check Troponins 1 & 5 Minutes After Birth
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) is modifying the Apgar score to an Apgar(t) score in which troponins will...
AAP Announces New Screening Tool for Resident Developmental Delays
OKLAHOMA CITY, OK – American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has responded to a request from the American Medical Association (AMA) and constructed a new screening...
American Academy of Pediatrics Announces That Whatever You’re Doing Probably Fine
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a surprise announcement early this morning, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) released a new recommendation stating that whatever you’re...
Ophtho Emergently Consulted to Reattach Mr. Potato Head’s Eyes
BROOKLYN, NY - Emergency room physicians at Maimonides Medical Center did not waste any time consulting ophthalmology to restore the vision of Mr. Potato...
SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover
DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the...
Jimmy Kimmel and Real Doctors Preach on Getting Vaccines
Another reason to get your kids vaccinated
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgpfNScEd3M
Pediatric Resident Refuses to Relinquish Caught Nose
HOUSTON, TX- A 12-hour stand-off with law enforcement involvement took place today at the outpatient pediatric clinic at Texas Children's Hospital. In what appears...
La Leche League Busted for Trafficking Cocaine in Confiscated Similac Containers
CHICAGO, IL - Yesterday, the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) announced that it is making hundreds of arrests after blowing the flexible, Frisbee-style lid off...